If I Was A Reindeer

Just found out that Reindeer Poop is actually a recipe...whoa! Now I know the paranoia wasn't just my anxiety...somebody was following me on my potty trips! Discreetness obviously did not matter, now my excrement is bagged, written about, and favored by these fools! Ha, ha if they get the one from my trip down to the poison oak field!

Reindeer Poop Poem - Front
On My Zazzle Store

Mama warned me about wandering - well we know how that goes?! Left anyway and tripped onto a bunch of wild people - they call me a wild animal...snort! Anyway long story to short I somehow got tangled up, got away and headed straight home to mama! Confused...heart racing as I headed into the center of the herd, the laughter drowned out my fears! In my panic I had no clue there was a President Nixon mask planted perfectly over my snout...as a memory reminder I'm called "The Fem Prez". It's a given the big boys in the herd are really The Prez though, so it's mighty fun to prance around about it now and again!

For the first time in years I ventured back to the neighborhood with, God rest her soul, my mama's words echoing in my head. This time had me laughing my fluffy tail off! In fact, I spewed juniper berries all over the place when I saw 'the dog' dressed up like me. I think he actually wanted to bite someone though. Poor domesticated fella just stood there. Fess up: noticed the glint in his eye - he wanted to run into the woods with me...maybe someday I'll come back and take him on an adventure! I think the poor thing needs some excitement in his life!

Have to admit this buck has really given us reindeer a good name! That's a good thing when so many people can be afraid of us just because of our size. Rudy - as he is known in his herd - put the fun back in Christmas, lights up the room where ever he goes, is just an all around good old buck! Hearin' that his story is still famous today - right on for Rudy! A little known secret: There was a bit of fluff added to the story - the producer's insisted, Rudy's agent just went along! Guess it didn't hurt him none!