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RebelPilot Issue 69

1 - I can do better 2 - Jury's out 3 - Pretty darn good 4 - Splendiferous 5 - Awesometastic (by 0 people)   Your rating: 1 - I can do better 2 - Jury's out 3 - Pretty darn good 4 - Splendiferous 5 - Awesometastic

Ranked #4833 in Movies & TV, #136985 overall

Rated G. (Control what you see)

EPISODE LXIX - Fett Spectacular

 

VADER: ...there will be a substantial reward for the one who finds the sender of these RebelPilot issues. You are free to use any methods necessary, but I want him alive. No disintegration's.

BOBA FETT: As you wish... but I'll hold off until he's posted the Fett Spectacular.

The Fett Issue 

Trying something a little different for this edition. An entire issue dedicated to Boba Fett. So let's get on with the show...

Humour 

Not every one is enamoured with the galaxies most feared bounty hunter. Here's some remarks from someone batting with the other team. I thought I'd get them out of the way from the start. Expect the author to mysteriously disappear:

TEN REASONS TO CLOG BOBA FETT ON THE HEAD

10. When do you think was the last time he washed that armor?

9. Because

8. He's a dip

7. Dumb voice

6. For pete sakes! He has a street lamp for a helmet!

5. His ship looks like a flying tea kettle

4. He brought Han to Jabba the Hutt

3. It would be fun

2. For getting out of the Sarlacc alive

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON TO CLOG BOBA FETT ON THE HEAD IS

1. In hope of knocking him unconscious, which might put him in a coma and would never have to hear about him again.

©2000 Elizabeth (EErinD)

Official Casting 

Jimmy Smits is confirmed to play Bail Organa in Episode II.

 

Star Wars - The Saga Collection - Basic Figure - Boba Fett

Amazon Price: $16.01 (as of 10/12/2008)

Official News 

Boba Fett WILL be in Episode II.

Cross Promotion 

I've gotta let you all in on a little secret.

I've been working closely with the people behind that OTHER ezine; TK421.

TK421 is a lot like RebelPilot, except it has imperial leanings. RebelPilot SOUNDS like it's Rebel propaganda but while we do cheer for the winners it serves up a bit of everything.

So don't go calling me a traitor because of my TK421 connections.

TK421 was one of many spin-offs from the RebelPilot franchise...

Sorry, I've always wanted to brandish big words like that and sound like a corporate big wig.

Where was I? . . .

TK421 started because of RebelPilot. One of many to do so. And it's all grown up now and has itself over 400 subscribers.

It's pretty much like RebelPilot, with the news, humour and lo and behold- ASCII ART.

It's featured a lot ASCII Art that I made, some never seen before in RebelPilot. But now there's a few TK421 readers coming through the ranks and creating some imperial ascii.

The ezine has also got itself a new editor. Something which saw me yet again pull some strings and put in the position our very own Irreverent Jedi.

He's settled into the position quite comfortably and has written some great stuff (from an imperial point of view of course) and will soon score an interview for the ezine with R A Salvatore. The writer of not only Vector Prime but also has recently signed the contract to do the novelisation for Episode II.

All in all the ezine is a worthy addition in your inbox. I recommend it. If only for the ASCII Art :)

And talking about ASCII Art... the next issue will have itself a special Star Park style ASCII of a Stormtrooper. A faithful ascii rendition of something I'm working on for the other side called Imperial Park.

TK421 is a fortnightly ezine. You can subscribe by sending a blank email to tk421-subscribe@yahoogroups.com they'll have themselves a website up soon. At the moment they have a temporary one at http://www.geocities.com/imperialemployee

News Flash 

NEWS FLASH: LUCASFILM HAS SENSE OF HUMOR

The lads over at starwars.com have dug themselves up a picture from A New Hope to coincide with the news that Jimmy Smits will be playing Bail Organa in Episode II.

Bail Organa as seen in Episode IV
http://www.starwars.com/episode-ii/characters/bail_organa.html

Website Review 

bobafettfanclub.com

The Boba Fett Fan Club has itself a Jeremy Bulloch connection. You can post questions to the actor who played Boba Fett in the trilogy.

It also has a lot of other things to do with Fett. As well as the latest casting rumours:

Temuera Morrison: The latest from the spy reports announcing that this New Zealander has something to do with Boba Fett. He recently appeared in Pitch Black.

Robbie Bulloch: Still young and skilled, the son of the original Boba Fett has yet to be formally offered the role. He has been recommended by Jeremy Bulloch at conventions around the world.

Jeremy Bulloch: The original actor with just as much talent and energy as the first day of filming in 1980.

Jet Li: While officially announced to be unconsidered for the role of Boba Fett, the Hong Kong action superstar is a fan favorite nevertheless. His next role is in Matrix 2.

Check out this and more at www.bobafettfanclub.com

Humour 

Top Ten Boba Fett Childhood Memories

Being the only kid brave enough to go into Vaders yard after the baseball, and finding out he's actually a nice guy.

Going out with Dad to blow up deadbeats.

"These Hunters today...when I was a boy, we didn't have these fancy Stolkhi spraynets and personal forcefields, why, in my day, we had to bring down Jedi Knights with only a toothpick and a Kleenex!"

When a bounty decided to try to get away, I killed him. Little did I know that it was my own mother..... the poster said, no disintigrations. I didn't get paid for that one.......

The bully at school kept on picking on me, telling me that with a name like "Boba" I'd never get anywhere. Well, a name like "Greedo" didn't get him much, now, did it?

Hunting down dad's lost keys... and demanding 10,000 credits for them

Playing kick the thermal detonator with all the other Journeyman Protector trainees.

The time he tried to jump off the roof with his "jetpack" and broke his leg.

Finding out that beating the stuffing out of bullies only got him in trouble, while turning them in brought many rewards.

When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard really.

Putting his Han Solo action figure in the freezer, then asking his dad for money in exchange for it's safe return.

©2000 Various. Written by the visitors of TheForce.Net.
Walter Danek, Jediphile, Ael, Michael McKinley, Matt Hallaron, Andrew Sparkmon, John Bambenek, J. Orcadi, Timothy W. Smyth, Paladin

Website Review 

slaveone.com

This site is brilliant!

If only for the art gallery which has no less than 50 fett pics.

But there's loads more other stuff as well.

Check out the site here: www.slaveone.com

Casting Couch 

Who would you like to see play Boba Fett in Episode II?

Bruce Willis: See "The Jackal", and you'll see Bruce playing Boba Fett. Actually Fett's not an assassin, but I think the way BRuce's character was portrayed is a good example of how Fett should be played.

Kev Bayer

 

Boba Fett Helmet

Amazon Price: $88.99 (as of 10/12/2008)

Cease & Desist 

bobafett.com

On my journeys around the world wide web checking out fett inspired site I visited www.bobafett.com

There isn't much happening there but you'll get that if you're in the process of closing down your site.

And it seems the only thing more dangerous or efficient than Boba Fett in hunting down prey and collecting pelts as trophies is the lawyers from Lucasfilm.

bobafett.com has received a letter almost exactly worded as the one for tatooine.com. And the owner of the site has also posted it for the world to see.

(You can see the site owners response at www.bobafett.com or perhaps I'll get permission to post it in the next issue.)
  • LUCASFILM LTD.
    P.O. Box 2009, San Rafael, California 94912-2009

    June 15, 2000

    VIA ELECTRONIC MAIL
    VIA CERTIFIED MAIL

    Re: Unauthorized Use of Trademarks and Copyrighted Property -- www.bobafett.com

    Dear Mr. Proctor:

    Lucasfilm Ltd. is the sole and exclusive owner of all rights in the major motion pictures Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi and Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace. Those motion pictures and the names and other elements which appear therein are protected by the copyright and trademark laws of the United States and other nations.

    It has come to our attention that you have used and are using one or more of our trademarks from Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi and Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace as the domain name on the World Wide Web, namely www.bobafett.com (the "Domain Name"). Lucasfilm Ltd. did not authorize your use of these materials in this or any other manner.

    Please be advised that the unauthorized use of our trademarks creates a likelihood of confusion as to the source, affiliation, or sponsorship of you or your company and constitutes actionable infringement under both state and federal laws. Your use of Lucasfilm's famous trademarks also dilutes the distinctive quality of those marks. Finally, it is well established that only the owner of a trademark may use that mark as a domain name. Your use of our marks not only misappropriates a valuable asset of Lucasfilm it threatens to cause us serious economic harm.

    We demand that you immediately cease and desist from any unauthorized use of the Domain Name and provide us written assurance that you will comply with this demand. Further, we demand that you immediately abandon use of the domain name listed above the transfer the domain name to Lucasfilm Ltd.

    The foregoing shall not be deemed a waiver of any claim at law or in equity which Lucasfilm Ltd. may have against you or any other party, each of which is expressly reserved.

    Failure to respond in writing to this letter by the close of business on Friday, June 23, 2000 may result in the initiation of legal proceedings without further notice to you. We look forward to your immediate response and cooperation.

    Sincerely,

    (signed)

    Tonik Barber
    Director of Business Affairs

    LUCASFILM
    P.O. Box 2009, San Rafael, California 94912-2009
    Telephone (415) 662-1800

Star Wars News 

Official News

Here's some of the locations we WILL be seeing in Episode II:
Coruscant, Naboo, Tatooine

Actors and actresses that are DEFINITELY in:
Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Hayden Christensen, Ian McDiarmid, Ahmed Best, Samuel L. Jackson, Christopher Lee, David Bowers, Rose Byrne, Matt Doran, Joel Edgerton, Jay Laga'aia, Daniel Logan, Alethea McGrath, Bonnie Piesse, Susie Porter, Matt Rowan, Veronica Segura, Leeanna Walsman and Jimmy Smits

And here's characters that WILL be in Episode II:
Anakin Skywalker, Beru, Boba Fett, C-3PO, Jar Jar Binks, Mace Windu, Obi-Wan , Kenobi, Owen Lars, Padmé, Palpatine, R2-D2, Yoda and Bail Organa

Casting Couch 

Who would you like to see play Boba Fett in Episode II?

This is a kind of weird nomination, but you know those rumors about Boba Fett being a chick? If he turns out to be a she I think a good actress to play the bounty hunter would be Michelle Yeoh (Supercop, Supercop 2, Tommorow Never Dies). If he remains a guy I think Jet Li (Fist of Legend, Lethal Weapon 4, Black Mask, Romeo Must Die) would be another cool choice.

Jet Vega

ASCII Art 

    _
   |T|  ___
  /|Y|\,P==
  ':@:
   |^\
   ] [
Boba Fett
©2000 RebelPilot

Casting Couch 

Who would you like to see play Boba Fett in Episode II?

MMMEEEEEEE!!!!!

Movies: None

Plays: Annie Jr. and Tom Sawyer (I was Doc, a bank robber!!)

raxxar99

Did You Know 

Boba Fett had four lines in The Empire Strikes Back.

BOBA FETT: As you wish.
BOBA FETT: He's no good to me dead.
BOBA FETT: What if he doesn't survive? He's worth a lot to me.
BOBA FETT: Put Captain Solo in the cargo hold.

In Return Of The Jedi Boba Fett has NO lines.

With the exception of the big girly scream into the Sarlacc.

Fett On The Web 

Build Your Own Boba Fett Outfit

A cool little site that's informative and smartly laid out.

Step by step instructions. Pictures. Tips. Advice. You can't go past this site for being both interesting and informative... and educational and entertaining.

Earlier this year I done a short review on it for Australia's Internet Directory.

Check it out at: http://www.geocities.com/~byobf (site no longer available)

Casting Couch 

Who would you like to see play Boba Fett in Episode II?

Okay, I've got myself a few suggestions for the Fettster.

Actor: Mel Gibson.
Movies he's been in: Every one knows Mel so it's an exercise in futility mentioning his large body of work.
Why: Mel's cool. 'nuff said.

Actor: Hugh Jackman.
Movies he's been in: A few that no one outside of Australia has heard of as well as a television mini-series and in a musical or two. And there's his part as Wolverine in the new X-Men movie.
Why: It really doesn't take that much acting skill to play the man in the Mandalorian Armour, but it's the cult status and fan adoration that comes AFTER the part. Jackman will be a pro at that by the time the X-Men hysteria has calmed down.

Actor: Heath Ledger
Movies he's been in: Two Hands, 10 Things I Hate About You, Patriot (with Mel Gibson).
Why: He's young and nearer to Anakin's age. And like Mel and Hugh, he's cool.

Actor: Russell Crowe
Movies he's been in: Romper Stomper, The Insider, Gladiator, Virtuosity, The Quick And The Dead and heaps of others.
Why: Before Edward Norton played a neo-Nazi who developed some common sense in American History X, Russ played a neo-Nazi who never came to his senses in Romper Stomper. Even back then he was a brilliant actor. But that's not the reason why he should play Boba Fett. The only reason I can think of is: he's cool.

 

Humour 

Top 10 Unseen Gadgets In Boba Fett's Arsenal

10. Secret decoder ring

9. Business card carrying-case

8. Water pistol for "prank" kills

7. Laser wristband also houses can opener, saw, toothpick, and corkscrew

6. Video arcade to lighten the mood in "Slave I"

5. Jetpack has concealed espresso machine

4. Beeper

3. *Insert your own codpiece joke here*

2. Those are L. L. Bean shoes he's wearing

1. Missile-firing jetpack. MISSILE-FIRING JET PACK!

©2000 Nigel Willis

That's All Folks! 

Hope you enjoyed the foray into fettdom.

Later this week I'll be posting some special new Fett clip-art to starwars-clipart (you can sign up by sending a blank email to starwars-clipart-subscribe@yahoogroups.com).

One of the clip-arts will be the FETT CREST (an ascii rendition is demonstrated at the end of this issue). Now you can publicly display your devotion to the galaxies roughest scoundrel by inserting this unique clip-art in any and all of your word processor documents.

Send me word on where YOU will be using it.

gLeN
www.rebelpilot.net ~~~~:>o<:

RebelPilot:>o<: = = = = = = = = = = = (-o-)
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Disclaimer 

This ezine is in no way sponsored or endorsed by: George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, LucasArts Entertainment Co, LucasBooks, Skywalker Sound, THX, Industrial Light & Magic or anything else that George has his fingers in. Star Wars and all its characters are © ,®, ™ and whatever other little symbols George wishes to slap on his creative works.

All witty remarks, retorts and repartee is ©2000 RebelPilot unless otherwise specified. Any use of the contents from this ezine without permission is strictly prohibited... and frankly, not a very nice thing to do. If you want to use it, just ask.
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About RebelPilot

In addition to Star Wars I enjoy writing, humour, comedy. Especially humorous writing in comedy. Star Wars is a passion, though not an obsession. While I have read every novel available (except for the last few) I have never been known to turn up to a movie premiere in costume. Though if I were to have an authentic looking stormtrooper outfit it may have been a different story.

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