How To Overcome Divorce

Think back to your wedding day. You were filled with such love, joy and boundless hope at that time of your life. The future stretched out ahead of you like a rosy pink garden bursting with possibility. You saw days filled with laughter and nights filled with passion, never once dreaming of the turmoil and devastation that troubles you now. Divorce was merely something that happened to other people, except now it has in fact, happened to you.

Mourn. Allow yourself to feel your own feelings for your sanity's sake. Do not let anybody ever tell you to forget it and just move on. Your heart is broken , damn it! Let it all go. Sob into your pillow, grab your best friend and weep on her shoulder, but let it go. Keeping it inside is not healthy. Express your feelings. Not a crier? Write in a journal, then or paint a picture, but those feelings of loss and sadness have to come out to make room for the more positive emotions to blossom when you are ready.

After you are done with the moping, you might be ready to move on to anger. Anger is also perfectly normal and healthy emotion to have after a painful divorce. Feel like kicking and screaming? Join a kick boxing class and wail tar out of a paid professional. You get buff while you vent, it's a totally win-win situation! Why shouldn't you be mad? That man stood before God, friends and family and swore he would love you 'til death did you part. The last time you checked, neither of you were dead, so that means he lied to you and that is not fair! You're right, it's not fair and you have earned every right to be mad as hell.

Do you need counseling to overcome a painful divorce? That is a personal choice that only you can make. Some people cannot reach out to friends and family for support and would feel better taking their problems to a stranger. It is sad but true, some people cannot share their most intimate pain with blood relations, but can pick a stranger out of the phone book and spill their guts. And pay them to do it! If that is what you need to heal, then by all mean do so and do not let anyone talk you out of it. Talking will help, no matter who is doing the listening.

A divorce is an ending, but only of your marriage, not of your life. Maybe you can take this negative and turn it into something good. Your life is being overhauled already, maybe now is the time to take stock in other areas as well. Did you ever think about travel or a career change? Was there a restaurant that you always wanted to try but could not get your spouse interested in?

Give it a try now, there is no one to stop you. Sign up for classes at the local community college, or go whole hog and aim for a degree. Write a novel, join the circus, do something to occupy yourself because as painful as it seems at this moment, divorce is not the end of the whole world.