Holiday Tips For Special Needs Kids

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With Family Members - Give family members a "heads up" by explaining things ahead of time. Discuss your child's specific needs, and gently but firmly tell them what your plans are. Be sure to let them know that this will make the whole experience better for everyone. Ask for their support.

With their help and understanding, everything can go much more smoothly. Avoiding hurt feelings in a family is definitely worth this effort.

With Your Child - Explain things like what you will be doing, where, when, and how long you will be doing those things. Tell them whatever details they need to know to adjust to the idea. Giving them advanced warning can help them prepare mentally.

Let them know what you expect from them, how you want them to behave, and what the consequences will be if they don't. Remind them of all of these things a few times before the day(s) of the festivities.

Remain Calm - Repeat it over and over in your head whenever you feel yourself losing your cool: I do not have to apologize for being a good parent to my child. We may struggle under the weight of "advice" or disapproval from family members, but our kids don't care about that: They need what they need. You know best what your child needs, and providing it is your responsibility.

Since most children with special needs react badly to stress in their environment, particularly stressed-out parents, staying relaxed and low-key is one of the best things you can do to keep your child's behavior in line. You can always throw a tantrum when you get home.

Don't Overbook - Hold the festivities down to one event per holiday. Don't hop from house to house, or plan a big outing the night before a family event.

Be Alert - Keep an eye out for trouble brewing, and take breaks when needed. Even if it's just to have a quiet minute in a room away from the noise and decorations. This frequent contact can also help your child to feel more secure.

Fill a backpack with things your child finds comforting or enjoys playing with - toy cars, a stuffed animal, a CD and CD player, or a few books. Having them available, even if he/she doesn't actually play with them, may have a calming effect on your child.

If your child gets overstimulated, find a quiet corner or a back room and pull out the backpack. Who knows, maybe you even need a quiet moment that does not involve long conversations with unpleasant relatives!

JanSport Classic Big Student Backpack

JanSport Big Student Classic daypack, is a large capacity pack. It will easily hold enough to get your child through the day in its two main compartments.

It also has a front pocket with an organizer to store your necessary gadgets and music player, and a headphone cord port. Other features include an upper zippered accessory pocket, and a lower front zippered stash pocket.

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Better to leave before things go bad than "tough it out" and end up regretting it!

A Home Other than Yours:

Arrange a time limit or a signal ahead of time and observe it - even if it means missing the pumpkin pie!

Everyone having a good time, and your child is coping better than expected? Go ahead and extend the deadline, but be ready to split at a moment's notice.

If your holiday travels involve an stay overnight, get a hotel room. Your child (and you) will need someplace quiet and chaos-free to decompress after the day.

For Your Home:

Everybody gathering at your house for dinner? Then make your child's room off-limits to everybody but him/her.

Encourage your child to use their room as a refuge when things get overwhelming.

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Whether you are celebrating the holidays at home this year, or at a relative's house, knowing what is on the menu beforehand can save you headaches at the meal table.

Always make sure that there is something your child will eat on the menu (even if you bring it yourself!).

The goal of the day isn't about them cleaning their plate, trying out new foods, or making the cook happy. It's about getting through the meal with a minimum of stress, for everyone attending. It's about being grateful for what we have and giving thanks.

If your child wants to give thanks for pizza, so be it.

For kids with sensitivities to certain types of clothing, or for those who insist on wearing their favorite sweat suit to the family gathering, why not let them dress themselves for the day?

While your mother-in-law may find their attire inappropriate, is it worth starting the day off with a battle that will only add to your stress and their anxiety? Worrying about what they're wearing, or putting them in clothes that you know will cause fuss, is a bad way to start.

Think about it this way, you'll be the only parent at the table who's not worrying about ruined outfits when the inevitable spills occur!