One Million (Quick and Easy) Steps to Becoming a Better Dad

It's THAT easy, really!

So, you wanna be a better dad, huh? Yeah, me too. Got any ideas? Ha ha, just kidding. You probably came here thinking that I was going to give you all the answers on fatherhood and becoming a better dad, didn't you? Huh, didn't you?

Well, the name of this lense pretty much sums it all up. It's easy to become a dad (you do remember how you did that don't you?) if not always that quick, and well, not always that easy either, but you know what I mean. Becoming a better dad (or even a good dad) takes time and effort.

Fatherhood is like chess (except the King and Queen both look tired and dishevelled and the other pieces keep running off the board, drooling and hitting each other): It takes a few minutes to learn how to be a good dad, but a lifetime to master.

My wife seems to have born with a natural instinct for raising kids. I, on the other hand have been born with a natural instinct for:

Surfing the Internet.
Making web pages.
Wasting time trying to fix broken web pages.
Wasting time.
Racing around the house, trying to remember where I left my car keys.

So this in this lense are some of the things that I have learned and some of the people I'm learning from. Enjoy, and by all means, feel free to HELP ME OUT!

Step #1 - Part 1. Get Involved.

The journey of a million steps begins...

...with just one step.

Seriously. It's so easy for me as a guy to get analysis paralysis, where I get so anxious about what to do that I end up doing nothing. The best solution for me is to get up and just DO something. Get involved. Ha, that's easier said than done, I know, but raising children - fatherhood - really is all about the 9,434,880 minutes that make up a child's life from the moment she's born until she's 18 yrs. old. It's not quality vs quantity, it's both.

As a guy, my tendency is also to look for big things I can do. If I'm not careful, I can get so caught up planning the Next Big Thing to do with my kids - the zoo, the day-trip, the amusement park - that I miss out on all of the Little Big Things in life; taking time to smell the flowers.

Step #1 - Part 2. Get Involved.

Here are some Little Big Things to help you on your way with the One Million Steps.

These are just some of the small things you can do to spend more time with your child. Most of them are not profound, no-brainers, but maybe something you didn't consider would help you bond with your child. Do them as often as possible, but don't sweat it if you can't. (See step #58.)

^#1

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Change a diaper

One great way to spend a little time with your child, is to change her diaper. It's something that's gotta be done anyway, and it helps break you out of that "women's work" mentality.0 points

^#2

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Give baby the bottle...

...or some other scheduled feeding, like a fruit snack or meal.0 points

^#3

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Read a book to your child

You can never start to early with reading to your child and I've found one of the highlights of my day to be reading to my 4-yr-old before bedtime. (You don't have to read just before bedtime, though.)0 points

^#4

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Ask him/her about their day

This is one you don't want to force too strongly, since some children just don't like talking about their day (I know, because I was one one of them) but it can be a great conversation starter if you don't know how to talk to your kid.0 points

Step #58. Relax.

No really, relax.

I mean, really, what's the worse thing that could happen? They could grow up to be sociopathic axe-murderers. But what are the chances of that? Pretty good for you, I'd say, ha ha.

Seriously, though, as a typical guy, I can easily get stressed out thinking about all the things I should be doing for my kids and what I should be doing to improve myself and worried about what I'm doing wrong. Our wives sometimes misunderstand us as we sit there staring blankly at the TV, drool forming in a puddle on the remote control as we zap through the channels. We look so relaxed (read stupid), but on the inside we are seething cauldrons of anxiety.

And could you please pass the potato chips.

(BTW, you should probably start saving now for your children's therapy later. Or for a DTS, it's cheaper.)

Step #13. Do some reading.

And vote.

^#1

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http://www.squidoo.com/onemilliondad/

Yours truly.1 point

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Ten Ways to Be a Better Father

Excellent article. If you only have a few minutes more...1 point

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Geekdad - Wired Blogs

Dads who are Geeks. And vice versa.0 points

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Digital Dad®

Dads who are digital and vice versa.0 points

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MetroDad

Poppycock from a cocky pop! (Language Advisory!)0 points

^#6

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DadBloggers

Some great advice from some Dads who blog0 points

^#7

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The Blogfathers - Dads You Can't Refuse

Dads You Can't Refuse0 points

Buying stuff. It always makes things better, right?

These products have nothing to do with this lense, except for the therapeutic value of buying electronics equipment. Come on Dad, you know you need it. (If you don't need it, you could always buy it for me.)