Nasty Candy! How Weird Can It Get?

Collon candy isn't intentionally gross -- it's Japanese, and the name is merely coincidental. Or is it? One look at the brown, cream-filled tubes makes you wonder if those guys weren't actually chuckling as they put this thing together.

Asse -- the Japanese candy industry strikes again! Pair this delicacy with Chunky and you've got... a Chunky Asse? Deeeelicious!

Mmmm, Plopp. Chewy brown chocolate goodness. Want some? No? Oh. All the more Plopp for me!

Bonus Sweet: Sour Flush Candy. Kind of like Lik M Aid, only the candy stick is a plunger and the dip candy is in a toilet bowl. So go ahead -- dip the plunger in the toilet and lick it dry. Urg.

Bacon Mints
Bacon this, bacon that. Bacon chocolate we can pretty much handle, although let's face it, it's gross. But bacon mints were never meant to be. Why would anyone imagine that smoked pig meat and fresh breath belong in the same sentence, let alone in the same tin? Gross and weird, no two ways about it.

Chocolate Covered Pork Rinds
Maybe a little too bacon-oriented to be taken seriously, but the salty fat of a pork rind and the sweet taste of the chocolate might possibly be interesting. Weird, but maybe not entirely gross.

Dill Pickle Mints
Just... No. Okay? No.

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White Chocolate Maggots and Cockroach Bites
Starting out with a couple of easy ones here. These are gross, but the bugs aren't real -- the candy just looks and crunches like you would expect. The actual horror of dealing with spiny legs caught in your teeth is missing in these, though you could probably creep out your mom with these.

Scorpion Suckers
Now this is more like it. An actual, spiny, crunchy scorpion in a delicious sweet lollipop. Lick it long enough and you'll have a pretty nasty little mouthful to deal with. Gross AND weird.

HotLix Suckers
This candy company gets pretty far out there with what they will wrap in sugar and put on a stick. Not only so they offer beetles, worms, and bugs of all kinds, they also have jalapeno and other brutally hot pepper lollipops. Our kind of candy maker!

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Hose Nose Candy
Pretty much genius if you ask us. This candy is in the shape of a big nasty nose that you strap on over your own nasty nose. The candy is snot, which oozes out of the nostrils -- you're supposed to stick your tongue out and catch the snot candy as it flows out. Disgusting, and pretty dang cool.

Candy Scabs
Another genius move. Candy Scabs are little band-aids with red crusty candy scabs stuck to them. Remember those wonderful days of falling off your bike, skinning your knee, and then waiting for the scab to fall off? Now you can have your memories and EAT them, too.

Eyes of Terror Gumballs
The best thing about these suckers is the wrecked, bloodshot appearance. They really kind of look like they were yanked out of a corpse, and not too recently, either. You may actually think twice before you pop these in your mouth.

Ear Wax Candy
Who knew that ear wax was actually a tasty, fruit-flavored paste? All this time we've been cleaning out our ear wax and throwing the dirty q-tip away. That's a lot of candy goodness going to waste, my friend.

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