God made toilet paper to roll only one way.

1 - I can do better 2 - Jury's out 3 - Pretty darn good 4 - Splendiferous 5 - Awesometastic by 18 people | Log in to rate

Ranked #203 in Humor, #21,795 overall

HERE'S WHAT I THINK!

God made toilet paper to roll only one way.

In the great scheme of things, knowing how to install a toilet paper roll correctly can save your butt and your marriage, if not enhance your chances for promotion and that elusive golden key to the executive washroom!

The lovely little photo to the left clearly indicates the correct way to hang T.P.

God only knows what will happen to you if you get it wrong!!

TOILET PAPER PRACTICES: 

Even in the backwoods, folks know how to hang T.P. from trees ...from the top-down naturally!



__________

Image Credit: don33c@flickr.com

YOUR TURN! 

God made toilet paper to roll only one way.

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Yes, you're right!

simplegirl says:

Over, Over, Over!

HorseAndPony says:

Yep, over the top only.

NLS says:

Exactly right!

george1426 says:

I was the one to ask the question and I was sure it was over, but two ladies I know did it under. I was wondering whether they knew something I didn't or just did not know.

WhitneyWells says:

Definetly over the top!

brandy says:

to smoke it!

MEDHAT141 says:

Personally I think It should be always facing out, so I can see the end of it.

tom says:

Over, but God also makes toilet paper for those difficult people in your life

rwoman says:

Yes, it makes me crazy when it is rolled the wrong way. It has to roll from the top

kristin says:

Can you spare a square?

Eloise says:

The roll needs feed from the top. Otherwise, how would the very neat corner the paper? Has there ever been a successful toilet paper cornering from below?

If one determines that the roll should come from below, the PLEASE COFORM ALL OF YOUR BATHROOMS AS SUCH. At random toilet paper hanging is worse than consistantly hanging it incorrectly (which would be the roll coming from below, if I have not been clear.)

liz says:

over the top

CinderMaMa says:

It is definitely more convenient top down, but isn't it more important that the toilet paper is there at all? How about when the last to go uses it all and doesn't replace it. That's the real crime.

daria369 says:

Gawd, it's annoying when someone puts it in wrong...

MarketingSurge says:

I tell my wife it has to roll from the top down, she was raised the opposite.

Bob says:

It must roll OVER the top to be pulled towards you, NOT under from the bottom where you can't find the tail and you have to push the top AWAY from you to find it! - That does NOT make sense at all! Yet, where I live here in the South, some people insist on pushing the roll away from you to pull off the bottom! Ridiculous! I change it to the right way every chance I get!

tandemonimom says:

Well OVER is the correct way, EXCEPT when you have little hands that like to hit and spin that exciting bathroom toy and can waste a whole roll in seconds! So for many years (yeah, I have four kids!), to save my sanity and my toilet paper budget, we rolled UNDER. Thankfully the baby is 5 and we've long since returned to properly over-installing the TP!

Etiquette Expert by Design, Not Choice says:

Ok, I grew up in an insane household where etiquette was a BIG deal. That said, I can tell you that according to proper etiquette a toilet paper roll should always be hung under (ie with the flap wallside). Supposedly, only in a working-class home does the paper hang INTO the room, and hanging it that way is a sure give away of one's lower-class roots. Also, it is considered more sanitary to hang it under.

Steve says:

I don't care where I am, If the roll is on backwards, I switch it for the good of all who come after me.

MarcNorris says:

Over the roll is the right way to go. If it is not from the top, it just messes me up.

No way, Monkeybrain!

myusernameispermanent says:

hang it on a branch. Duh! That way even though your outdoors, it's just like indoors. It'll be sideways no matter what.

Treasures-By-Brenda says:

Who cares as long as it's there...

Alynn says:

It only makes sense to hang it wallside under. (Right Lorelee) It looks neater, you don't have to fumble trying to find the start point. Also, my cat will completely unroll it if someone places it on the wrong way.

Jeremy says:

I perfer under it looks neater tucked away and easier when
you have kids and potty training them but you are just
flushing money away anyway so whats the difference.

LJFWolffe says:

I've always believed in the hunter/gatherer theory of toilet paper. Men, who have been throwing overhand since the first spears, tend to insist on the top-down method; females, who since the gathering days are used to going from the ground up, tend to prefer it bottom-up. That's just been my experience.

PleasantValley says:

Both ways work fine. What's more important is the softness of the paper.

CindyJaneStone says:

A whole debate on TP, As if the world hasn't got enough problems. TP was first of all made by man, secondly the TP holder was made by man, and made to go both ways, over the top or under. What does it really matter, as long as you can tear off a piece of it and wipe your @r&&3 with it....

lazzeosangel says:

A guy is in a public toilet, but soon discovers there is no toilet paper on the roll. He calls into the next booth, "Do you have any tissue paper in there?"

"No," comes the reply.

"Do you have any newspaper?"

"Sorry!"

"Ummm, can you possibly break a 20 dollar bill ?"

Kathy

meeeooowww says:

Under looks classier and neater but whatever. If you are obsessing over toilet paper you need to see a therapist.

Ande says:

sideways

says:

You people are living in the past? We use the toilet seat powerwash and blow dry system! Toilet paper. Whats that?

Euryale says:

I once dated a man who tried to argue with me that toilet paper had to be hung a certain way. And yet, he could never actually prove it wouldn't work properly for cleaning his butt when hung in his non-preferred direction. And clearly, "God" did not invent toilet paper.

sensei says:

only barbarians use TP. civilized world uses warm water.

bdkz says:

No way...toilet paper always gets hung UNDER!

 
view all 48 comments

ON BEING A CELEBRITY:

"When someone follows you all the way to the shop and watches you buy toilet roll, you know your life has changed." -- Jennifer Anniston, American actress

For High-Muck-A-Mucks Only!

A GREAT GADGET FOR RESTROOM READERS 

When the going gets tough, the tough get going ...to the restroom where it never be boring, no siree, not with this nifty little gizmo!

The 'rsstroom reader' is a bathroom gadget that prints news feeds onto your T-P - that's right, your TOILET PAPER! The best part is the "biometrics" toilet seat will figure out who you are based on your weight, and then print only the news that meets your discriminating taste in tidbits, treats, and topics that will tickle your fancy!

Note please that one's "T-P news on demand" falls over the dispensing roller, not under it!

AND NOW A WORD FROM THE TOILET PAPER FAIRY 

The "Toilet Paper Fairy" is an elusive creature who known to inhabit throne rooms, water closets, and personal places of ease.

When God is busy with more pressing matters, he assigns the "Toilet Paper Fairy" the noble task of ensuring that toilet paper is hung correctly even when mere mortals have difficulty figuring out which way it should fall without having a hissy fit or major meltdown.

Here's an ode to "The Toilet Paper Fairy" by poet P. Light:

The toilet paper fairy lives at night.
And is seldom seen out in the days brightest light.
She's not your ordinary fairy, elf or brownie.
You know the kind that creeps in and cleans,
while your away from home.
Nor is she the type that finishes the shoemaker's jobs
so that his children won't starve.

No, to get anything from the t.p. fairy.
you must sneak into her very home.
Past her grey watchful guardian,
with its piercing yellow eyes, wings a fluttering.
knowing if you make the wrong move,
it will alert the world and set troubles upon you.
Or simply startle you with some sage bit of advice about your life.

Having passed the grey guardian,
You must then creep past the portals, into the very heart of the fairy's home
to find the gift at the end of your mission.
That single roll of toilet paper that she keeps there.
JUST FOR YOU...


__________

Insert Photo Credit: "Toilet Paper Fairy".

PRESERVE YOUR POSTERIOR - USE LESS PAPER! 


Let's face the facts:

1. Every year 25 million trees are literally flushed down the toilet in the European Union Alone.

2. On average people use about 10 metres of toilet paper every day, that's about 8 sheets per visit.

If you can't remember which way to install your toilet-paper in the roller, at least become a frugal feces fighter by 1) cutting your consumption in half by using only four sheets, and 2) planting a few trees every year to replace the ones you flush down the toilet!

Speaking of heavenly hijinks in the tinkle pantry, if there is no God, then who pops up the next facial tissue in the box!

T.P. TO THE RESCUE! 

At this point in time, Frank didn't give a sweet tweet about toilet paper etiquette.



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Image Credit: Smart Search@flickr.com

TOILET PAPER TOLERANCE TEST 

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ARMY CERTIFIED TOILET TISSUE SHOWING PAPER ROLL FALLS OVER NOT UNDER!

LITTLE LINK LIST FOR LOO LOVERS 

LITTLE LOO LIBRARY
The Little Loo Library provides an excellent resource for those who haven't a clue what reading material is required to keep their visitors happy, contented and relaxed while responding to the call of nature.
THE GLORIOUS GLOSSARY OF SNIT
A rather fine place for puckish princesses to retreat when they're fed up telling other people how to hang a roll of toilet paper correctly!
TEMPLE OF TOOTHPASTE
Those who have difficulty hanging toilet tissue should probably drop by the "Temple of Toothpaste" to get advice from the "Tooth Fairy" on how to brush their teeth and floss properly.
QUEENDOM OF QUIRKY
H.R.H. Quipping Queen is easily amused by people who go berserk when there's no TP in the throne room!
CHURCH OF CHORTLE
The best source of laughter liturgy for light-hearted lasses and lads!
PLUMBER'S BUTT - A CRACK EPIDEMIC
What is the ultimate bad fashion statement one can make?
TERRIFIC TP!
For discerning derriere enthusiasts, do drop by and pick up a few ripsnorting rolls of custom-made TP if you please.
HISTORY OF TOILET PAPER
No if's, and's or butts...this is the definitive guide for t.p. buffs!
THE BIG TISSUE
Frugal facts about t-p for your reading enjoyment.

BOG BOOKS FOR THE BAFFLED, BEMUSED AND BEWILDERED 

Common Sense: or Why Not to Look at the World throughColored Glasses, Two Toilet Paper Rolls, and Some Scotch Tape

An odd book that needs one's full attention in the privacy of one's personal place of ease.

Amazon Price: $16.95 (as of 11/28/2009) Buy Now

The 2007-2012 Outlook for Bathroom Toilet Paper Roll Holders in the United States

For those who are keen on studying the economics of investment in the American toilet paper roll market.

Amazon Price: $495.00 (as of 11/28/2009) Buy Now

Which Way Do I Hang The Toilet Paper???

A comprehensive guide to toilet paper hanging for beginners.

Amazon Price: $10.95 (as of 11/28/2009) Buy Now

Walking with God with Toilet Paper Stuck to My Shoe

For ladies who love God, tolerate TP, and adore shoes.

Amazon Price: $14.00 (as of 11/28/2009) Buy Now

Of Married Life and Toilet Paper

"The Toilet Paper Test" tells a lot about others, depending on how they hang their toilet paper.

Amazon Price: $9.95 (as of 11/28/2009) Buy Now

TERRIFIC BIT OF TINSEL T-P! (Image Credit: Pike Spice@flickr.com)

TOILET PAPER TRIVIA: 

POSITIVE PROSE from perfection-minded potty-paper enthusiasts appreciated! 

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by quippingqueen

Proof positive that some people are well potty-trained!


The Quipping Queen and Empress of Eccentricity

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