My Mother's Stroke

,B.After reading "My Stroke of Insight," by Jane Bolte Taylor, Ph.D., and watching Oprah interview Jane on the Oprah Soul Series, I began to think of my mother's stroke on June 19, 1987.

She was having a stroke. During the CT scan of the brain, the professionals gave her too much anesthesia, and she went into a coma, never to return.

Although when the doctors at the teaching hospital kept asking her questions during the neurological exam, I noticed she refused to cooperate because when the people she loved showed up, she responded silently, wordlessly and lovingly.

Mom always called Ronald Reagon "that fertilizer head!!"

Once the doctors brought in a picture of Ronald Reagon and showed it to her.

"Who is this?" they asked.

"Shit head," she responded.

I surmised my dear mom did not want to be patronized, by anyone.

And that she wanted to die in peace.

Jane Bolte Taylor describes her stroke as feeling at one with the universe, as her body having no boundaries, and feeling as if she had reached the state of nirvana, heaven on earth, great peace and happiness.

When mom laughed and laughed, as her stroke was taking hold of her brain, I could tell she, too, was at peace and had obtained a childlike state to her consciousness.

I am happy to say that I was able to meet her there, to be with her, to allow her to be who she wanted to be,and who she was becoming.This served me well as I learned to meet my patients exactly where they are, without judgment.

As I read and listened to Jane Bolte Taylor tell of her spiritual experience during her stroke experience, I realized without doubt, that my mom was having a spiritual experience. She gave my dad and I a contact high.

She was ecstatic and so were we.

She connected us to our right brain, expansive and transcendent selves.

I remember coming back to my left brain with great effort when I realized it was my responsibility to get her help even though we were having the time of our lives.

Yet putting her in the hands of the doctors didn't save her life. But it did give all of us who loved her a chance to say our goodbyes.

For now.

Kate Loving Shenk