Guide to Christian Sex

As I wrote above I LOVE to laugh. I can find humor in almost any situation. It very well might be a way I cope with things... Anyway... a good joke, a laugh will lift anyones spirits. That merry heart God Talks about in proverbs does wonders!! I'm going to do my best to post a few jokes now and then. Be sure to stop by and rev up your giggle box if just for a few moments... Sometimes all that merry heart needs is a jumpstart!!

Here we go...

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.

One night they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home, and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home Mother of Six?"

His wife, irritated by her husbands' lack of discretion shouts back...

"Anytime you're ready, Father of Four!"

WOMEN:

- Women are honest, loyal, and forgiving. They are smart, knowing that knowledge is power. But they still know how to use their softer side to make a point.

- Women want to be the best for their family, their friends, and themselves.

- Their hearts break when a friend dies. They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

- A woman can make a romantic evening unforgettable.

- Women come in all sizes, in all colours and shapes. They live in homes, apartments and cabins. They drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.

- The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin! Women do more than just give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give compassion and ideals.

- They give moral support to their family and friends. And all they want back is a hug, a smile and for you to do the same to people you come in contact with.

MEN:

- Men are good at lifting heavy stuff and sometimes killing spiders

How to satisfy your wife every time

Caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, make plans, fix, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, feed, tantalize, bathe, humor, placate, stimulate, jiffylube, stroke, console, purr, hug, coddle, excite, pacify, protect, phone, correspond, anticipate, nuzzle, smooch, toast, minister to, forgive, sacrifice for, ply, accessorize, leave, return, beseech, sublimate, entertain, charm, lug, drag, crawl, show equality for, spackle, oblige, fascinate, attend, implore, bawl, shower, shave, trust, grovel, ignore, defend, coax, clothe, brag about, acquiesce, aromate, fuse, fizz, rationalize, detoxify, sanctify, help, acknowledge, polish, upgrade, spoil, embrace, accept, butter-up, hear, understand, jitterbug, locomote, beg, plead, borrow, steal, climb, swim, nurse, resuscitate, repair, patch, crazy-glue, respect, entertain, calm, allay, kill for, die for, dream of, promise, deliver, tease, flirt, commit, enlist, pine, cajole, angelicize, murmur, snuggle, snoozle, snurfle, elevate, enervate, alleviate, spotweld, serve, rub, rib, salve, gratify, take her places, scuttle like a crab on the ocean floor of her existence, diddle, doodle, hokey-pokey, hanky-panky, crystal blue persuade, flip, flop, fly, don't care if I die, swing, mollycoddle, squeeze, moisturize, humidify, lather, tingle, slam-dunk, keep on rockin' in the free world, undulate, gelatinize, brush, tingle, dribble, drip, dry, knead, puree, fluff, fold, blue-coral wax, ingratiate, indulge, wow, dazzle, amaze, flabbergast, enchant, idolize and worship, and then go back, Jack, and do it again!

How to satisfy a man every time

Show up naked.

Men are like mascara.
- They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

Men are like bike helmets.
- They are handy in an emergency, but otherwise they just look silly.

Men are like government bonds.
- They take so long to mature.

Men are like parking spots.
- The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

Men are like copiers.
- You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

Men are like lava lamps.
- Fun to look at, but not very bright.

Men are like bank accounts.
- Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.

Men are like high heels.
- They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

Men are like curling irons.
- They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

journalist had done a story on gender roles in Kuwait several years before the Gulf War, and she noted then that women customarily walked about 10 feet behind their husbands.

She returned to Kuwait recently and observed that the men now walked several yards behind their wives. She approached one of the women for an explanation. "This is marvelous," said the journalist. "What enabled the women to achieve this reversal of roles? Replied the Kuwaiti woman: "Land mines!"

I found this article cruisin' around DIGG.com . ( DIGG is really cool. Go have a gander at it... ) This news story is about about a pastor who openly discusses sex and the Christian relationship. They are not shy about it either. It is very encouraging. CLICK and have a look...