NUTTY NAMES NOOK 

Hope he's not hitched to A. Ham.

German cleaning products have funny names!

Boring...finally laid to rest!

Quick Robin - to the Bat-Opthalmist!

Obviously Casanova did come a courting!

An odd combination.

A curious clan name indeed.

Dodge Ball will never be the same again!

Game OVER ...indeed.

Sniggleupkinsworthbottom (gnome name).

BAFFLING NAMES IN BEAUTIFUL B.C. 

In case you were thinking of visiting or moving to "Beautiful British Columbia" Canada, (host of the 2010 Winter Olympic Games), here's a sample of the fruits and nuts you may encounter there.

For the benefit of those who don't know the territory or the type of folks who live there, British Columbia - The Lampoon offers a glimpse of what you can expect to see in this westcoast Canuck province.

In this eco-friendly place, you'll be delighted to know you can row a boat out into the middle of Lake Okanagan and spot a rarely-seen monster named Ogopogo (no relation to a cartoon character named Pogo, a possum from Okefenokee Swamp in Georgia). Note: Don't forget to take along a life preserver unless you can walk on water.

If that doesn't capture your fancy, maybe staying overnight at the hard-to-find "Heavenly Hideaway Motel", having a chinwag at the Blasted Church Winery, or meeting up with elusive members of the Cheery Tidings Most Fulsome Gospel Church and the Harbour Vipers Ratepayers Association in the Lower Mainland, or the Organic Moondance Coalition (on one of the Gulf Islands) would be an enlightening if not entertaining experience.

"Beautiful British Columbia" is also home to real people named Duff Pattulo (former Premier in the 1940's), Nelson Skalbania, (a boisterous biggy wiggy), and a writer named Bitsy O'Banion not to mention non-existent nutty characters like "Buffy Moneybox", "Jay Forget-Me-Not", "Joy Cogwheel", "A.N. Onymous", "Morely Smiley", "Reverend Oral Swill", "Sylvanio Stonegall", and "Wally Wolf" from real 'happening' places like Spuzzum and Ucluelet, and Fanny Bay.

Before leaving this pristine paradise, don't forget to ask for your copy of The Fraser Institute Crayon Reader (written by some enigmatic economists at a reputable right-wing think-and-do-tank in Vancouver).

Oh, one more thing while you're at it, why not pick up Ciao Chow! The Fabulous Vancouver Restaurant Guide by Suzette Le Frangipani, (obviously a pseduonym). She says the best place to take the family out to dinner is the Leftovers Collective Eatery!

FUNNY FOODS FOR YOUR TANTALIZING TASTEBUDS 

Maybe these Burritos have gone bonkers.

No ordinary Cock & Bull, believe me!

Your GI tract will love it!

Great grub for old codgers and coots!

For Slap Happy Folks only!

TREATS FROM A TOME 

A delightful book by Ambrose Bierce entitled The Devil's Dictionary offers rather fine collection of oddly named institutions such as:

-- Ancient Order of Modern Troglodytes
-- Ancient Sodality of Inhospitable Hogs
-- Associated Deities of the Butter Trade
-- Blatherhood of Insufferable Stuff
-- Cooperative Association for Breaking into the Spotlight
-- Dukes of Eden
-- Fee-Faw-Fummers of the Inimitable Grip
-- Garden of Galoots
-- Genteel Society of Expurgated Hoodlums
-- Grand Cabal of Abale-Bodied Sedentarians
-- Guardian of the Mystic Cesspool
-- Guardians of the Great Horn Spoon
-- Holy Gregarians
-- Knights and Ladies of the Yellow Dog
-- League of Holy Humbug
-- Mystic Alliance of Gorgeous Regalians
-- Polite Federation of Gents-Consquential
-- Prelates of the Tub and Sword
-- Resolute Optimists
-- Sublime Legion of Flamboyant Conspicuants
-- Visonaries of Delectable Bosh
-- Worshippers at the Electroplated Shrine

Bierce also brings to his readers such inimitable yet illusory illuminati as: "Durang Gophel Arn", "Borey the Bald", "Armit Huff Bettle", "Anonymous Bink", "Oglum P. Boomp", "Orpheus Bowen, "Marth Braymance", "Hassan Brubuddy", "Conmore Apel Brune", "J.H. Bumbleshook", "Salder Bupp", "Xamba Q. Dar", "Ambat Delaso", "Chauncey Depew", "Pollo Doncas", "Barel Dort", "Pobeter Dunk", "Booly Fito", "Bissel Gip", "Bootle P. Gish", "Apuleius M. Gokul", "Orrin Goof", "Richard Gwow", "Hannibal Hunsiker", "Halcyon Jones", "Opoline Jones", "Jarn Leffer", "Baruch de Loppis", "Mumfrey Mapple", "Jupter Muke", "Bugul S. Purvy", "J. Milton Sloluck", "Giacomo Smith", "Juan Smith", "Polydore Smith", "Sigismund Smith", "Stromboli Smith", "The Reverend Dr. Mucker", "M.P. Nopput", "Blary O'Gary", "Naramy Oof", "Jared Oopf", "Orm Pludge", "Romach Plute", "Balthasar Pober", "Alexander Poke", "Porfer Poog", "Bartle Quinker", "Tinley Roquot", "Lavatar Shunk", "Dudley Spink", "Arbley C. Strunk", "Offenbach Stutz", "Fernano Tapple", "The Roaring Gimlet", "Toodles", "Venable Strigg", "Fogarty Weffing", "Wauky De Woggy", "Joel Spate Woop", "Jorrock Wormley", and "John William Yope" among others.

Warning: readers are advised to keep a piece of paper beside their bedside while reading the dictionary so as to keep track of who's who.

HAS THIS BABE GONE BONKERS? 

Karen Elizabeth Gordon, a witty wordmistress, has penned several classic comic reference books with unusual titles:

-- The Deluxe Transitive Vampire
-- The New Well-Tempered Sentence (A Punctuation Handbook for the Innocent, the Eager, and the Doomed)
-- Torn Wings and Faux Pas: A Flashbook of Style, A Beastly Guide Through the Writer's Labyrinth
-- The Disheveled Dictionary - A Curious Caper Through Our Sumptuous Lexicon
-- My Dear Mother: Stormy, Boastful and Tender Letters By Distinguished Sons from Dostoevsky to Elvis.

Illustrious illumati called upon to make a perspicacious point include:

Foxy Belle Bloom (one whose "boudoir looked like a cross between a hairdresser's for rejects from Dante's Inferno and a tawdry scrap of seraglio torn from a time-share in Constantinople").

Strophe Dulac (the undisputed doyenne of bodice-ripping metafiction, who from time to time has engaged in nit-picking about novelettas such as The Duchess of Malfatti and Creepy Suzette).

Cram Fossilblast (a person capable of extracting a feather from his waiscoat pocket to titillate someone's syllogisms).

Vole Incubyte (the genius behind a little known stolen masterpiece called Fishmonger Taking His Carp Back in a Huff which isn't very important in the great scheme of things unless one is interested in trivial tidbits of life on what could be best described as a slow news day).

Nimbo Moostracht (a Eurobanker par excellence with strange acquaintances such as a ruthless band of brigands with fans and short-wave radios).

Garland Slattersly (author of Giovanna's Mortgage and The Girl with the Golden Eyesore, is an odd sort who relishes the idea of presenting his tragic heroines in an unflattering light).

Zoe Platgut (a kindergarten teacher whose famous last words are, "Your daughter is the most recondite urchine ever to scrape her boots on the doormat of my classroom".)

Jusko Bou Trompe, (a vain vocalist who dearly loves to hear himself sing an obscure melody called, "Blaze On, My Little Tumbleweed").

Too-Too LaBlanca (her existence shows the need for hyphenated names to liven up the language).

Other bizarre titles appearing in her terse tomes include:

-- Anatomy of a Murmur
-- Dusting the Credenza
-- Life Is Too Big Without You
-- Out of the Loud Hound of Darkness

HANDBOOKS FOR THE HOOPLA-INCLINED 

The New Well-Tempered Sentence: A Punctuation Handbook for the Innocent, the Eager, and the Doomed

by Karen Elizabeth Gordon

Great for grammarians on the go, or the prose-impaired.

Amazon Price: $8.00 (as of 05/09/2008)

Paris Out of Hand: A Wayward Guide

by Karen Elizabeth Gordon, Barbara Hodgson, Nick Bantock

Absurdist humor for accidental tourists.

Amazon Price: (as of 05/09/2008)

The Disheveled Dictionary: A Curious Caper Through Our Sumptuous Lexicon

by Karen Elizabeth Gordon

A lovely addition to one's little loo library!

Amazon Price: $8.50 (as of 05/09/2008)

Torn Wings and Faux Pas: A Flashbook of Style, a Beastly Guide Through the Writer's Labyrinth

by Karen Elizabeth Gordon

A whimsical approach to the oddities of the English language.

Amazon Price: (as of 05/09/2008)

The Deluxe Transitive Vampire: A Handbook of Grammar for the Innocent, the Eager and the Doomed

by Karen Elizabeth Gordon

Where vampires demonstrate the basic principles of English grammar.

Amazon Price: $16.29 (as of 05/09/2008)

REMARKABLE NAMES OF REAL PEOPLE 

With the aid of an international network of correspondents, who studied directories biographies, and newspapers and scoured business records, hospital and court files not to many other obscure news sources, John Train has compiled and annotated two humorous classics: Remarkable Names of Real People and Even More Remarkable Names.

Besides showcasing the wit, elegance, and erudition of Mr. Train, these books provide a panoramic view of bizarre and hilarious names of actual people, together with their occupations.

-- Alexander Comfort (Author of "The Joy of Sex")

-- Oscar Asparagus (Basketball Star, Maclean's Magazine)

-- Oofty Goofty Bowman (Shakespearean Actor, Milwakee, Wisconsin)

-- Mrs. Cistern Brothers (Hog Neck, North Carolina)

-- Ophelia Bumps (Richmond, Virginia)

-- Betty Burp (Bureau of Vital Statistics, Jacksonville, Florida)

-- Fairy Clutter (Indiana University of Pennsylvania Women's Club, Indiana, Pennsylvania)

-- LeGrunt E. Crapper (Johns Hopkins Hospital, Baltimore, Maryland)

-- Dr. E.Z. Filler (Dentist, Roslyn Heights, New York)

-- Hilarius Fuchs (Continental Grain Company, New York City)

-- Kinky Friedman (A mirthful mystery writer from Texas)

-- Dr. Gargle (Dentist, New York City)

-- Heidi Yum-Yum Gluck (Artist, Brooklyn, New York)

-- Loch Ness Hontas (Tulane Uniersity medical School, New Orleans, Louisiana)

-- Fanny Hunnybun (Nanny, South Devon, England)

-- Mr. Joynt (Marijuana Analyst, Royal Canadian Mounted Police Crime Laboratory, Alberta, Canada)

-- C. Sharp Minor (Silent Movie Organist, Rochester New York)

-- Sara Struggles Nicely (Clearwater, Florida)

-- Void Null (Teacher, San Diego, California)

-- Cashmere Tango Obedience (Agriculturist, Santa Cruz, California)

-- Mrs. Theresa Picnick (Nutritionist, Worcester, Massachusetts)

-- Ure A. Pigg (Restaurateur, Portland, Oregon)

-- Fortunate Tarte (Mary fletcher Hospital, Burlington, Vermont)

-- Hannibal Toto (Rome, Italy)

-- Hoghaw Twaddle (Morris Harvey College, now University of Charleston, Charleston, West Virginia)

-- Reverend Cornelius Whur (Trashy Poet, 1782-1853, England)

-- Eucalyptus Yoho (Oil Dealer, Portsmouth, Ohio)

And, if these don't tweak your curiosity, try on these hiliarious handles listed under the "diversions - comical names" tab. On the other hand, you might appreciate a lovely little tome from across the pond "Born for the Job: A Collection of Amusingly Apt Names (Daily Mirror)" by James Steen and Dominic Midgley.

NAMES TO ENTERTAIN YOU WHEN THE BOOBTUBE GOES BLANK 

FUNNY PLACENAMES

Wanna see some weird and wonderful welcome signs to towns you might be embarrased to visit?

ONLY IN NORTH AMERICA

Some pretty strange place names in North America...that's why they call it the "Wild Wild West"!

RUBY RED AND GREEN WITH ENVY

Some very odd plant names for people that fit like a glove on people with green thumbs.

IT'S A FOOL'S PARADISE IN CANADA!

Just the right spot to check out the mirth map of Canada ...because fools wearing beaver hats and mucklucks always rush in where angels fear to tread.

POOCH-FRIENDLY PLACES

Here's a great list of "pooch-friendly" place names in North America.

15 ODD PLACAES TO VISIT BEFORE EXPIRING

Don't miss out on these ripsnorting places of repose (that will tickle you pink if you're not careful)!

SAUCY SABBATICALS

Where are the best places to hang out if you're Cupid and Cassanova, or Romeo and Juliet?

VIVACIOUS VINO AND VIXENS

A wonderful list of wicked wine labels for those special occasions!

QUEENDOM OF QUIRKY

For those who need to know what inspires a mad-hatter monarch of mirth in the Land of Loopy Ladies and Gentlemen.

FUNNY NAMES

Names of people, places and things that will give you a chuckle!

FUNNY NAMES OF REAL PEOPLE

You mean someone actually has that handle?

FIVE ILL-FATED STORE NAMES

Here's a list of five unlikely store names...but you can probably come up with more!

LOOKING FOR LOVE IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES

A limited list but you could probably add the local laundromat at 3:00 am, the entrance to a sewage plant, or Hell, Michigan.

PLACES YOU MIGHT FIND JESUS

Maybe you can add to this list ... making a blessed burger at the Tomahawk Take-Out or inside a brand new Apple iPhone.

POSSIBLE FIRST NAMES FOR COUNT CHOCULA

Hmmm ... Englebert, Hislop, or Chi-Chi?

OTHER NAMES 'STING' COULD USE

Well now that 'Sting' is all grown up, maybe he'd consider "Bee Free".

LAST NAMES CLEARLY DERIVED FROM ANCESTRAL PROFESSIONS

Cook, Bone-Minder, and Headmaster?

NICKNAMES FOR A PIOUS PERSON

And we're not talking about any pious person here, we're talking about a devine dude named, "Jesus"!

TERRIBLE FAKE NAMES

Perhaps you'd care to add a few more.

BAD BABY NAMES BLOG

Now really, who would call their chirping chillybee "Urhines Icy 8 Special K"?

BUNNY CRUMPACKER

You mean there really is person called 'Bunny Crumpacker'...who reviewed a book titled "The Omnivore's Dilemma"?

WEIRD WORDS

A treasury of titillating if not all together peculiar words.

STRANGE STREET NAMES

Would you want to live or work on a street called, "Drunk Horse Lane", "Jingle Pot Road", or "Bucket of Blood Street"?

QWERKY IS VERY QUIRKY

Where else would you find weird, wild, and wacky names.

20 OF THE WEIRDEST SPORTS TEAM NAMES

How would you like to play for the "Scottsdale Community College Artichokes"? Let's hope they avoid wimpy workouts!

WHO IS COW MOUNTAIN CLYDE?

Hint: He loves horses and running mirthful marathons.

EAT MY WORDS!

A few product names that might make you laugh a titch!

POTTY, FARTWELL & KNOB...

Potty, Fartwell and Knob: From Luke Warm to Minty Badger - Extraordinary But True Names of British People

MIRTHFUL MARKS OF INDIVIDUALITY 

"Names are the distinctive marks of individuality that set everyone off from almost everyone else,"according to Larry Ashmead, the author of Bertha Venation, and hundreds of other funny names of real people.

Aside from "Bertha Venation", (the performing name of a drag queen) and Dockyard Doris (nickname of a witty welding wench), the remaining names in the book are all actual people.

Entries include among others:

Casa Enima (are you sure you want to meet this person?)

Dwayne Dwopp (the son of none other than Mr. and Mrs. Dwopp of course).

Fitz Funfrock (Sew what!)

Honeysuckle Weeks (probably a very pleasant-smelling soul).

Shanda Lear (daughter of the Learjet boss).

Roger Gotobed (Does he have a relative named Harry Gets-up-in-the-morning?)

Raine Shine

Reign Beau (the son of actor Ving Rhames).

Miklos Thunderbolk.

Trodat Fishback.

Jennifer 8 Lee (daughter of a New York Times reporter).

A RESTAURANT IS A RESTAURANT IS A RESTAURANT 

Anyone who is opens a palatable place for fashionable feedbags knows that the name is everything.

So it should come as no surprise that those wishing to avoid being referred to as "the hole in the wall restaurant at the end of the universe" should choose their name wisely.

Sometimes, the more hilarious the handle the better as in the case of The Ugly Corner Cafe in Oakville, California, (Napa Valley wine country).

And, it always helps if you can distract potentially disgruntled patrons with some "cow-girl" art before they dig into their brazen bit of beefsteak and "flat small goods" (whatever those may be)! Let's face it, there's something to be said if you can cash in on "the good, the bad and the ugly" wherever you can find it!

On the other hand, if ugly ungulates don't grab your fancy, why not putter on over to the "Unnamed Cafe" at Francis Ford Coppola's Winery Rosso & Bianco in Geyserville, California. For those who don't know the difference between plonk and pinot gris, they also serves "Boont Amber Ale" to bemused bottle-lovers.

EDUCATION COMES IN MANY FLAVORS 

It seems that young people, their parents, and administrators at degree mills are convinced that the best meal ticket to a prosperous, secure future can be found in universities and colleges.

For those who prefer a less-arduous route to becoming "top dog" or "numero uno", The University of the Bleeding Obvious, offers a number of odd bits of bumpf for bored minds including: "Teaching Carrots to Fly", "Ten Things You Never Knew About Frogs", "Extreme Dinosaurs", "Death by Pastry", "Maisy Donnington's Cheese Etiquette", and "Venus by Catapult" (among others designed to keep one amused while others fail, fizzle, or flounder about in a jobs they really don't like and would rather be learning about "Barry the Road Safety Owl", just like you).

Nerds, nudnicks, and non-traditional nincompoops may also wish to consider enrolling in stupendously silly seminars and "slacker sabbaticals" for penny-pinching party-poopers, "Getting-to-know-you Group Hugs for Damsels-in-Distress", wicked witch workshops for wonky wiccans, as well as a brand new weekend retreat entitled "Dragon-Slaying for Beginners". These programs are offered by the Creative Loafing Institute, (an enigmatic, eclectic educational body).

Loafers and lollygaggers are pleased with the leisurely-pace of courses featuring "do-nothing exercises", laugh-along lectures on the best books never written, and "really neat things to do in the Year of the Pig".

According to bashful bookworms, the Creative Loafing Institute has given them new hope by nurturing their "inner egghead". They have also been thrilled about learning "How To Paint By Numbers", "How to Connect the Dots" and "How To Build A Little Loo Libary" not to mention wonderful ways to indulge their sense of cockamamie curiosity by deliving into the instutute's rather fine collection of bizarre books and droll dictionaries, not to mention taking an excursion into the little known world of BS and balderdash.

BIG BUREAUCRACY AT IT'S BEST! 

WHO IS HELLFIRE HOTCHKISS? 

Mark Twain, beloved American author, wrote a series of little-known burlesque bits and transvestite tales, over a long period between 1860 and to 1900, among them, Hellfire Hotchkiss.

Hellfire Hotchkiss (1897) is about a "genuwyne male" woman and a "genuwyne female" man in a Missouri town and a series of stories that center on cross-dressing women put on trial as putative fathers in paternity suits and the fantasy children of transvestite couples.

Here's one entertaining excerpt from Hellfire Hotchkiss:

"If husbands could realize what large returns of profit may be gotten out of a wife by a small word of praise paid over the counter when the market is just right, they would bring matters around the way they wish them much oftener than they usually do. Arguments are unsafe with wives, because they examine them; but they do not examine compliments. One can pass upon a wife a compliment that is three-fourths base metal; she will not even bite it to see if it is good; all she notices is the size of it, not the quality."

HUBBA HUBBA HORESEFEATHERS 

• "Blow Me"
• "Spank It"
• "Jail Bait"
• "Barely Legal"
• "Cherry Pop"
• "X-Rated Fantasy"
• "Cunning Stunt"

POTTY PLANT NAMES 

Green thumbed-folk will definitely appreciate Ruth Draper's horticultural hee-haw entitled, "Down the Garden Path".

It seems that a certain middle-aged lady has a passion for showing guests her English country garden full of bunkum blossoms and balderdash bushes.

"Come, Mrs. Guffer, do come. I am longing for you to see the garden...", as she pauses at each plant on her pathway:

Dampfobias, (don't do well unless they have lots of rain).

Pomona Grandiglora, (is supposed to have blossoms as large as a saucer, but her plant unfortunately doesn't).

Glubjulla, (something that's supposed to grow well in soil, however her plant doesn't).

Glypsafantum, (a yellow plant that fills in the gaps and resembles a tattered tea-stained carpet).

Funnifelosis, (is supposed to have huge foliage and tall blue blossoms, regretably her plant doesn't).

Lummylosias, (better known as a creeper, and a wretched one at that).

Missayearea Idowtans, (an interesting plant that blooms every second year, but if infested with wireworms fails to bloom at all).

Mloop, (a treasurous plant with very peculiar colors).

Mrs. Huntley Buncum, (a fast fading rose which is said especially if one is trying to woo a paramour).

Punnyfunkum, (an annual that's supposed to grow under any condition and bloom in all seasons, her plant doesn't).

Seccalikums, (a happy plant that thrives in dry weather and dusty soil that dogs like to relieve themselves upon).

PEN PUSHERS WITH A PENCHANT FOR PECULIAR NAMES 

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Book 7) (Deluxe Edition)

by J. K. Rowling

The final book, written by the queen of quirky names.

Amazon Price: $65.00 (as of 05/09/2008)

The Complete Wreck (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Books 1-13)

by Lemony Snicket

Anyone with a name like "Lemony Snicket" has to be fun!

Amazon Price: $94.50 (as of 05/09/2008)

The Kalahari Typing School for Men (No.1 Ladies' Detective Agency)

by Alexander McCall Smith

Not your average sort of mystery story!

Amazon Price: (as of 05/09/2008)

The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide: Five Complete Novels and One Story (Deluxe Edition)

by Douglas Adams

Time to meet Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox and Harl!

Amazon Price: $19.99 (as of 05/09/2008)

Ascending Peculiarity: Edward Gorey on Edward Gorey

by Edward Gorey

A glimpse into the wonky words and world of Edward Gorey.

Amazon Price: (as of 05/09/2008)

NOT-YOUR-AVERAGE NAMES FROM P. G. WODEHOUSE 

Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, a British-born American humorist, novelist, short-story writer, lyricist, and playwright, (1881-1975), knew Edwardian England like the back of his hand, and took delight in creating a kooky lot of characters, and places for them to play and plop around.

What would a British bit of humor be without a tall and solidly respectable, magnificient manservent named "Jeeves" with a wicked sense of timing who can be found doing his thing in such scintillating spots such as the "Drones Club" (full of daft dukes and dotty duchesses), or more likely doing a stint or two in country homes like "Steeple Bumpleigh", "Twin Hall" and "Market Snodsbury".

Not-your-average servile somebody, this unflappable valet is full of jolly good adventure involving the extrication of his master, a laconic, upper-class twit named Bertie Wooster from unsuitable engagements to lovely ladies looking for a husband like "Honoria Glossop, Madelaine Bassett" and "Zenobia Hopwood". When he's not fending off those feckless feminine wiles, he can be found playing Cupid by promoting the course of true love between these maidens of mirth and Bertie's best buds - "Bingo Little", "Gussie Fink-Nottle" and "Barmy Fotheringay-Phipps".

Author of more than 96 novels and 18 plays and film scripts, and writer of lyrics for 33 musicals and 400 plus songs to his credit, Wodehouse was a prodigious professional indeed.

A list of his characters reveals a penchant for potty people ranging from the foppish foolishness of eccentric aristocrats and dim-witted debutantes, to disasterous diplomats and policemen whose hats are stolen far too often to be blamed on fate rather than folly.

LINKS THAT WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH A LITTLE 

REMARKABLE NAMES OF REAL PEOPLE

And you thought Bambina Broccoli was just a stage name?

TORONTO THE TERRIFIC!

Here are some rather fine business names from the telephone book in Toronto, Ontario (Canada).

UNUSUAL EATING ESTABLISHMENTS

Funny food and beverage places (predominantly in the U.S.A.).

LATIN FOR LAUGHS

Latin-lovers with fractured funnybones will adore this contribution to wacky world culture.

HILARIOUS HOROSCOPES BY WHO ...?

You have not lived until you have read your hilarious horoscope by an entertaining astrologer named "Ermstrum Galenheit"...and "Gesundheit" to you too!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT ZOOT HORN ROLLO'S REAL NAME IS?

You'll have to click on this link to find out!

BERTHA VENATION ...FUNNY NAMES OF REAL PEOPLE

Keep your eyes peeled for "Dick Byter" and "Velvet Busch" in Bertha Venation: And Hundreds of Other Funny Names of Real People by Larry Ashmead.

SPEAKING OF HILARIOUS HANDLES 

Here's a dazzling piece of dialogue from the popular TV cartoon show, "The Simpsons", on the origin of a nutty name:

Homer: My name's Max Power.

Some Guy: That's a great name.

Homer: I know, I got it off a hairdryer.

NIFTY NAMES IN NOVELS 

Charles Dickens, whose pen-name was "Boz", was not only considered one of the foremost English novelistd of the Victorian era, but also a vigorous social activist against the plight of the poor and the savage injustices perpetrated by the Industrial Revolution.

He is known for his intriguing invention of memorable characters whose names reflect the color of their personalities such as Messrs. Bumble, Gradgrind, Micawber, Muddlebranes, Pecksniff, Podsnap, Pumblechook, Pumpinskull, Sweedlepipe, Uriah Heep and the most widely recognized figure of all, a miserly and misanthropic man named Ebenezer Scrooge.

Dickens' other colorful characters included an orphan by the name of Sloppy ("Our Mutual Friend"); Wopsle, a parish clerk who decides it's a good deal more interesting in life to become an actor ("Great Expectations"); Polly Toodle a jolly, plump nurse who is fired by her patron Paul Dombey after having visited her dingy apartment in a poor area of London ("Dombey and Son"); Wackford Squeers in ("Nicholas Nickelby"), is a conniving, weaselly character who runs a horribly cruel orphanage for unwanted boys and Luke Honeythunder is the boisterous, overbearing philanthropist in ("The Mystery of Edwin Drood")

BATTY BOOKMARKS FOR THE BORED OR BEWILDERED 

FUNNY NAME FOLIO WELCOMES YOUR FEEDBACK! 

Feel free to leave your creative contributions, the more the merrier.