Who is Heloise ?

1. She (and her mother before her) were rocking the domestic diva world long before Martha baked her first designer cookie!

2. She knows EVERYTHING (ok, forget diva, we're talking demi-goddess status here)!

3. I LOVE her hair! If I ever go gray, I want it to look like that!

Heloise, famed for her household hints, wants to give a few to the small-business owner who uses e-mail.

"It is the written word and, as such, it is permanent," says the internationally syndicated columnist and author. "Even when 'deleted,' there can still be a record -- or many records -- of it out there."

What makes e-mail particularly tricky, adds Heloise, is that we're all still coming to grips with another relevant "e" -- etiquette.

Here she offers small-business owners her top 12 tips for first-class e-mailing:

1. Never fire off an e-mail in anger -- or in haste. "This is probably the worst mistake of all," says Heloise. "Unfortunately, the immediacy of the medium makes it all-too-easy to do." Her solution? "Write right away, if you must -- but then print out, read and set aside. Chances are you'll seriously rewrite your final draft."

2. Be specific in the subject line. That means, "Your contract for the ABC project," not "Hello" or "Good news." "Pretend you're a headline writer," she says.

3. Don't forget to salute. Just because there's a "To" line doesn't mean you can forego the amenity of a salutation. Depending on your familiarity with your correspondent, you can precede your message with "Dear Bob" or "Dear Mr. So-and-so."

4. Pull your punches. When firmness or anger must be expressed, realize that stark text without modifying gestures or voice inflection can make you sound harsher than you intend. Compose once you're composed -- "Then have a trusted third party review it before you click 'send'," advises Heloise.

5. Can the ee cummings imitation -- don't use all lower-case lettering. Yes, you're busy and e-mail lends itself to informality, but "it probably takes more time and effort to keep remembering not to hit the shift key, when appropriate, than to do it," she notes. "The conventional is always easier for the reader's eye."

6. Give the benefit of a doubt. Because there are no face-to-face modifying gestures, and because e-mail tends to be more terse than "old-fashioned" letters, it's easy to perceive slights and sarcasm, when none is intended. Cut the sender some slack.

7. Can the laughter. There's a tendency to use humor inappropriately -- and ineffectively -- when things get tense. "Humor is tricky," says Heloise, "so I'd advise against a jokey 'Our dog ate your invoice' apology." The two key words when dealing with errors are simple and sincere.

8. Don't adopt an overly formal tone. While avoiding inappropriate humor, don't erase all traces of pleasantness. An amusing turn of phrase, a light-hearted observation and a gracious compliment are always appropriate -- and welcome.

9. Use "emoticons" and abbreviations sparingly. A "smiley face" can indeed be useful and effective on occasion, but see if your correspondent replies in kind. If not, drop the practice. Ditto with standard e-mail abbreviations. As a courtesy, write them out in brackets on first-time use.

10. Include only relevant return text. When responding to a message, cut out everything that doesn't pertain -- unless a full record of the discussion is essential.

11. Send a sincere sign-off. Yes, the recipient knows it's you -- but, no, don't just scurry off after you have your say. A proper sign-off is not an antiquated amenity -- it signals, "All done!"

12. Know when to switch mediums. If your correspondent sounds seriously upset -- and you haven't had a voice-to-voice in a while -- pick up the phone. In this day and age, "It's charming to actually get a call," says Heloise. Like music, your voice can be used to soothe and satisfy and stamp out any e-mail problems.

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