Survive the Holidays, Zen-Style! Ohhhmm...

Top 10 Relaxation Tips

Before you get all wound up, lets set some ground rules...Your gonna love this part!

1. Make time to relax! I know, I know, there is so much to do, and if you're not doing it you're thinking about doing it. To relax you need to give yourself permission, to grant yourself a little time in which to practice. But it sure beats a heart attack! It also beats anxiety and exhaustion. Don't waste your precious life on feeling exhausted. Fifteen minutes a day of relaxation practice can help a lot.
2. Carry a small notebook with you everywhere and leave it next to your bed at night. Even have it with you when you're practicing to relax. Jot down anything that occurs to you that needs to be done. Go through the list now and then. Cross off what you really don't need to do, and you'll feel lighter. Then as you work your way through the list check off what you've done, and you'll feel more in control of your life.
3. Sleep! If you have trouble sleeping, you've already tried various techniques. Here are some that worked for me. Before trying to sleep do something you love to do and don't have time for during the day. I love to read in bed, so I always do that for at least half an hour before I sleep. I feel like I've given myself a gift, and that feeling is warm and good and relaxing.
   
   Dab pure lavender oil on your temples, your pillow, wherever it will waft into your senses. You only need the tiniest amount. Or burn pure aromatherapy relaxation or lavender candles in your bedroom before bed.
   
   Keep that notebook next to your bed for jotting down stray emergency thoughts!
   
   Sometimes I place an eye pillow over my eyes to help me drift off. There's something soothing about the cool soft weight and the lavender scent.
   
   Keep the heat turned down, adjust the light the way you like it, and let go. Yes, just like that.
4. When you get home from work, take fifteen minutes for yourself. Put the kids somewhere safe; you'll work something out! Tell your spouse you'll talk in fifteen minutes, and retreat.
   
   Lie flat on your back (I prefer the floor), in a yoga position called shavarsana. First, bring your knees up so that your lower back touches the floor. Lower your legs straight out and your back will be in a good position for relaxing. Let your feet flop outwards, have your arms a little out from your sides with the palms facing up. Tilt your head forward a little, so that your neck is in a relaxed position. Now go through your whole body mentally, focusing your attention on one area at a time. Think "relax" at each area. Start with one foot: the sole of the foot, the top of the foot, the ankle, the front of the calf, the back of the calf, and so on. Then the other leg. Then the abdomen, the buttocks, the lower back. You get the idea. For your arms, start with your fingers and work your way up. Finish with the throat, the back of the neck, the jaw, nostrils, eyelids, temples and forehead.
   
   Someone might have to wake you up, but you'll be very relaxed! And good company for the rest of the evening.
5. Try open-eyed meditation. One way of doing this is by gazing softly (not staring) at a candle flame. Darken the room, light a candle, sit comfortably and gaze at the flame. The aim is to have a focus for the mind. So when your mind wanders, gently bring your attention back to the flame. Calming the mind is the basis of all relaxation techniques, and that's why you'll feel warm and relaxed after doing the exercise.
6. The home spa! Of course, the real thing is fantastic, but we're talking about everyday life here. Again, it's all about giving yourself permission both to give yourself time, and to give yourself something pleasurable.
   
   First step: set aside the time. Second step: arrange for no interruptions for an hour. Third step: take all the paraphernalia you need, go into the bathroom and close the door.
   
   Okay, now you can do whatever you want! I suggest putting the music on first. Then arrange your candles and light them. Turn off the electric light. Start the bath running. Add aromatherapy bath salts or bubble bath and breathe deeply of the fragrant steam. Give your skin whatever treatments you like, and finish up with a soothing face mask. Turn off the water and step into the tub. Lie down. Sigh! Close your eyes and let your thoughts drift.
   
   It's almost impossible to worry while lying in hot water, breathing in fragrant steam, with candle light dancing all around and soft music playing.
   
   When you can bring yourself to step out of the tub, rub soothing cream all over your body (unless you have a personal masseur to do it for you). Mmm. Maintain that feeling.
7. Relaxation techniques are not just for the time you do them. It doesn't help if you step out of the bathroom after your spa and yell at the kids. All these techniques give you practice and an experience of what you're after all the time. It all takes practice. You feel very calm after meditating; so hold on to that feeling as you go about your regular life. You feel as relaxed as a rag doll after you've lain on the floor and relaxed your entire body, so keep the feeling with you. Don't let things get to you. If you notice the stress building up, remember that relaxed feeling, and act from there.
8. Have fun. Have physical fun. Do things with your body. In my case, when I'm told I SHOULD do something (even when I'm the one doing the telling!) I get rebellious, and I resist doing it. So I tell myself I COULD. I COULD go for a stroll after dinner. I COULD join a tap dancing class with my friend. I COULD join a Tae Kwon Do class with my daughter (and I did!). So give yourself permission to choose. Because when you do allow your body to get physical it does feel so good!!!
9. Do what you love. Don't let your life go by without following your dreams. When you love what you do, it's a kind of relaxation. And you're not burdened by the stress of unfulfilled dreams. Even if you can't live your dreams all the time, at least make time for them. That can be enough. And then it's very possible that you will learn to love what you must do.
10. And finally, and very importantly, make time for your friends and family. Never let your work come before those you love. Always be there for your loved ones. Consider the broad view to see where your deepest satisfaction lies, and live your life with no regrets.