How To Help Your Baby Get Great Sleep

Ranked #880 in Parenting & Kids, #28,221 overall

Healthier Sleep Habits = Happier Child. Here's a Way to Help Your Baby, Toddler or Older Child Develop Great Sleep for a Lifetime

Sleeping like a baby. Ha! Before I was a parent, I never knew how ironic that saying was. While many newborns sleep a lot, it's in fits and starts. A few friends had babies who slept most of the night at only a few weeks or months old, but I was not one of those extremely fortunate people. If you're here to learn about healthy sleep habits, I'm guessing that you're not one of those lucky parents either.

While there's a lot of sleep advice flying around out there, and a number of schools of thought on how to help babies (and older children) sleep better, the one I found most helpful seemed to be the most researched one as well. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child was a book that made my life as a new parent (and my daughter's life as a young baby) a lot easier. While some people think that Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child is all about making your baby 'cry it out', it's actually more about paying attention to your baby and her tiredness cues and teaching her how to self-soothe in ways that don't eliminate crying, but keep it to a minimum.

I really appreciated how practical this book is, and I hope that you and your family benefit from it as well.

Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/jm_photos/1800772115/

So what does this book address?

A consise, helpful summary in the publisher's words

The resource that I've found to be the most helpful by far in this endeavor has been the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth, an American pediatrician affiliated with the Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago, has been practicing for more than 30 years. His extensive research on sleep disorders in children has revealed that daytime sleep is as important as nighttime sleep for young infants and toddlers. As a mom trying to help my baby start off her sleep rhythms in a healthy way, it was extremely valuable to me to have a pediatric sleep expert address lots of common sleep problems and teach parents how to help their children form good sleep habits within the framework of their child's natural sleep cycles.

  • Outlines the best course of action for sleep problems: prevention and treatment

  • Reveals the common mistakes parents make to get their children to sleep

  • Explores the different sleep cycle needs for different temperaments

  • Helps you stop the crybaby syndrome, nightmares, bedwetting, and more

  • Analyzes ways to get your baby to fall asleep -- naturally


  • Plus the following new material

  • How to handle 'nap resistant' kids and when to start sleep training

  • Focuses on 'night sleep' and 'day sleep' (naps)

  • Help for working moms and children with sleep issues

  • Expanded discussion on the father's role in comforting children

  • Key studies on how early sleep troubles can lead to later problems

  • The benefits and drawbacks of allowing kids to sleep in 'the family bed'


  • Rest is vital to your child's health, growth and development. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child outlines proven strategies that ensure good, healthy sleep for every age.

    photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/abbybatchelder/4099108126/

    How does this work in real life?

    How Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child helped my baby and I

    As a first-time mom with a newborn, I had no idea what was good for my daughter's sleep. All I knew was that she slept on and off during the day and it took us seemingly forever to get her to fall asleep at night. The process of getting her to fall asleep was a long session of rocking, swaddling and shushing that wore us both out. I was getting severely sleep-deprived, and started looking for resources to help. A good friend recommended Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child (HSHHC) and I was thrilled to see there was a 'how to use this book' section at the beginning that pointed a half-awake mommy in the right direction.

    HSHHC guided me in putting my good intentions for my child's well-being into practice, and has been my main resource for sleep training. One key concept to internalize, though, for this and any other child sleep book is to remember that you and your child are not a book; you're real people for whom not everything may be the best fit. You know your child, so carefully determine where there are places that would be more beneficial to deviate from 'the program.' In my case, my wise pediatrician offered some other suggestions that were key in molding my sleep training process even more specifically to my daughter's very alert and determined personality.

    Like Dr. Weissbluth suggests, I started paying attention to my baby's 'drowsy signals' and started soothing her to sleep at appropriate times where she'd be most likely to fall asleep easily. At three months old, I put her down in her crib drowsy but awake for about ten minutes or so. If she didn't fall asleep or was really upset, I picked her up and soothed her all the way to sleep. By the time she was 5 months old, my daughter would fall asleep in her crib on her own the vast majority of the time. She usually played or cooed for a little while then drifted off to her naps or bedtime.

    While some children start sleeping through the night on their own, my baby did not. At 8 months old, she was still waking up once or twice a night to nurse, sleeping for 6 hours in a row maximum. (for the sake of this story, 'sleeping through the night' will mean sleeping at least 10 hours in a row.) After careful consideration, my husband and I decided to try the method Dr. Weissbluth describes as 'extinction,' the one that has some of the least amount of crying overall. When my daughter woke up in the middle of the night, we let her cry, and she finally put herself back to sleep. It was so hard to listen to her in there, but the next night she just fussed for a short time before going back to sleep. The third night, she slept through the night. After that, she consistently woke up happy and fell asleep on her own with little to no fussing at all.

    At first I thought that putting my child down for bed later would equal her sleeping later, but as HSHHC mentions, this really is not the case. Earlier bedtimes usually equal more sleep, and that proved itself in our experience. In protecting our baby's early bedtime of 7:15PM, I ran into a lot of people who asked why we didn't take her out to more evening activities, commenting that keeping her up will just make her sleep later. We tried that, and all we got was a crabby, tired child the next day. In talking with other parents, I've found more and more of them have the same experience as we've had, and understand why we protected our baby's early bedtime for the vast majority of nights.

    Sometimes my daughter woke up really early, and when that happened for several mornings in a row, we've found the suggestions from HSHHC very helpful....not going in to get our baby before 6AM, and trying a slightly earlier bedtime for the next few nights. It took patience to help get her sleeping in longer, but it was worth it.

    What is the biggest sleep challenge your child is dealing with?

    Doesn't take as many naps as he/she needs

    2 points

    Bedtime battles - it's tough to get him/her to go to sleep at a reasonable hour

    2 points

    Getting out of bed

    1 point

    Naps are too short

    0 points

    Doesn't sleep through the night

    0 points

    Wakes up grumpy

    0 points

    Dealing with social schedule and sleep

    My daughter's biggest problem is having to sleep a more...0 points

    I'm intrigued, but I need some more detail. Is what I'm looking for covered in this book?

    The topics you can expect to learn about in Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. Dr. Weissbluth is very thorough.

    Here's a chapter by chapter summary
    1. Why Healthy Sleep Is So Important

    2. Healthy Sleep and Sleep Strategies

      Healthy Sleep -- sleep duration, naps, sleep consolidation, sleep schedule, timing of sleep, sleep regularity, sleep positions, SIDS, the benefits of healthy sleep: sleep patterns, intelligence, learning and school performance.

      Sleep Strategies -- drowsy signs, soothing to sleep, resources for soothing, bedtime routines, breast-feeding versus bottle-feeding and family bed versus crib, breast-feeding the fussy baby, solid foods and feeding habits, solutions to help your child sleep better: "no cry," "maybe cry," or "let cry", prevention versus treatment of sleep problems, action plans for exhausted parents


    3. Sleep Problems and Solutions -- disturbed sleep; sleep log; morning wake-up time is too early; morning nap is absent, too short, too long, or at the wrong time; afternoon nap is absent, too short, too long or at the wrong time; third nap is absent, too short, too long or at the wrong time; needs two but can get only one; needs a nap but refuses to nap; bedtime is too late: sometimes or always a battle; night waking, difficulty staying asleep; more than one child creates bedtime problems; unable to fall asleep; afraid of the dark or being alone; will not stay in his crib or bed; will not sleep anywhere else; only one bedroom; transition from family bed to crib; action plan for exhausted parents

    4. Sleep, Extreme Fussiness/Colic and Temperament -- how to use this chapter; introduction, sleep and extreme fussiness/colic; temperament at four months; connecting sleep, extreme fussiness/colic and temperament; postcolic: preventing sleep problems after four months of age; summary and action plan for exhausted parents

    5. Months One to Four

      Newborn: the first week
      Weeks two to four: more fussiness
      Weeks five to six: fussiness/crying peaks
      Weeks seven to eight: earlier bedtimes and longer night sleep periods develop
      Months three to four: extreme fussiness/colic ends; morning nap develops at 9:00 to 10:00 AM
      Preventing and solving sleep problems
      Action plan for exhausted parents

    6. Months Five to Twelve

      Months five to eight: early afternoon nap develops at 12:00 to 2:00PM; variable Late afternoon nap at 3:00 to 5:00PM
      Month nine: late afternoon nap disappears; no more bottle-feeding at night
      Months ten to twelve: morning nap starts to disappear, but mostly two naps
      Preventing and solving sleep problems: months five to twelve
      Action plan for exhausted parents

    7. Months Thirteen to Thirty-six

      Months thirteen to fifteen: one or two naps
      Months sixteen to twenty-one: morning nap disappears
      Months twenty-two to thirty-six: only a single afternoon nap
      Preventing and solving sleep problems
      Action plan for exhausted parents

    8. Preschool Children

      Years three to six: naps disappear
      Preventing and solving sleep problems
      Action plan for exhausted parents

    9. Schoolchildren and Adolescence

      Years seven to twelve: bedtime becomes later
      Adolescence: not enough time to sleep, especially in the morning
      Preventing and solving sleep problems

    10. Special Sleep Problems -- sleepwalking, sleep talking, night terrors, nightmares, head banging and body rocking, bruxism, narcolepsy, poor-quality breathing (allergies and snoring), hyperactive behavior, seasonal affective disorder, bed-wetting

    11. Special Events and Concerns -- changes with daylight savings time; new sibling; twins, triplets and more; moving; vacations and crossing time zones; frequent illnesses; mother's return to work, home office, dual-career families; adoption; injuries; overweight, exercise and diet; child abuse; atopic dermatitis and eczema

    12. Competent Parents, Competent Child, by Karen Pierce, M.D.

      Self-esteem
      Good-enough parenting
      Development of internal controls
      Saying no helps your child
      My child has sleep problems. What do we do now?
      When other issues get in the way
      Summary

    13. The Pros and Cons of Other Approaches to Sleep Problems

      Proper association with falling asleep (Richard Ferber's Theory)
      Unrestricted breast-feeding and the family bed (William Sears' Theory)
      Summary

    Get Healthy Sleep Habits

    Whether you have one child, a child who is extra fussy or you have twins, Dr. Weissbluth has resources to help you and your child(ren)

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    Important!

    "I love Dr. Weissbluth's philosophy that the most important thing is to have a well-rested family. And fortunately, thanks to this book, most days (and nights) we do!" -- from the foreword by Cindy Crawford

    Book Review of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

    My take on the book as a whole

    Dr. Weissbluth is logical and thorough with his research as well as in how he explains his conclusions and advice in a caring, understanding manner akin to a trusted mentor. While some of the data and explanations were long, I was able to get the big picture fairly easily and felt comforted that the ideas Weissbluth was communicating were grounded in reality, not just his opinion. Is there another child sleep solutions book out there with research backing it up like this one does?

    The book was well-organized and it was easy to find the most pertinent topics that applied to my child's temperament, age and our family's situation. I really appreciated Weissbluth's focus on learning about your child as an individual to help guide him/her to healthy sleep pattern. Additionally, understanding childrens' biological sleep rhythms helped me see that while each child is unique, there are some very common patterns that appear in children with healthy sleep habits.

    I thought that Dr. Weissbluth provided an expert's assessment of different views of 'no cry', 'maybe cry', and 'let cry', including his observations from helping hundreds of families with their childrens' sleep problems. While he definitely has an opinion on the effectiveness of each particular method, in reading this section of the book I didn't feel like Weissbluth was judging anyone for the style of training that they deemed the best fit for their situation.

    Interspersed in the chapters were practical points, reminders, and other helpful advice to help you apply principles to your family's situation. Another valuable feature was the stories from real families about their situations and how the helped their children develop healthy sleep habits with Dr. Weissbluth's guidance. Even if the sleep issue a particular family was dealing with was completely unrelated to my experiences, it still made me feel like I wasn't alone and I was empowered to help my child. The kicker: the 'Action Plans for Exhausted Parents'...how's that for getting right to the point and showing you how to move Weissbluth's ideas from the page to real life.

    Some of the Helpful Principles from the Book

    %u30B9%u30E4%u30B9%u30E4Many people wrongly equate sleep training with 'cry it out'. Instead, Dr. Weissbluth teaches parents about learning your child's natural tendencies and guiding your child in forming even healthier sleep habits. Here's what I found most helpful from the book:

    photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/iandeth/3155629157/
    • 1If you start early with sleep training, you will be well along the path to preventing sleep problems. By early, I don't mean sleep-training a newborn. We waited until our daughter was around 4 months old.
    • 2Respect a young baby's one to two-hour windows of wakefulness during the day. Don't push them to stay awake much longer.
    • 3Watching your child for signs of sleepiness and starting to soothe to sleep before the end of her wakeful period. Watch your child more than your watch.
    • 4Developing a consistent, calming bedtime routine. For us, it was a soothing bath for our daughter, a short book, then a lullaby.
    • 5Respect your child's need to sleep. Try to be home during your child's usual naptimes to enable your child to have their nap on a regular basis. I let my daughter nap in the car sometimes, but I didn't make a habit of it. Having her associate her bed with sleep was helpful and then she didn't depend on motion to help her fall asleep.
    • 6Keeping a sleep log (a general record of when your child is awake or asleep) is a tool help you spot patterns and trends in your child's sleeping if you think there may be a need for a change. It helps you schedule your day better too. :)
    • 7Bedtimes between 6PM and 8PM tend to be the help children not develop sleep problems in the first place. It seems to me that there's lots of societal pressure for kids to have later bedtimes, but it's so much more helpful for your child to go to bed on the earlier end of things.
    • 8You are guiding your child in an age-appropriate nap and bedtime schedule. As you are helping them develop this, your child initially may not cooperate by falling asleep immediately. Don't give up. My advice: go for progress, not perfection. Adults don't fall asleep immediately all the time either.
    • 9Getting up too early may be caused by going to sleep too late. Early bedtimes often prolong night sleep and prevent early wake-ups. I've had so many people tell me to keep my daughter up later so she'll sleep later. It's never worked. Every time I try it, she wakes up at the same time or earlier.
    • 10Sleep begets sleep. This is a true statement. Even though it's not logical, it's biological. I liked this quote, and it's pretty true.

    Healthy Sleep Habits VS. No Cry Sleep Solution

    Tell which methods of sleep training have worked the best for your children, or which one you think is the most helpful.

    NOTE: This is meant to be a robust yet friendly discussion. Please be considerate, mature and non-inflammatory with your comments; whichever side they fall on. If they aren't, they will not be posted. Thanks!

    Whose helping babies sleep method do you most agree with? Dr. Weissbluth (Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child) or Elizabeth Pantley (The No-Cry Sleep Solution)

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    Dr. Weissbluth all the way

    Jessica Hatch says:

    Well I found this book at Barnes& Noble while searching for anything to help me get my son to sleep, at this time he was about 31/2 months. I read through the first part, ( the part that pertained to me at the time) and continued through it as he grew into each stage! This book changed my husband and I's life. When Hayden was 3 weeks old, we found out that he had Acid Reflux. What a nightmare! We nursed and nursed and nursed just for him to puke it right back up, which made everyone in the house's sleep diminish until there was nothing left of anyone. That's all that he wanted to do, around the clock because he wouldn't keep it down, and when he did he would refuse to sleep! I had no Idea what to do, I read website after website, blog after blog, trying to find that magic miracle that would just let me close my eyes for longer than 10 minutes. I read some testimonials on this book but felt like it wouldn't do any better than the rest of these statements and blah blah blah. So I was at Barnes & Noble looking around in the parents educational section looking for help, maybe it was me.. searched and searched... nothing. then as i became frustrated I hurried to put my books away and knocked this book onto the floor! What are the odds. It was meant to be! I immediately came home and got to work! I was determined to make this successful! Something had to work! This was the prayer we had been waiting for! Not Only did Hayden start sleeping through the night he is a brand new boy! We always know when our sleep schedule is slipping off because his entire demeanor changes. He gets testy, throws tantrums, doesn't listen, whines uncontrollably, becomes aggressive, short- attention span, etc. just not pleasant to be around. So we just push for an earlier bed time for a few days work on naps and get back on schedule! So I thank you Dr. W for all of your knowledge and teaching me to be THE MOTHER, and teaching my son to sleep, we would not be sane without you!!!!!

    SquidooMBA says:

    We used Healthy Sleep Habits and loved it. I can't imagine helping our daughter sleep without it. I am not a fan of the no cry method and would highly recommend Dr. Weissbluth's book to any parent.

    Elizabeth Pantley's methods are better

    TheMotherSquid says:

    I refused to try crying-it-out or variations of it. I used some of Pantley's methods, but mostly I came up with my own. I learned my son never cries for no reason (though some may call it it that); There is always an underlying need, and it is usually emotional. I find a way to meet that need, and we are both happy campers sleeping though the night. You just have to get creative. :) It is more work than sleep training, but to me, it is worth it. :)

    thrivingmom says:

    I read both books and dislike what Weissbluth had to say so much that I tossed the book in the trash (honestly, it went right in the garbage). He seems very comfortable with sticking your baby in a crib all alone and shutting the door until they cry themselves to sleep. The Pantley method is not only more sensitive to your baby's needs, but her advice for breaking the latch of a nursing baby before they fall asleep is positively brilliant and help me keep my sanity as a nursing mother with all 3 of my children.

     

    What's Your Take on the Child Sleep Books Out There?

    Vote for the book that you've found the most helpful in helping your child get the best sleep

    The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pantley, William Sears

    The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pantley, William Sears

    A breakthrough approach for a good night's sleep-- more...2 points

    Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth

    Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth

    One of the country's leading researchers updates his more...2 points

    The Baby Sleep Solution: A Proven Program to Teach Your Baby to Sleep Twelve Hours a Night by Suzy Giordano, Lisa Abidin

    The Baby Sleep Solution: A Proven Program to Teach Your Baby to Sleep Twelve Hours a Night by Suzy Giordano, Lisa Abidin

    Suzy Giordano, affectionately known as "The Baby more...0 points

    The Sleepeasy Solution: The Exhausted Parent's Guide to Getting Your Child to Sleep from Birth to Age 5 by Jennifer Waldburger, Jill Spivack

    The Sleepeasy Solution: The Exhausted Parent's Guide to Getting Your Child to Sleep from Birth to Age 5 by Jennifer Waldburger, Jill Spivack

    Two experts who are helping Hollywood's A-list bab more...0 points

    More about Healthy Sleep Habits

    A real-world mom's guide to helping your child sleep well, book reviews, and more backround on Dr. Weissbluth

    Blogger 'Unsolicited Advice''s Getting Through Sleep Problems Guide
    An incredibly realistic account of a mom's helping her child get through some common sleep issues and helping develop good sleep habits. She bases a lot of what she does on 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child', and customizes it to her family. I love this guide and the tips Unsolicited Advice gives. Very real world and down-to-earth.
    Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book review on Blisstree.com
    Review from one of the bloggers on Blisstree.com, a lifestyle site which "provides candid, honest and interesting perspectives and encourages a community for women for all ages."
    Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book review on TheMomCrowd.com
    The articles on The Mom Crowd are written from a "this worked for me" point of view.
    Summary on iVillage
    A short article containing the Dr. Weissbluth's philosophy, what you have to do, what you might like about the technique, drawbacks, and further reading
    Dr. Weissbluth at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago, IL
    Information about Dr. Weissbluth from the Children's Memorial Hospital website

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    So What's Your Take on This?

    Tell how this book has helped your family and share any other resources/tips that have helped your child sleep better. Any other thoughts?

    • MindPowerProofs Apr 10, 2012 @ 5:37 pm | delete
      Thanks for sharing. It can be helpful for my friend who has a 2months old girl
    • TheMotherSquid Apr 6, 2012 @ 8:45 pm | delete
      I would like to see more on the no-cry methods. If you just figure out a way to meet your child's nighttime need (which is often emotional) you can get sleep without crying. Yes, needs change, so there will be a few weeks here and there that you have to find a new, different approach to nighttime, but with a little work, it works just fine!
    • naheedahsan Feb 12, 2012 @ 4:18 am | delete
      Very good info.
    • JoshK47 Jan 31, 2012 @ 2:57 pm | delete
      Great info - awesome work here. Blessed by a SquidAngel!
    • hamshi5433 Nov 16, 2011 @ 8:35 am | delete
      I cant wait to have a baby :D Very useful information.
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    A Mama Who Loves Her Sleep

    Which by default, means she loves her child's good sleep habits too.

    by

    BunnyFabulous

    I'm a mom who loves great sleep for her daughter...and herself.

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