Krampus

Most holiday story books offer sugary sweet visions of cozy, soft and round characters like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. The stories are earnestly moral and emotionally safe, with the characters getting exactly what they deserve and all little boys and girls ending up safe and sound tucked into bed.

That's not what you'll find in Krampus Tales, a new book of short fiction by Peregrin Wood, long time writer for Irregular Times. Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny are in these stories, sure, but they aren't the protagonists. A horned wild man with a shaggy beard, cloven hooves and an absurdly long tongue is the main character, an antihero who defies expectations at every turn.

Yes, it's Krampus. In a children's book.

This children's book includes deceit, disrespect, thievery, kidnapping and extramarital affairs.

Want to get your kids away from the sickening sap of mainstream Christmas pap? Give them Krampus Tales. I guarantee that you'll find it a stimulating experience.

The 2012 presidential campaign season could not be fairly said to be in full swing without some kind of surprise candidate, coming from the outside. In this year's case, that outsider candidate is from way, way, way outside - like the frozen hinterlands of the Alps over in Europe. It's Krampus for President in 2012!

This candidate definitely meets the age requirement, as he's thousands of years old, but what of nationality? "I'm a citizen of the world," explains Krampus, "and that includes the United States. I'm running. Let them try to stop me!"

Krampus has no campaign manager, but most political analysts regard him as essentially unmanageable. One thing Krampus can claim that no other candidate can is that he's taken no money from any corporate executives or lobbyists at all. "What kind of CEO would give money to a guy with horns?" Krampus asks. He's counting on his natural charm, rather than television commercials, to

This first item is as classic for winter time as anything that Coca-Cola can come up with using that overstuffed Kris Kringle. It features Krampus moving through a snow-buried winter scene in nothing but his cloven hooves and his barrel strapped to his back. It's a greeting holiday postcard from Krampus, right in front of the evergreen trees that symbolize the eternal nature of Krampus.

Also check out these two Krampus buttons, available elsewhere as Krampus Christmas Tree Ornaments:



Krampus Rules Yule button.