How to Deal with a High-Maintenance Husband

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High-maintenance husbands deserve love too

It's tough being married to someone who requires more attention and more hand-holding than you do--or even your children do. But that doesn't mean that your marriage isn't the best thing to have ever happened to you.

When your high-maintenance husband (HMH) has really pushed the limits, find refuge here on this lens.

We understand you. We can distract you. We might even be able to help you hide the knife.

Totally kidding about that last one there...sort of.

High-maintenance men love leather

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When your HMH is cute and KNOWS it



It's hard to fight with someone who you find so adorable. Unless, of course, he's crossed some sort of invisible line that you just can't believe.

Sometimes there is a visible line that he'll cross too. Like the line between you and the last Diet Coke.

So aggravating.

The next time your adorable husband has really ticked you off and you're concerned that you won't be able to stay mad at his cute little face, try not making eye contact.

There's no better way to avoid this dilemma than by fighting with him over the phone while at work or in the car when he's driving.

Video - A high-maintenance husband moment

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Definition of high maintenance

definition of high maintenance
Usually the term high maintenance is used to describe women. But high maintenance has a meaning for everyone, regardless of age or gender.

Webster's does not give a definition for high maintenance, however, it does define just general ol' maintenance. It means: the upkeep of property and equipment. I guess you can deduce from this that high maintenance means the aggressive upkeeping of property and equipment.

According Wiktionary, which has a much lengthier entry on high maintenance, it means: a person who requires a lot of attention.

Here, here.

Next definition comes from UrbanDictionary.com. This site lists several meanings for high maintenance including this one:

Often a divorced woman with a fake tan, big processed hair (usually blonde) and lots of bling. Very insecure about her looks and requires constant reassurance of her physical beauty. Spends lots of time and money on clothes, shoes, accessories, hair, makeup and beauty treatments. Needs expensive homes, cars, clothes and vacations. Never pays for anything when in the presence of men.

Yes, I suppose this is accurate for some women, but what about those men out there?

I propose this for a definition of high maintenance men.

Often a man in a relationship or looking for a relationship who is a bit preoccupied with his looks. He might grease his hair or have lots of bling, but more importantly he spends an abnormal amount of time looking in the mirror. He requires constant reassurance from his significant other about his physical-ness and spends more time and money on clothes, shoes, accessories, hair, and beauty treatments than most other men you know. A high-maintenance man needs things done in a particular way, to ensure he receives optimum attention at all the times that he feels necessary.

Relationship advice for wives of high-maintenance husbands

No one said it would be easy

For starters, wives of high-maintenance husbands need to stick together. We love them and we aren't leaving them, so why not laugh at them?

Misery (or pretend misery) loves company so I suggest you find friends whom you can trust to rave and rant about the high-maintenance men in your lives.

Second, call your husband out on his high-maintenance ways, but don't try or expect to change. He is who he is who he is. Period.

Last, I'm sure he gives you allowances so indulge some of his high-maintenance tendencies from time to time too. Does he demand that the air conditioning be set at 70 in the morning and 69 in the afternoon regardless of the weather? Let him do it. It makes him happy.

A happy high-maintenance husband means there is a happy wife of a high-maintenance husband.

Tool kit for a wife of a high-maintenance husband

Don't be unprepared. Everything you need for your high-maintenance husband.

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If there were a support group for wives of high-maintenace hubbies...

I'd donate all the funds from this lens to it. But there is no such charity, and I need money to pay for my high-maintenance husband's leather obsession.

Gift ideas for your high-maintenance husband

What does your high-maintenance husband want from his family?

PEPITA - Italian Leather Explorer's Bag, Dark Chestnut

PEPITA - Italian Leather Explorer's Bag, Dark Chestnut

We called this bag PEPITA because it conjures up images more...1 point

Panasonic ER421KC Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer, Wet/Dry, Lighted

Panasonic ER421KC Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer, Wet/Dry, Lighted

MODEL - ER421KC VENDOR- Panasonic Small Appliance more...0 points

Cool Water By Davidoff For Men. Eau De Toilette Spray 4.2 Ounces

Cool Water By Davidoff For Men. Eau De Toilette Spray 4.2 Ounces

COOL WATER by Davidoff for MEN EDT SPRAY 4.2 OZ La more...0 points

Riedel Vinum Single Malt Scotch Glasses, Set of 6

Riedel Vinum Single Malt Scotch Glasses, Set of 6

Crafted with the help of master distillers in Scot more...0 points

100% Silk Woven Brown and Pink Paisley Tie

100% Silk Woven Brown and Pink Paisley Tie

A stunning chocolate brown satin background with a more...0 points

Premium Classic Full Mirror Aviator Sunglasses - 1312 Silver/Mirror

Premium Classic Full Mirror Aviator Sunglasses - 1312 Silver/Mirror

Designer inspired sunglass frame. Get the look for more...0 points

0 points

My Sugar Daddy Diaries: My True Confessions of Dating Older Men. by Helen Croydon by Helen Croydon

My Sugar Daddy Diaries: My True Confessions of Dating Older Men. by Helen Croydon by Helen Croydon

Frustrated with her stalled career as a broadcast more...0 points

Secura Digital Halogen Infrared Turbo Convection Countertop Oven, Deluxe Package w/Extender Ring;Tong;Cook Racks 798DH

Secura Digital Halogen Infrared Turbo Convection Countertop Oven, Deluxe Package w/Extender Ring;Tong;Cook Racks 798DH

Secura digital turbo oven uses infrared heating and more...0 points

Like a metro-sexual ... but different.

He's a family man so he's not out in the clubs trying to impress the ladies with his fashions and nice car, but he is lookin' good.

7 ways you know you have a high-maintenance husband

  1. He doesn't leave the house without you confirming he trimmed his beard absolutely perfect
  2. You have to search for your moisturizer every morning because he never puts it back where it belongs
  3. He wants a man bag for Valentine's Day.
  4. The car is spotless. Always.
  5. He pouts when you won't hold his hand in public.
  6. Your husband won't eat at a restaurant without analyzing the menu first
  7. He changes his outfit more times than you.

A high-maintenance husband's relationship to food

It's 5:27 pm and you notice your hubby grunting a little at the kids. Then just a minute later you see him shove the dog off the couch for no reason. And then, as if in some kind of choreographed feat, he looks at you and says, "Why is it so hot in here? It's always so hot in here. Why can't you just keep the temperature where I left it?"

You'd recognize this behavior anywhere ... he's hungry.

A hungry husband is one I'd rather not have. Not because I take joy in cooking for my man or that I believe that a well-fed tummy will lead to a happier marriage, it's because his hunger makes him cranky.

I got enough grief, the last thing I need is his whining.
hungry_husbands

Why don't you have a snack? I say as I push a bowl of peanuts his way.

No, I don't want that, he retorts.

Drink some water.

I'm not thirsty.

Well, there's nothing I can do for you.

Then the you-know-what really hits the fan and you're in an all out brawl.

Learn from my mistakes. Feed your high-maintenance husband before it's too late.

What bothers you the most about your high maintenance husband?

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Love him like you've never loved before

I talk quite a bit about my high-maintenance husband and how he drives me to drink, but I think I should make one thing clear. I love him. Even when I'm wasted.high maintenance husband

We actually have a great relationship full of communication and affection and respect. He knows all about my Squidoo lens and my blog posts, and in true HMH style he says: "As long as you can make some money doing this, you can write whatever you want...just make sure my hair looks nice in the photos."

Yeah...about that honey, you have no hair.

Anyway, my point is that as much as I rant about his eating habits, his cute little glares, and annoying tantrums, I do love him and encourage all of you love your high-maintenance husbands too.

Being an HMH can be a little endearing. Just admit it.

Do you have a high-maintenance husband and want to share your tips for tolerance?

We love em', but we need support here people.

  • margfow Sep 27, 2011 @ 11:25 am | delete
    Give him the ultimate gift, a skin care system that works. SigmaSkin
  • margfow Sep 27, 2011 @ 11:25 am | delete
    Give him the ultimate gift, a skin care system that works. SigmaSkin
  • jgelien Nov 20, 2009 @ 8:38 am | delete
    Well I can certainly identify with the food part. Mine's always hungry and eating but never gains weight. That's just wrong! Love your lens.
  • EclecticWAHM Aug 5, 2009 @ 11:15 pm | delete
    Love it! What a fun lens!
  • BigGirlBlue Jul 11, 2009 @ 11:21 am | delete
    I had no idea I had a HMH until I read this. The egg video was funny too.
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SaraMu

I am a writer, blogger, and marketing consultant from Denver, Colorado with aspirations for universal fame as a fiction writer. more »

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