Looking for LOVE

Sometimes it can seem frustrating when you are in a relationship. There are things that you need from the other person and you're getting everything but what you want. There are times when you feel like you are hitting a wall, but then if you two can come to realize what it is that you two would like from each other then you'll be able to have a better and stronger relationship.

The first thing that you have to realize is that she really does not want the gifts. Although, gifts are nice, they are nicer when it is a complete surprise and from your heart. What she wants from you to love her when she looks perfect, and love her when she looks awful with the flu. She wants you to want to do things for her. Most women feel like the thoughtfulness is what counts. That is why she never makes fun of you when you burn dinner black, and she laughs when you make the vacuum explode. Even though you can screw things up so badly, she loves you because you wanted to give her the thoughtfulness of the gift.

Have you ever watched the movie "The Breakup" with Jennifer Anniston? All she wanted him to do was want to do the dishes. That is all she wants from you. She wants you to want to do the dishes and she wants you to do things without having to be told or asked. She wants you to want to marry her, even when it seems all about the ring. That is not the case. To love a woman the way she wants to be loved is a lot of work. You have to think like her.

If she is not a hopeless romantic, then do not try to be, all you can do is be sincere. Tell her that you love her before she falls asleep and as soon as she wakes up. Then spend the whole day proving it through your actions. Make breakfast with her, make the bed with her, and be apart of her live other then being the one that she lives with. If you share some of the daily chores around the house, she will really know that you love her.

Another thing is that you need to stop comparing her to your mother. Love her for her and do not say things that are going to hurt her indirectly or directly. Do not even dare say, "My mother does it this way," because she is not your mother, she is your lover and companion. This means that you need to love her enough to do things independently and try to make things right for you two.

The way a woman wants to be loved is unconditional. Even when she burns dinner or when she looks awful you have to still talk to her and touch her like you love her anyway. Take her hand in your hands and give her a simple kiss on the forehead every time she looks like she is about to cry. When things get too much for her, ask to take over. Any every time that you look at her, look at her like it was the first. Do things that tells her that you love her, even a simple hand on her back could mean so much to her.

You should also do things to keep the magic going. Draw her a bubble bath and let her come home to dinner and candles. Do things just for her because you want to. That is all she wants from you is to "want to." She wants you to do so much for her, but she is happy when you do even the smallest gestures. That's another thing, there is no insignificant way of saying I love you, because every thing can say those three words. In fact, those three harmless, little words mean 'way too' much, but they are harder ever said enough. You can never tell her that you love too much, and you can never harm the relationship by loving her the way a woman needs to be loved. She just needs to held and kissed and kept warm through the cold nights.

If you really want to love her the way she wants to be loved, you may want to think more about her. If you do something for her, just for her, everyday, you are bound will grow stronger. Something as small as a lunchtime phone call will say so much in such little time and with such little effort. If you just tell her and show her how much you feel about her, then you will definitely love her the way that she would like you to.

Do you wish the woman you love to fall hopelessly in love with you? Know what your woman SECRETLY wants, needs and desires in her life, love, romance and relationships. YOU can GROW HER LOVE for YOU and only YOU by knowing how to push her emotional and physical "HOT" buttons!

Many people have different opinions regarding this. Frankly speaking, it can't be defined; because if it can be defined, it won't be the genuine love that all of us are trying to seek afterall.

This is what I think - what is happening when we fall in love?

To understand that which is called "Love", you have to understand that all human beings are born with basic needs such as love, power, fun, freedom and survival. Whatever we do all our lives, we are always attempting to live in a way that will best satisfy one or more of these needs.

And this is all natural. This is what make us humans.

When we meet the love of our life; we fall in love; we hit it off right away. Because there is something about him or her which makes us FEEL GOOD! And feeling good about
ourselves is a basic need. Different people will have different relationship experiences.

But one thing that is common to us all is that whenever we are with our love interest, we find one or more of our needs being satisfied. One person will FEEL GOOD about being with that special someone. Another person may find himself or herself useful in some ways, and he or she gets a feeling of SELF WORTH. And yet, another person find himself or herself being in POWER in the relationship; and if he or she craves for power; the need to stay in the relationship arises.

This could be the truth of reality in our relationships with other people.

Your partner is constantly thinking, whether consciously or subconsciously, "What's in it for me to keep this relationship or marriage with you?"

If what your partner is being asked to do satisfy one or more of his basic needs, a great deal of things gets done.

If your partner cares for you and he or she feels good in the process, he may even do what is distasteful to himself because pleasing you strongly satisfies his basic need for love and friendship. This means that as much as we dislike it, we may run errands for our mate because we care for them, but if we stop caring for our love interests, we may stop running errands for them.

Much misery from relationships and marriages is caused by our failure to understand that we cannot get other people, even if we love them and they love us, to do what we want
them to do if it is extremely unsatisfying to them.

Many of us struggle painfully to try to make a loved one we love change his or her ways because we know that what we want them to do is better for him or her than what they are
doing. Time may prove us right.

However, what many of us do is to engage in what is often a losing battle, because we have forgotten that our loved ones have their own needs to satisfy too!

When our partner stay out late at night, how would you feel? Some of you may worry and suffer beyond belief. But the more you act the boss and try to force him or her into
coming home at a reasonable hour, the less control they seem to have and the more miserable they are.

Although we can control our own behaviour, it is obvious that much of what we choose to do is an attempt to control others.

To keep a relationship or marriage long lasting, you have to constantly ask yourself if you are WILLING and ABLE to take from your partner what he or she is able to give during this
point in time of their life.

This is why true love only exists when we can take care of our own needs, and able to love ourselves as much as we love our partners.

Imagine if you are nagging, complaining, comparing,questioning, pestering the love of your life all day long regarding your relationship, your circumstances and conditions. You are depressed, unhappy, confused, and lost. And there's a dark gloom over your head.

Let me tell you something, your partner is not able, or perhaps, will not do anything about it! Tell me, which parts of the state you are in now will satisfy his or her basic needs? What is it ABOUT YOU that will help him or her to see you in a new light, and to want to be with you once again?

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Finding love in this day and age is becoming harder and harder. Ask any single, and they will tell you that the stresses and demands of work mean they have little spare time to spend on the social circuit. It's hard enough finding time for ourselves these days, let alone fitting in time to meet new people. In fact, a lot of couples don't realize just how hard it is to meet new friends.

These days we live such hectic and individualized lives that the possibility of connecting with that 'someone special' is becoming more and more remote. And let's face it, the usual haunts like pubs and clubs are generally the last place you can really talk and get to know someone. Are you really likely to meet that magical woman of your dreams during happy hour at the local watering hole? Or is it realistic that you will run into that unique, caring man you hope to meet on the dance floor of a sweaty, noisy nightclub?

The truth is that many of the usual encounters these days between men and women may well lead to sex, but they rarely lead to meaningful, long term relationship where the couple have similar interests, core values and dreams.It is frustrating, demoralizing and can cause people to throw their hands up in despair.

In actual fact, you don't have to give up on love, because there are plenty of novel and less known ways of meeting people that you may not have thought about before. Here's are few ideas for finding that special person you'll want to share your life with.

How do I meet someone special?

Meeting a woman or man that is attractive to you and on your wave-length is probably the hardest part of finding new love. The old adage "there are plenty of fish in the sea" might be true, but the trick is finding new ways to go fishing successfully! Innovative ways of meeting potential new love mates are the key.

When it comes to meeting someone who is similar to you, try writing a list of the past-time and hobbies that interest you and then go from there. For example, if you are an art lover, your best bet of meeting a person who shares your passion for art is by joining a club at the local art gallery or by attending new exhibitions and openings. You will be surprised at how many people you will meet, and the faces that will soon become familiar over time.

By just talking about your favorite topic you will soon make plenty of connections with fascinating members of the opposite sex. The same applies if you are a sports buff or outdoors lover. Just by joining clubs, associations or engaging in activities where there will be people with similar interests as yourself, you will naturally increase your chances of meeting someone who shares the same passions and drives as you. This principle is clearly a winner, as hundreds of dating services have based the concept of matching singles together on this concept alone.

Asking that special someone out on a date

Once you have found someone who you like and are attracted to, don't be shy about making the first move. Whether you are a man or a woman, asking your new friend out on a date is imperative because you need to show your interest for the other party to reciprocate. The dating experts at TheSite.org suggest It's hard asking someone out on a date because we all fear rejection. That said, people are naturally captivated by those among us that are confident and self-assured.

So before you ask that special person out on a date try reciting some internal mantras to yourself. They will help bolster your confidence and raise your self-esteem. Say to yourself over and over: "I am an attractive, special and unique person. I am fascinating and fun to be with. I am worthy of love." By believing in your own loveability, others will too.

Making that first date a success

Once you have gotten the "thumbs up" from your new friend, the next step is going on the first date. Studies show that the first date is a really critical time - it's when you and date get to know one another and determine whether you want to take your friendship to the next level. Making an impression on a first date is easy when you remember these tips. :

Firstly, make sure you make regular eye contact with your date. Eye contact is an important part of flirting. In fact, research has shown that eye contact reveals a lot about honesty, openness and levels of interest. If you don't make enough eye contact your date may see you as shifty, untrustworthy or lacking in interest. On the contrary too much eye contact can be interpreted as overly intense, pushy or downright creepy.

Other tips to remember are to plan your evening well. Ask your date what food he or she likes so that you can take them to a restaurant they will enjoy. Making sure you are dressed appropriately is also imperative. Over or under-dressing can be embarrassing for both people. For example if you are going to a baseball game, don't drag out your string of pearls and high heels. On the other hand if you are going to the opera, jeans and trainers are clearly a no-no. Thinking about the details of your evening lets you anticipate all eventualities so you will be prepared, comfortable and relaxed.

It is true that finding new love in this modern age is a challenge. But you can increase your chances of finding making new friends or perhaps finding your soul-mate by thinking more seriously about where you might meet like-minded people in the first place, as well as carefully planning your first date.

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If you are still single and yearning for that someone special to come into your life, to share your life, and to share all the laughter and joy of being together, there is something you could do to attract your true love like a
magnet!

(1)You must believe you are able to attract true love.

This is important! In order to attract your true love, not just any type of lovers, to come into your life, you have to believe you are able to attract the right person into your life. True love comes to you not because of chance. Instead, it comes to you because of who you are. It comes 'through' you, it does not come to you. You attract the people in your life because of who you are. If you are someone who is always cheery, generous, kind, and hardworking, then it is very likely you will attract people who have one or more of your positive attributes. Whoever you attract into your lives is a reflection of who you are at that moment. Thus if you are someone who is always doubtful of your own ability and capability to meet the right person, then it is very likely you will attract the wrong person into your life!

(2)Love others who come into your life at this moment.

Being loving to others is perfect love, not just wanting love. Open up your heart and give your love to others as well while you are waiting for your someone special to enter your life. When you open up and give more love, more love will return and be given you too. This is the law of give and receive. When you go outside and socialize, do not go with the intention of only wanting to find love, or to find your Mr/Mrs Right. Instead, take an interest in all those that you encounter, be aware of their welfare and needs as well. If you start to take an interest in other people's welfare and needs instead of only your own, more people will be attracted to you. So, detach yourself from the feeling that you want to find that someone special. The right person will definitely come to you one day and be attracted to you because of who you are. He or she might must be around in a corner thinking : "Hey, I want to get to know this person who has so much magnetism and optimism. How can I approach him/her?"

(3)Expect less from other people and give more instead.

As you give more and more love to others, be careful not to become too much focused on your own wants and needs. In wanting or expecting to experience the love we want, we suffer. We crave, and we cling to what we do not have and we even refuse to let go what we have clung to. Your giving should not come with any conditions. Instead, the love you give should want less and less. As your love wants less and less, ironically you will find more love coming your way, even without you asking for it.

Give true love, so that it opens up and embrace the world. Very soon, you will find that someone special entering your life. It is not by chance that this person has entered your life, but you have cultivated the 'seeds' to bring him/her to you, not just any type of person, but the right and true one for you. And after he/she has entered your life, continue to cultivate even more 'seeds' of love for everyone around you, and you will find that you can easily create the 'magical' relationship that you desire effortlessly.

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