Rose and Tree Handfasting Ceremonies for Pagans

This exchange usually happens after the couple is pronounced as being wed. Besides the wedding rings this acts as the first gift they give each other.

The clergy person performing the ceremony would ask the couple to exchange the roses. A statement is then made regarding the preciousness of the gift of love that is being given. Though they may seem but simple flowers, the couple is reminded of the different stages a rose goes through from bud to flower representing their love evolving from new excitement into a mature love.

The roses can then be dried and placed in a special place of honor in the couple's home. Over time, the flowers will come to remind them of the commitment they made to get through the good times and the bad together.

This rite is an easily adaptable ceremony that can be tailored to each person's tastes. Two rosebuds could be given instead of roses in full bloom. The couple would then care for the rosebuds until they reach maturity. In this way, they ritually reinforce that they will tend to each other's needs.

A bouquet of several flowers or different colored roses could be exchanged instead of the two red roses. Each flower would represent a specific trait in the language of flowers that is important in the marriage, i.e. the white rose for chastity, the yellow rose for friendship.

Like the language of flowers, trees have come to symbolize certain traits. By their very nature, trees represent longevity and withstanding the test of time. The mighty oak says your love is firmly planted on the ground while the birch tree strips away all pretense.

Care should be taken to choose a tree or bush that is native to your area that will thrive in the environment you place it. If you do not have property of your own to plant it, check with a local park or other recreation area that you frequent or even the property of a beloved parent or friend. If you belong to a coven or other Pagan group, this ceremony will not only be a special bond for the people being wed but also serve to bring the entire group closer together as they support the couple in honoring the earth.

The ground should be prepared before the ceremony (especially if the couple doesn't want to muss their wedding clothes). As with the rose ceremony, the clergy person can remind them of their enduring love which will grow and mature as represented by the tree.

Pagans sometimes perform handfastings that are temporary such as the year and a day ceremony. Since this is not legally binding, a clergy person may or may not be involved in the rite.

Because of the simplicity and adaptability of the rose and tree ceremonies, they can be written and performed by the couple or a very small group which makes it all the more meaningful.

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Photo credit: Red rose: Florian Moeckel, Wikimedia Commons. Pink rose: Renathe Elisabeth Rudberg, sxc.hu. Oak tree: Gouwenaar, Wikimedia Commons.