Inspirational Greeting Cards to Encourage a Terminally Ill Friend

They often live with pain that is excruciating. They may wonder if they will ever feel good again. Often they are almost housebound because of mobility problems or inability to drive and be independent. They feel they are losing control not only of their health, but also of their affairs, especially if they are elderly and others have taken over their financial decisions and even their living arrangements. Many people's families have put pressure on them to leave their beloved homes and move into a new community where they don't have any friends. Why? Because it's more convenient for the family member who expects to be assisting in care giving.

I encouraged my own mom to move close to me when I knew she was approaching her last years. She was still healthy for the first few years she was near me, but she did miss her old friends "at home," and found it difficult in my community to make new friends that were as close as the people she had known for over 50 years. As long as she was able to drive, she did pretty well finding some friends at church and clubs. She also did some volunteer work. But in the last three years, she began to have trouble remembering her commitments and appointments, and she had to stop those activities. Her friends and her sister back home preceded her in death, and the cards and letters that kept her "connected" stopped coming. Then her health began to fail until she finally was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 89 and given only two more months to live. You can read about our relationship during those last years here.

In this day of emails and text messaging, many people have forgotten what it's like to receive real snail mail. It's hard for them to relate to people who were born before there was television -- let alone the Internet or cell phones. Many of those under 30 today aren't used to sending handwritten letters and cards through the mail and want all their connections to be instant. They live life at a fast pace and can't imagine not being constantly connected to others. But the elderly and the lonely who may not understand the new technology or be able to sit for hours at a computer, or maybe sit very long anywhere, can receive a real boost in morale when they get a real written communication from a friend or family member in the mail. These people are often so lonely that even their junk mail gets read.

I'm a used book seller, and the children who cleaned up their parents' estates often used to call me to look over the book collections that were left behind. I remember one house where there were all sorts of books -- even duplicates, still in the shrink wrap they were delivered in. When I asked about that, I was told that the owner had been a shut-in and had ordered all kinds of stuff mail order just to have someone come to the door. These are the kind of people who look forward to the mail as a possibility of being the high point of the day. How disappointing when it's only junk mail and bills.

Many people think it's silly to send someone a card when email is so much faster. But even when a person is young, a real card with a personal message from a close friend or other loved one can be treasured. The elderly and housebound treasure them even more. My mom had stacks of cards in her closet people had sent her. I found them when she died. I know that every now and then she would look through them and remember those who had cared enough to send them. She also sent a lot of them herself to those she loved.

Emails and text messages by their very nature are not permanent. Paper cards can usually last as long as the recipient wants them to. They can be stored and pulled out when loneliness is overwhelming or when one is feeling so sick or depressed one feels like giving up. They can be read again and again -- even after the sender is gone. They can bring back memories of happier times spent with the people who sent them. They are well worth the money. A beautiful blank card with your personal message of encouragement, or an extra sentence or two when you sign your card cannot only make someone's day, but maybe will also give a lift to many other days.