How To Plan A Party

Here is a very honest and frank boiling down of the different types of parties. The slant is very different from the usual. Extremely practical "first steps" are given, in regard to how to plan a party. These may be steps and ideas for parties that you would never think of on your own. Later in the article, the main key to a fun and sane party is given to you.

This article is about how to plan a party for adults, but I want to explore also ideas for parties, that we can learn from observing children's parties and comparing them to adult parties. It is going to be a fun exploration, and we will learn from it how to have more and better fun at parties.

The Purpose Of Your Party -- And For Whom Will You Give It?

Here are some commonly found reasons for giving parties:

1. To be with people -- Nearly all parties are about being with people. There can be exceptions. I read a book by a spiritualist who taught folks how to have parties with just you and a gathering of spirits.

I suppose that animals have parties, in a sense, also. If you study animal behavior, you can probably single out events that could be defined as parties. And thirdly, a person could theoretically have a party where all the guests would be animals. But this article is about people-parties.

2. For folks who want to become drunken -- Anybody who wants to become drunken is a born alcoholic. Regular folks do not have the deviant type of liver and brain with which alcoholics are born. Regular people want to quit after 2 or 3 drinks.

If you follow the lives of folks, who want to become drunken, for years after the party, I tell you what you will find. This is from the experience of many recovered alcoholics. Either they totally quit drinking, or they die from alcohol related causes, or they get locked up, or they become so sick or crippled that they can't leave their room.

Drunken parties can include also guests who are not drunks. The first step in giving a drunken party is to see to it that anything sharp, inflammable, valuable, or breakable is put away, where the guests won't have any contact with it.

It will probably help to have mats or cushions covering any hard corners or places where folks could hurt themselves if they fall. Also, to be a good host or hostess, if you care about your guests, you will want to see to it that every drunk has a designated driver whereupon to rely.

3. For folks who want to "get laid" -- This could be anything from an orgy, to a "wild party", to a calm, serene "singles party". It would also include swingers, threesomes, and so on. Truly often, it is the non-recovered alcoholic who has no respect for the sexual partner, and, so, becomes linked in temporary or unnatural relationships. But this is also to be found among "regular" -- that is to say, non-alcoholic -- folks as well.

It is common for this kind of party to involve drunks, but it is not wholly needful. I, personally, would have given a party of this type, when I was immature. But, now that I am mature, I wouldnt' even think of it.

But if you are thinking on how to plan a party of this type, if it is to be a medium- to large-sized party, with strangers invited, then one of the first steps would be to see to it that the number of guests exceeds the amount of space available, and that there is small lighting. You probably don't want it to be totally dark, but neither do you want it to be bright.

4. To preserve or to improve one's status or rank in social or business circles -- The nature of these parties depends upon the nature and present status of the folks who give the party. In some cases, for example for immature high school or college hosts and hostesses, a "wild party" might be perceived as improving their social esteem. They might have the chance to hook up with guests, who would be good contacts in their future adult life.

The first step that I would offer, in this case, is to make a list of the exact, specific individuals whom you want to impress, or with whom you want to make contact. Do some research, and find out what exactly impresses them, and build your party around that.

For staid, mature, practical, and established adults, the same advice would apply, but the "wild party" would not be an option.

5. Just to have fun -- becoming drunken, getting laid, and status or rank are not considerations. I remember my first birthday party. It was the most fun party whereto ever I went. There was no alcohol, no sex, just several one-year-olds sitting around a table, and their mothers supervising and talking.

There was no theme, no conversation, there was only one thing -- love. If you want to learn how to give the most fun parties, then you will learn all about how to love.

Now there is a teacher called "Prem Rawat", and he said that children don't need toys -- they need love. I believe that this applies also to adults. I believe it also applies to children's party themes, and also themed parties for adults. If you have enough love, then you don't need themes and props.

I said "don't need them". But does that mean that you shouldn't use them? Themes and props can be used as "jumping off points" to express love. But remember, it's the love that makes the party fun. All the other methods are only substitutes for love. But if you like a theme, or if you like a toy or a game, use it.

Let's check out the most mature and sane adult parties. What are they? They consist of conversation, possibly quiet music, possibly food, and possibly moderate drinking of alcohol. How does this differ from my first birthday party? In the first place, we had to be supervised, because we were too young to be competent. Many adults need to be supervised, but they have no supervision, and, so, they give immature, insane parties.

Another difference is alcohol. From pre-birth until the age of 35, the body is in a stage of development. Any alcohol taken by the expectant mother, or, later by the child or early adult, has a destructive effect on the developmental process. You hear folks saying "Well, I turned out o.k.!" My answer is, "Yes, but not as good as you could have been, if you had waited til age 35 before drinking."

So how to plan a party the sane, mature, adult way -- you may have moderate drinking of alcohol; any harm in it would be so slight as to be negligible. But for the child, the harm would be great, if he were to be given a drink.

From all the above, I would say that the first step to plan an adult party, just for fun, would be to make a guest-list of folks who are mature, sane, and filled with love.

When will be the next party?

Here is that, which I found, in the Online Etymological Diction-ary, under the word, "party": "late 13c., "part, portion, side," from O.Fr. partie 'a part, a party' (12c.), lit. 'that which is divided,' from fem. pp. of partir 'to divide'"

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