The Introspective Personality

As a child, my introspective personality manifested outwardly as shyness. I was very uncomfortable 'on the stage of life' because the inner realms of reflection were more peaceful, and easier to understand. Over stimulation could make me physically ill as a child; I was overly sensitive to getting enough sleep and rest. The first day of kindergarten I asked to go to the bathroom and walked home without saying anything to the teacher because I was itchy all over and I couldn't express what was happening. I just knew I had to get out of there and back to my own inner state. In hindsight, I think it was just too much for me to suddenly make the transition to the outer world of school and it's demands and expectations. My aversion to extroversion has manifested as bodily hives more than a few times over the years- hives seem to be a good excuse to go home.
As an introverted child, there was this sense of angst concerning the protection of my own subjective reality. I recall I could feel threatened if people were too physically close; they might do something excessive and shocking to the sensitive person within. People are unpredictable; the internal world is predictable. While I loved academics I never liked the social aspect of school and spent a lot of time with the school flu. Somehow I still got honors grades- but that could be because I wasn't playing hooky to go outside, but to go within. In grade one I spontaneously got up out of my seat to help another child with her hand up, and the teacher promptly whacked me on the head with a heavy hardcover text. I left then too. As an introspective personality, I didn't know how things in the outer world worked as well as I did in the inner world. There was no one on the inside who might hit me on the head for being in the incorrect position. School can be a confusing place for the introspective personality, because in general, the school system does not promote time for reflection as it does kinesthetic, auditory and visual learning.

It can be especially tough on extroverts to raise an introverted child (not to mention tough on the introverted child). The extrovert craves attention, activity and stimulation in order to feel a sense of aliveness. The introvert craves connection with the inner reflective space of contemplation, or they feel disconnected from the source of life itself. I get anxious if I feel as if I can't shut the body down, if it must continue to operate in a certain manner without reprieve to inner sanctums. For instance, I could never work in customer service because I'd give up and go home then too. I would not enjoy interacting with people in a subtle and not so subtly confrontational manner. While the extroverted personality may go looking for crisis and chaos to stimulate their minds and systems, the introvert avoids those very situations. The constant presence of conversation and interaction can be draining for the introverted personality. If you are caring for an introverted child, make sure the child isn't pressured to perform and that the child has plenty of time allocated to reading, writing and other quiet activities. Give the introverted extra time to answer questions and to interact in general. I remember considering a question an adult had asked for months until I saw them again. By the time I gave my answer though, they'd completely forgotten they'd asked the question. My feelings were hurt- because somehow, I'd thought the question mattered more than it really did. Introverted children often place great importance on what is asked of them, because they believe the speaker is describing their own internal reality, as an introvert would. Introverted personalities generally don't speak just for the fun of speaking, but when there is deeper meaning to be conveyed. Extroverts are generally describing external reality vs subjective internal reality. This is where extroverted parents with introverted children can clash- often there are two different worlds with expectations, demands, and values being described. Be especially clear with your introverted child when you are speaking in abstract terms, because they will internalize what is said literally, and question it repeatedly to discover its level of truth to them.