My Mother

My Journey, A lifetime of verse... ISBN: 978-0-6151-6405-2

By, Trina L.C. Sonnenberg
Photography by, Jeff Sonnenberg

The perfect marriage of a lifetime of Trina's thoughts, feelings, and experiences, and the beauty of southwestern Colorado, as seen through Jeff's lens.


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Trina L.C. Sonnenberg, Internet marketer, author and publisher has just released a new book. This book is not in her typical genre of marketing and home business information, but it is a step in the opposite direction. 'My Journey' is a compilation of verse, written over the last 27 years, accompanied by breathtaking photos of southwestern Colorado.


A domestic abuse survivor, Trina used writing as a coping mechanism during her years of abuse. This book is the result of that personal struggle and has been published as a way of offering solidarity and hope to others who are in a similar situation.



'My Journey' is available at
trinaschiller.ws/book.html

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Nine years ago my mother came to live with me. Nine years ago I got along with my mother. Now, not so much. After moving into my home, my mother changed into a person I no longer know. She was very abusive to my youngest child, and I am having a hard time forgiving her for the damage done. Writing my book also left me with some issues with my mother. For example, at the age of 13 a member of my family tried to rape me, and my parents did nothing about it. Nothing!

So, now I have a huge dilemma. I don't know how to feel about my mother. Right now she is just a crabby bitch that lives with me, making everyone else unhappy.
She does not resemble the woman I rescued from my brother. (alcoholic) She has become so different. She is lazy and acts like she is ready for the grave. There is nothing wrong with her, medically, that would prevent her from taking care of herself, but she is constantly running to the doctor's office as though there is something terribly wrong.

She has Type II Diabetes, but she refuses to stick to a diet. She keeps putting on weight, yet complains about her knees hurting. She wants knee replacement because she won't have to pay for it. She won't prepare her body for the surgery, because she refuses to exercise. She has become a blob in front of the TV. All she does is eat and watch the idiot box. I can't bear to watch her slowly commit suicide. So, I have asked her to look for another place to live. I can't allow her to destroy my family, and that is the way it is coming down. My husband hates her; my son hates her, and I can no longer find reasons to defend her.

We got along great when we did not live together. Of course, my life was a mess then and it is not now. Perhaps that is the reason we got along then.

I have begun to wonder if my mother is envious of the fact that I have a great marriage and two great kids who love me very much. I went through hell to get here, and my mother just gave up. She could have dated, even got married again, but she just gave up. I didn't quit.

It is so sad that the only thing my mother really taught me is how NOT to be a parent. Both my parents taught me that.

My mother has become a first class complainer. Nothing is ever good enough for her.

I used to think that I loved my mother, but now I have to wonder about that. Right now I don't like her much.

She steals food from us. She takes food out of the pantry and hoards it in her room. No one else can eat it if it is in her room. For some reason she seems to think she is more deserving of the groceries I buy than my husband and son. So, I locked her out of the pantry. She won't have meals with us anymore, and I have no idea why. She holds up in her room all of the time. She has to have her own TV, and won't come sit with us for TV time.

She does nothing to help me around here. I have gotten more help from my 13 year-old than from her. She won't even sweep the floor. I'm sure in her mind she sees no reason to help out, since she stays in her room all of the time. She goes out only for lunch, three times a week, and to doctor's appointments. That's it. What a boring life.