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Sometimes when I'm alone...I pretend....

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Make pretend jokes

So there's a new phenomenon going on called "make pretend" jokes. If you've never heard of it, it's quite simple. I'll start with an example: "Sometimes when I'm alone I dress up in all white, spill a drink, and clean it up pretending I'm a paper towel."

The basic format is "Sometimes when I'm alone..........I pretend......" These are very funny and the point of this lens is to see who can come up with the funniest ones. Let's just hope we are all "making pretend" and not being for real. Enjoy!

Enter yours here!

  • SNAKE! Jun 1, 2012 @ 5:33 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone, I like to hangglide on doritos!!
  • nicolette May 31, 2012 @ 11:57 am | delete
    sometimes when i am alone i clean.
  • nicolette May 31, 2012 @ 11:57 am | delete
    sometimes when i am alone i clean.
  • roflcopterz May 31, 2012 @ 9:40 am | delete
    sometimes when I'm alone I put I white cloth on my penis and pretend it's a ghost :)
  • Tsukimi May 30, 2012 @ 9:26 pm | delete
    When I'm bored I fill the bathtub with marinara sauce,climb in it and pretend I'm a meatball
  • Jane May 30, 2012 @ 6:22 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to cover myself in red paint and pretend I'm a tampon
  • Bobette May 29, 2012 @ 8:58 am | delete
    sometimes, when i'm alone i...
    put my Doritos in water to keep them dry!
  • Anonymous May 28, 2012 @ 1:22 pm | delete
    Sometimes, when I'm alone, I roll around in dirt and pretend I'm a carrot.
  • LolMonsterr May 28, 2012 @ 2:55 am | delete
    Sometimes, when im bored and lonely, i like to put fake fangs on lay under my matress and pretend im part of the monsters inc scream squad (if you havent watched the movie monsters inc, you wouldnt understand)
  • Tabitha Niggggah May 25, 2012 @ 7:39 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im bored I cover myself in baby oil, get naked, squeez into a tight spot and pretend im being re born,
  • Tabitha Niggggah May 25, 2012 @ 7:39 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im bored I squeez the blood out of stakes into a cup and pour it over my head then go to the park and ask moms if I can play with their babies.
  • Some Guy May 24, 2012 @ 6:35 pm | delete
    Sometimes i like to dressup as a potato but act like a carrot when im sleeping
  • gill May 23, 2012 @ 5:27 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone i strap a bomb to my chest and pretend im joey battaglia
  • Rebecca CHICKENFLUFFINNUGGET May 22, 2012 @ 11:13 pm | delete
    Sometimes, When I am all alone, I throw myself into a succulent marinade and stab chopsticks into my body pretending I am a tender meaty chicken shiska bob:) I then slowly float over to the barbecue and turn myself ever so slowly, grilling my meat to perfection<3
  • Rebecca CHICKENFLUFFINNUGGET May 22, 2012 @ 11:13 pm | delete
    Sometimes, When I am all alone, I throw myself into a succulent marinade and stab chopsticks into my body pretending I am a tender meaty chicken shiska bob:) I then slowly float over to the barbecue and turn myself ever so slowly, grilling my meat to perfection<3
  • imadinosaurrr May 22, 2012 @ 8:34 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to lay on the ground and pretend I'm a fucking flower motherfuckers.
  • Jazzy May 22, 2012 @ 2:30 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I pour syrup on me and pretend I'm a waffle :D
  • Master baiter May 22, 2012 @ 4:21 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I fold my hand and I pretend its a vagina.
  • Master baiter May 22, 2012 @ 4:19 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I fold my hand and I pretend its a vagina.
  • Master baiter May 22, 2012 @ 4:18 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I fold my hand and pretend its a vagina.
  • Marz May 20, 2012 @ 9:01 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm home alone I like to lie on the floor and pretend I'm a crumb from a morning poptart
  • QERTYUIOP May 20, 2012 @ 2:12 pm | delete
    sometimes when im bored i like to sit in my refrigerator and pretend im a slice of cheese.
  • Jack May 18, 2012 @ 2:54 pm | delete
    Somtimes I like to cover myself with my own seamen and crawl around on my kitchen floor pretending I'm a slug.
  • niggertittys May 17, 2012 @ 12:26 am | delete
    sometimes when i'm alone i like to stick a banana up my ass an pretend its micheal jackson
  • HieuyHefner May 16, 2012 @ 6:36 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im alone... i put on my rabbits ear and shove colorful eggs between my cheeks, hoping around the house and lay it like a easter bunny
  • Ben Schwartz May 14, 2012 @ 8:25 pm | delete
    Late at night, when everyone is sound asleep, I fill my bathtub with marinara. Then I submerge myself completely in the sause, and imagine that I'm a meatball.
  • t-rex May 12, 2012 @ 10:15 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone I lok and the mirrow and say roar... to mkae believe im a dinosaur
  • Tyler Genden May 12, 2012 @ 10:14 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone I put on a fake beard and make believe im matt gill
  • matt gill May 12, 2012 @ 10:12 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone i look at a picture of deciccos kissy face and cry... Why can GOD create someone so ugly
  • Pfft May 12, 2012 @ 4:42 pm | delete
    Sometimes, when I'm all alone, I crawl under the covers, stick my head out, and pretend I'm a joint.
  • CharitiMangina May 12, 2012 @ 2:17 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I fantisize about Hunter Will... Nbd;)
  • Hayley May 11, 2012 @ 11:17 pm | delete
    Sometimes When Im Bored I Lay On My Kitchen Floor And Pretend Ima Crumb
  • Shawn May 11, 2012 @ 3:22 am | delete
    Sometimes I come on here and act really disappointed.... Oh Wait!
  • RegulateIsfat May 10, 2012 @ 6:34 am | delete
    I like turtles like I like my meat, up my asshole and in Regulates fat dickhole.
  • xXxKuntDestroyR May 10, 2012 @ 6:33 am | delete
    Sometimes I spread my ass cheeks, approach little boys and tell them it's a cookie maker.
  • SRMTHFG May 8, 2012 @ 9:48 pm | delete
    Some times I like to shove JELLYBEANS in my ass hole and pretend I'm the Easter bunny
  • MelloJello May 7, 2012 @ 9:57 pm | delete
    Sometimes I like to cover myself in vasoline and pretend i'm a slug
  • Taylorisradmontgomery May 7, 2012 @ 9:22 pm | delete
    Sometimes I like to lay on the floor and pretend I'm a carrot
  • JohnThePenisEater May 2, 2012 @ 12:21 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to Shove floppy disks in my butt and pretend I'm windows 98.
  • JohnThePenisEater May 2, 2012 @ 12:21 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to Shove floppy disks in my butt and pretend I'm windows 98.
  • JohnThePenisEater May 1, 2012 @ 12:13 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to cover my self with plastic wrap, hang upside down in a tree, and pretend I'm a Butterfly in a cacoon.
  • pono fitzpatrick. add me on face book guys!!!!! May 1, 2012 @ 3:53 am | delete
    sometimes when im all alone i like to shit in my hand and throw it at my cat pretending to be a monkey.
  • elijah kanuha. add me on facebook guys!!! i want more friends! May 1, 2012 @ 3:50 am | delete
    sometimes when im alone i like to lick my nutsack
  • poidog808 May 1, 2012 @ 3:40 am | delete
    sometimes when im not alone i like to kill the people so i am alone....
  • poidog808 May 1, 2012 @ 3:38 am | delete
    no ones gonna read this but i have a small mangina.
  • daisy violet May 13, 2012 @ 7:23 am | delete
    i read it.
  • d dawg May 13, 2012 @ 7:51 am | delete
    hey daisy !
  • Maeve Paterson May 27, 2012 @ 7:03 pm | delete
    I read this D:
  • manaman808 Apr 30, 2012 @ 11:12 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone i duct tape a knife to my head and pretend im a unicorn and then i have sex with my pillow pet unicorn.
  • -_- Apr 30, 2012 @ 11:43 pm | delete
    your fucked up
  • manaman808 May 1, 2012 @ 3:38 am | delete
    no im not. you can go die.
  • just_me_here May 3, 2012 @ 7:00 am | delete
    yeah you are.
  • manaman808 May 13, 2012 @ 10:53 pm | delete
    shut up dumb bitch
  • poidog808 Apr 30, 2012 @ 11:10 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone i like to jag off
  • podepooooo808 Apr 30, 2012 @ 11:06 pm | delete
    sometimes when im alone i like to curl up into a ball and pretend im a sphere....
  • Brad Apr 30, 2012 @ 5:22 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im home alone i sllep with my socks on .... Just my socks on
  • Brad Apr 30, 2012 @ 5:21 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im home alone i like to cover my self in nuttella and pretend im a turd
  • JohnThePenisEater Apr 30, 2012 @ 12:13 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone, I like to put peanutbutter on my privates and have my dog(s) lick it off.
  • Mrs. Horan Apr 29, 2012 @ 6:31 pm | delete
    all the time when i'm alone i fantasize about one direction <3
  • KayKayz321D Apr 30, 2012 @ 10:06 pm | delete
    LOL, or in math class...
  • crazedfangurrrrrl May 31, 2012 @ 7:43 pm | delete
    all the time no matter what i fa,ntasize about One Direction <3
  • podepooooo808 Apr 28, 2012 @ 1:29 am | delete
    Sometimes when im alone, i paint myself green and sit in a tree with my tongue out pretending im a chameleon.
  • pleasegethelp Apr 28, 2012 @ 8:11 pm | delete
    i know poeple who can help you.....
  • Maeve Paterson May 27, 2012 @ 7:05 pm | delete
    LOOL!
  • poidog808 Apr 27, 2012 @ 4:35 am | delete
    Sometimes when im alone, i shit in my hand and rub it on my neighbors windows.
  • penis May 11, 2012 @ 11:51 pm | delete
    i do that all the time..
  • Kaitlyn Apr 26, 2012 @ 7:48 pm | delete
    Pretend i can poop out meatballs!
  • If this made you laugh, subscribe to midgetking101 Apr 25, 2012 @ 12:11 pm | delete
    Some times when im alone i climb a tree, hang upside down, duct tape my hands to my arm pits and act like a bat.
  • poidog808 Apr 28, 2012 @ 1:30 am | delete
    you are a faggot.
  • Jac May 3, 2012 @ 10:35 pm | delete
    You can go suck ur dads dick
  • Jac Apr 25, 2012 @ 12:02 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm home alone I put water in my belly button and pretend it's a pool for my fingers
  • For Serious Apr 24, 2012 @ 10:45 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I shove a bunch of banana slugs up my butthole and pretend I'm a giant slug mother giving birth to a colony of slugs.
  • I suck at this. Apr 24, 2012 @ 10:44 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to lie on my table and pretend I'm a place mat.
  • backpage Apr 21, 2012 @ 10:25 pm | delete
    sometimes when i'm alone i pretend i have tits and act like ryan henshaw
  • BackPage Apr 21, 2012 @ 10:25 pm | delete
    sometimes when i'm alone i pretend to have tits and act like ryan henshaw
  • LQQKin4u Apr 21, 2012 @ 11:52 am | delete
    sometimes when I'm alone i pretend my dogs are little baby birds and i feed them them mouth to mouth.
  • djblur Apr 21, 2012 @ 7:09 am | delete
    nobody's going to even read this so i think it's safe to say.... I have a small penis
  • lll Apr 28, 2012 @ 1:07 am | delete
    so read that
  • BabyGirl May 27, 2012 @ 7:08 pm | delete
    This is an interesting one. I think I may use this one.
  • Dick Apr 17, 2012 @ 11:32 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I super glue my thumbs to my nipples and pretend I'm a t-Rex!
  • djblur Apr 17, 2012 @ 4:25 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm bored.....I like to remove the shelves from my refrigerator and sit in there for a while and pretend I'm a gallon of milk
  • Gare bear Apr 17, 2012 @ 3:19 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone and I take a crap, I pretend I'm a male seahorse giving birth.
  • Shit-head key jelly Apr 13, 2012 @ 10:15 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm home alone I hang from the dusty running-ceiling fan with my dick screaming "Kumbaya, my lord!"
  • RussianNinja99 from youtube Apr 13, 2012 @ 9:42 pm | delete
    sometimes, when every one has gone to sleep i like to get a bath of tomato puree and pretend i'm a meatbal
  • djblur Apr 13, 2012 @ 11:24 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm home alone, I like to throw on Whitney Houston's Best Of album and have a good cry.
  • smai Apr 13, 2012 @ 9:08 am | delete
    sometimes when im alone i like to cover myself in shit and roll around the garden pretending i'm a fertilizer spreader
  • Yololoy Apr 11, 2012 @ 10:51 pm | delete
    Sometimes when im alone i put a garbage can over my head and pretend im a lamp.
  • alexa Apr 9, 2012 @ 11:59 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I fill my bathtub with marinara sauce submerge myself in it and pretend im a meatball
  • Lmfao Apr 8, 2012 @ 6:10 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I sit in my closet with the light off and pretend i'm a potato
  • Marz Apr 7, 2012 @ 10:53 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm alone I like to lay on my bed and pretend I'm a blanket
  • Shawn Apr 7, 2012 @ 9:03 pm | delete
    Sometimes I like to lay on my bathroom floor and pretend I'm a pube.
  • Shanana Berry Apr 7, 2012 @ 3:54 pm | delete
    Sometimes, when I'm alone, I fill a bathtub full of skittles, jump in, and pretend I'm godzilla in a ballpit.
  • boo May 22, 2012 @ 8:11 pm | delete
    Best one yet!
  • Maeve Paterson May 27, 2012 @ 7:10 pm | delete
    How much do you think this woud cost?
  • Shanerz Apr 7, 2012 @ 10:10 am | delete
    Sometimes when I'm home alone I like to cover myself in Vaseline, get in the bathtub and pretend I'm a slug.
  • Marzzz Apr 7, 2012 @ 10:47 pm | delete
    Oh shana lmao
  • crap....i peed my pants Apr 6, 2012 @ 10:50 pm | delete
    Sometimes when I'm with my friends I wish I could write I miss you a rock and throw it at my boyfriend's face so he knows how much it hurts to miss him.
  • Menchi Apr 6, 2012 @ 6:51 am | delete
    Sometimes, when I'm alone, I like to beat off to gay porn and pretend I'm gay.
  • hjygckdtyifty7ik May 8, 2012 @ 12:27 pm | delete
    You dont have to pretend buddy
  • djblur Apr 6, 2012 @ 4:31 am | delete
    Does anybody else like to walk around town with a backpack when the streets are empty so you can feel like a survivor in a zombie apocalypse movie? ... No?
    I do. Especially when it's foggy and 4:30AM in the morning
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