Monitoring Software

A lot of parents seem cautious and apprehensive about monitoring their child's Internet activity. A lot of comparisons have been made to reading your child's diary, listening to phone conversations and opening their mail. Parents, for some reason, are under the impression that a teenager or young Internet user deserves total privacy, just because they exist. Parents also seem to continue with the false assumption that "it won't happen to me."

This couldn't be further from the truth and closer to dangerous and irresponsible parenting behavior.

First of all, let's look at the comparisons:
1. The diary of generation past was a private document that NO ONE but the author read, often kept both locked and hidden. MySpace pages are viewed by millions of people.
2. Phone conversations took place between 2 (sometimes 3) people, and both you and your child knew for absolute certain who was on the other end of the line. However, in a chatroom, anyone can pretend to be anyone.
3. Reading letters, school notes or mail is nothing like reading an email to an unidentified sender. If a parent saw a suspicious piece of mail, you can be darn well sure they would either open it first or make the child open it in front of them.

Don't make or believe such bogus and far fetched comparisons. The Internet and the communication it affords is a whole separate ballgame. It's called evolution: technology has evolved, so must the practices of parenting.

The second thing to consider is the false sense of security that parents love to adopt: the fatal words "that would never happen to me/my kid." You can't control that. Just because you are safe around your kids, doesn't mean those they interact with have the same safety in mind. A lot of self-proclaimed "experts" and cynics want you to believe that fears of Internet predators are overblown and a bunch of hype. While the number of victims may be low - we won't ignore that truth - there is an endless supply of scumbags trolling the net trying to get to children. If you don't believe me, check out Pandora's Blog (http://blog.pcpandora.com/); not a week goes by where somewhere in the country multiple arrests are made for attempted Internet luring. For all the online predators that get caught, plenty more survive to troll another day. In addition, ask yourself why these guys take the risks%u2026 it's because more succeed than fail, but we never find out. Not all children consider themselves to be victims. Many are consenting, especially when no deception on the Internet predator's part has taken place.

A third point, which is arguably more important, is cyberbullying. 1 in 7 kids may be solicited for sex online, but almost 50% will have some sort of bout with cyberbullying. They may be the victim of a harsh smear campaign that makes its way through the school student body within hours OR, even worse, they may be the instigator. These aren't your playground bullies of the '70s and '80s, these are smart kids bent on destroying the lives of their peers through the Internet. Be a parent, be aware and help put a stop to it.

Now, let's take a look at what monitoring software, like PC Pandora can provide. You can get detailed sequential snapshots of everything that happens on the screen. Think of it like a TiVo or DVR for your PC. In addition, you can get detailed reports of IM chats, emails, websites visited, peer-to-peer files exchanged (teens have been known to illegally download media files), programs utilized, keystrokes logged and more. Parents can receive email updates at work with the IRIS feature and can set up simple website filters and blocks - though PC Pandora focuses on KNOWING, not restricting.

[For more information, visit the website: http://www.pcpandora.com]

Now, with the information obtained from monitoring PC activity, parents are charged with acting appropriately. Monitoring software gives parents complete knowledge; Knowledge is power; With great power comes great responsibility. Thus, parents must know to walk the line and not abuse monitoring software for total, frivolous snooping. It's not of consequence who said what in school and who likes whom. But it is important to know if your child is engaged in cyberbullying (victim or aggressor) or if they are talking to someone in chatrooms named "bigjohnson32."

The fear of monitoring computer activity and the thought that teens and young adults deserve total privacy because they exist is the mindset that has brought us to the current culture. Teenagers have zero respect for their parents and other adult figures, because they have been given too much freedom. Freedom, of course, is not a bad thing, and we're not saying lock them up; we're saying parents need to have a more active role in controlling what their children are doing (that goes both on and offline). [Author's note: 25 years ago our kids weren't medicated as a behavioral solution and shows like Super Nanny and Nanny 911 did not exist.]

If parents were better informed, maybe teenagers wouldn't be committing suicide over a MySpace post, or being beaten by peers and humiliated nation-wide when a video of the beating becomes one of the most viewed pages online. Maybe they wouldn't be running off to meet a person they met online who has groomed them and earned their trust, whether or not deception was involved (and many studies show it rarely is).

Our challenge to parents is to take control. Don't be afraid. Show your children who the parents are. Don't be a push over. Set rules and enforce them. Explain to your kids why these rules are in place. Don't be afraid to recite the excuse your parents gave you: "Some day you'll understand." Do be afraid to ignore everything and let your child walk freely through that door that connects them to the World Wide Web, and connects that same world to them! Remember, they are young.

They will make the same dumb mistakes (by nature) that you made. That is part of growing up. But thanks to the Internet, the consequences have become more severe and effectively global. Protect and verify. Don't blindly trust and ignore. Use 21st century technologies like PC Pandora monitoring software to help you know what is going on. And while not everyone may need to implement a monitoring software program, monitoring Internet activity in some capacity is an essential part of parenting today.