Lemurian Grotto and Fountain

I haven't come here to forgive the things others have done to me.

I've come here to forgive myself.

I walked through the ruined gates and murky waters and passed the ruined tombstones and and when I walk back out I'm going to leave behind every injury I've ever done to myself.

I need to lay it all to rest and move ahead.

So I'm going to forgive myself for all of those awful things I told myself over the years: I was stupid, ugly, worthless, dirty, a failure and a disgrace. Words and deeds more hateful and harmful then anything inflicted upon me by my worst enemy.

It's important that I forgive myself for making a life a chore, a task a sentence instead of the gift of adventure it was intended to be.

I've come here to forgive myself ... once upon a time my worst enemy.

I hope she will become my friend.

Anita Marie Moscoso

I shall fly on wings with this serpent of mine
So that I may partake of healing waters
To remember those who scorned me long ago
Not to ask forgiveness
There is nothing to forgive
To love children long gone is easy
To love he whom I loved for many years is no burden
I do not need to drink of the Crystalline waters
The past has been forgiven long ago
I will rest and remember without tears,
remembering those whose blood runs through my veins and
mine through theirs
I drink only at the fountain to quench my thirst....
Lois (Muse of the Sea)

I arrived at the well at high noon when my shadow was neither right nor left of me, when she was below me and, for the moment, out of sight.

The Blue Racer was draped across my shoulders, her serpent skin reflecting the brilliant blue of the sky. Her body was as the softest of leather. I called her Sunshine because even on the dullest of days, she was a ray of sunshine.

The letter, neatly folded into my pocket, asked forgiveness of many, not the least of which was myself. I was blamed, you see, for many things, most that were beyond my control, and I accepted and shouldered the guilt as if it were my duty to do so. I thought it was ... at the time. I accepted the blame and in turn, blamed others, which I discovered was a recipe for disaster.

I wrote and asked forgiveness of those whom I had, perhaps falsely, blamed. I told them that I was through shouldering the guilt I thought they had placed on my very young shoulders, telling them that it had taken me a very long time, decades in fact, to realize that I was not at fault and neither were they, for they were beings of their time as I am a being of mine. I knew as I approached the fountain that the burden had been lifted. The Serpent, Sunshine, had guided me through the labyrinth and to the fountain whose waters sparkled with the light of the universe. I retrieved the letter from my pocket and held out to the flowing waters. The sunlight caught it and burned, smoldering at first, from the center outward until all that remained were the ashes that floated away in the breeze.

I had cast my burden aside and in-so-doing had relieved others of theirs. Therein lies true forgiveness.

Vi
August 28, 2005

I have been down to the Fountain of Forgiveness this morning. I donned my glasses and absorbed the atmosphere around the river. The birds were very busy as you know it is almost springtime here. They were dancing around, singing their mating songs and feverishly picking choice titbits for their nests.

I took with me Esmeralda my beautiful snake. She is emerald green with metallic markings all along her back. She slid along beside me guiding me to the fountain. As we approached the pools I once again felt this sacred space. I sat, taking in the peace and calm of the waters. Gently I stooped down and put my face down and drank of this crystalline water.

I was moved to write my letter of forgiveness in the peace and quiet. As a sign that I had forgiven, I took my letter and with fire let it rise up in flames.