1. Fight Club (book & movie)
2. Survivor
3. Haunted

We've all been there tired of our job, tired of our boring life. Well that's pretty much what gets the ball rolling in this novel by Chuck Palahniuk. I've been reading other novels by Mr. Palahniuk and decided to revisit the book that got me interested in him in the first place. Actually it was the movie of the same name starring Edward Norton and Brad Pitt, that got me interested in the book. This also launched my Edward Norton fanboy phase...but that's another blog altogether.

The narrator in this story is not only sick of his job and his boring life, but he's also seen that he's not the only one. Most people try to cover it with consumerism. This book sets out to prove we are not our jobs, we are not the stuff we own. But what are we?

To discover this the narrator crashes these self help groups, like "men with testicular cancer" "Brain Parasite survivors" and others. Somehow he never gets discovered as a "tourist" to these groups. But one day he runs into Marla. Marla seems to be a tourist just like him. He's upset with her because knowing she's a fake keeps him from "enjoying" the groups and his insomnia returns.

He then meets Tyler Durden. Tyler Durden is an artist at deviant behavior. Tyler has many low paying jobs and performs strange tasks just to create general mayhem. Examples of these are: splicing scenes of porn into Disney movies, Urinating in soup tureens where he works or urinating (or just stating that he urinated in) perfume bottles in which the catering company he is a waiter for is catering a party. Then the narrator's condo blows up and he has to move in with Tyler in a run down house on Paper Street. There are no other houses for miles around so they can do pretty much what they want. The house leaks when it rains, so much so that they have to turn off the electricity in the house when it rains to avoid any accidents. So going with this all the narrator has left is the few changes of clothing that were lost and then recovered by an airline. So has he sunk to bottom yet? No.

They then find that neither one of them have got into any fights in all their lives. So they fight each other. They then realize what it feels like to be human through the pain. Pretty soon they start fight club. In which all the men in the club are not who they are in the real world, but an individual on the fighting floor. Pretty soon black eyes, scars, stitches etc. begin to appear on people in the narrators every day life. But has he hit bottom yet?

In order to discover his humanity he first has to reach bottom. But first he and Tyler need money. So they make soap. Render the fat and mix lye and "ta-da" you have soap. But the fat they render is Marla's mom's fat that was liposuctions so Marla could get her collagen injections. It seems Marla and Tyler become a thing after Tyler saves her from a fake attempted suicide.

Well the soap is a huge success that they go to stealing liposuctioned bags of fat from a medical waste dump. The biggest buyers of the soap are big name, high end department stores. So basically he's selling the rich folks the same fat they pay big dollars to have removed. This money from the Paper Street Soap Co. goes to fund the next project. Project Mayhem.

Project Mayhem is one step further from fight club in that the members go out to show the world that they are not their jobs. They do things like destroying art, or fancy cars etc. At one point one of the narrators friends gets killed doing a Project Mayhem assignment. It's also at this point that Tyler Durden disappears. The narrator searches for Tyler, everytime he goes to a fight club everyone calls him "sir" and when asked if they've seen Tyler they all ask "Is this a test, sir?"

We then discover the secret to Tyler. In order to stop Project Mayhem (which has now reached nationwide) the narrator shoots himself with Tyler's gun. The book closes with the orderlies saying we can't wait for your return and Project Mayhem will soon be bigger than ever.

For those of you that have read the book or even seen the movie, you know the secret of Tyler Durden...but I will not give away that secret. It's more fun discovering that on your own...especially in the book. But I will list for you the rules of Fight Club and Project Mayhem. In the meantime discover Chuck Palahniuk, he's got some great lessons on society in this book.

1. You don't talk about fight club.
2. You don't talk about fight club.
3. When someone says stop, or goes limp, even if he's just faking it, the fight is over.
4. Only two guys to a fight.
5. One fight at a time.
6. They fight without shirts or shoes.
7. The fights go on as long as they have to.
8. If this is your first night at fight club, you have to fight.

1. You don't ask questions.
2. You don't ask questions.
3. No excuses.
4. No lies.
5. You have to trust Tyler.

I don't know what it is about nonlinear storytelling, but I seem to have a weak spot for it. Give me a good book or movie that is nonlinear and well you've got me hooked. Non-linear, for those who have yet to experience it, is when the story pretty much jumps around from past to present and back with no particular order. Chuck Palahniuk is one author that can pull this off and does so with his books, remember "Fight Club"? Either the book or movie "Fight Club" was a great example of nonlinear storytelling. Other Examples include; the movie "Pulp Fiction," Joseph Heller's Catch-22 (1961), Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five, and, Takashi Shimizu's Japanese horror series, Ju-on, brought to America as The Grudge, is also nonlinear in its storytelling.

This book, "Choke," by Chuck Palahniuk, is yet another nonlinear story. Told in first person (as was "Fight Club") the story captures the life of Victor Mancini and his friend Denny through a few months of their lives with frequent flashbacks to the days when Victor was a child. Victor grew up while going from one foster home to another. Victor's mother was found to be unfit to raise Victor. Several times throughout his childhood his mother would kidnap him from his various foster parents. They would eventually be caught and he would again be remanded over to the government child welfare agency. This part is all told/revealed as we go through Victor's modern life where, to say the least, he's a little screwed up in the head.

Victor's mother is dying in a retirement home and before she goes he wants to know more of who he is. With the help of Dr. Paige Marshall, Victor can help his mom live by creating a baby and harvest the cells to cure his mom. When Victor visits his mom he has to pretend to be various attorneys that represented her in the past because when he says he's himself she ignores him. Through the "attorney's" Victor discovers his mom kept a diary and it is revealed who victor is, but the catch, she wrote the diary in Italian. Paige Marshall says she can read Italian and proceeds to tell Victor that he is the son of Jesus. (Very interesting story in that one...but you'll have to read it to find out how.)

Also Victor is a recovering Sexaholic and attends meetings but can never get past step 4, which is where he needs to write in a journal all his past "exploits." The problem here is twofold, one that he is still writing and has numerous events to keep track of and two that his meetings are also great places to hook up with chicks.

Victor is out to save the world by creating heroes, also a good way to make extra cash. The heroes are folks that save Victor's life. Every night Victor forces himself to choke in a restaurant and the heroes that save his life are forever heroes with a story to tell their grandchildren. Yes, he intentionally chokes on food.

Throughout the book there are many hilarious moments between Victor and his many friends and foes, so with a strange mystery to solve, although the reader doesn't realize there's a mystery until the very end of the book, and the strange flashbacks, this book is a great read.

If you're interested the book was recently made into a movie and debuted at the Sundance Film Festival (2008) with rave reviews. The movie stars Sam Rockwell as Victor. Sam Rockwell is the one that portrayed Zaphod Beeblebrox in the 2005 film "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy." You can check out the trailer below.

The last book I reviewed by Chuck Palahniuk ("Choke"), I remarked about how I love non-linear story telling and that I appreciate especially the non-linear works of Mr. Palahniuk. This book I think was the perfect non-linear book. At first though I was let down by the time-line structure. Basically the book is a history of the would-be / could-be messianic character of Buster "Rant" Casey, told through anecdotes from various characters who knew Rant or in some cases technical/governmental advisers. It's not until about halfway through the book that you realize the beginning may be the ending, or the ending may be the middle or the end may be, or the middle may not have ever happened, or any combination thereof. At this point in reading, the book became more of a dark humorous novel to something of weird existentialism.

Basically Buster Casey's mom becomes pregnant with him at the age of 13 by what could be a stranger or maybe the man she later marries, Chet Casey. The rumors through the small town of Middletown, run rampant about the family, so anything could be true. As Buster grows up he leads a not so normal childhood. In order to either perpetuate or dispel myths told to little children, Buster creates some strange scenarios. Take for example the tooth fairy myth.

There is a time in Middletown's history when a squirt gun cost $50 and a candy bar could cost $500. This inflationary period is started by Buster Casey. When walking with his grandmother to church, a strange man tells Buster that he is his real father, and proceeds to tell Buster how he can receive untold wealth. Just after he tells him this, Buster's grandmother is bitten by a black widow spider in her church bonnet and dies. After this Buster and a friend gather empty paint cans from the townsfolk for a recycling drive for scouts. In some of these cans are rare coins worth thousands and hundreds of thousands of dollars. When a kid loses a tooth in town Buster would give the the kid a coin in which the kid would replace with the one from a parent. This could would be worth thousands and the parents couldn't say anything, because after all they are the ones that started the whole tooth fairy myth, and asking where the coins came from would be to admit to the lie of the tooth fairy, then Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and so on.

One year, on Halloween, Buster earns his nickname of "Rant." Every year the city puts on a Halloween haunted house and party. In the Haunted house the children dip their hands in cold macaroni and olives while blindfolded and told they are touching guts and eyeballs. (Remember those days of childhood?) Well Buster decides to spend some of his new found fortune and makes a rather large purchase from a local slaughterhouse. This Halloween the eyeballs, guts, blood etc. are real. The kids are covered in cows blood and guts at the party which is at the end of the maze that is the haunted house. The cake becomes covered in blood from eager hands, costumes become darkly stained from kids wiping off the sticky mess. Finally someone finds out that it is all real and a grand pukefest begins that covers the blood covered community center with a fresh layer of puke. Buster is then called Rant. Rant being the sound you make when you puke up when all has been puked.

Now keep in mind this history of Rant is told through the folks that were there. The book has many more such incidences until Rant finally graduates (or bribes his way out of high school) and moves to the city. This is the point where not only do you start to fully realize the non-linear aspect of the story but also a story of a futuristic distopian society in which there is a class war between those that live/work during the day (daytimers) and those that live/work during the night (nighttimers).
The nighttimers are the lower of the class system and the daytimers look down their noses to nighttimers.

Rant invades the nighttimer society not only throwing it in turmoil but also throwing daytimer society into turmoil along with it. Rant takes up with Party Crashers. These are nighttimers that in order to have fun they crash cars into each other, then milk the event by pretending to get out and argue with each other.

The pasttime of party crashing was started by the government when the government was trying to find ways to make traffic move more smoothly. The first thing the government found was the the biggest slowdown in heavy traffic was not the crash but the rubberneck effect of the passersby. They found this by having agents intentionally crash into each other and then record the results. Finding the rubberneck effect was the slowdown they then created DRVR Graphic Traffic Radio. A Radio station that not only told of wrecks but took calls from paramedics, police and rescue personnel and report on the injuries and describing them in full gory detail.

Well Graphic Traffic soon became a reporting station for the thrill seeking Party Crashers. The Party Crashers have rules, you can only crash into other Party Crashers, and to alert that you are Party Crashing you had to decorate your car to that night's theme. Honeymoon nights are when you decorate your car with shaving cream / tin cans etc. and write Just Married on your car, all passengers are dressed as brides, grooms or other members of a bridal party. Other themed nights are Christmas, Thanksgiving and so on.

Here also is where the weirdness begins. Rant, throughout his childhood, has always sought out being bitten by spiders, snakes, rabbits, coyotes, dogs and any other wild critter. Rant then becomes a carrier/spreader of rabies. Rant starts to infect all nighttimers and party crashers with rabies. Soon nighttimers infected with rabies begin infecting daytimers by maybe licking apples to be sold in a store etc.

After starting a major rabies epidemic Rant crashes his car off a cliff, but his body is never found.

This brings us to the beginning of the book and starts a section of the book where the story goes off in an extremely surprising science fiction/existentialistic view that will treat you with a great read. There are rumors that Chuck Palahniuk is writing a sequel to this book and with the cliffhanger/twisting ending I don't doubt this at all.

I'm not going to give too much up about the end of the book other than be ready for time traveling, creating immortals and gods and a never ending rabies epidemic that threatens the world. I think that I've only covered about 30% of this immense volume of work with my summary. So be prepared for fun.

I'm on a Chuck Palahniuk binge right now and I am glad of it. I first read one of his books back in 1999. It was "Fight Club," I was so impressed with the movie that I had to read the book. In fact I took my wife (at the time we were "dating") to see this movie to get her response, and based on her response we got married and have been happily married ever since. Yeah there's more to Fight Club than just beating up people (a lot more). But this is about "Haunted." Once again I've read another great novel by Chuck Palahniuk.

This book is branded as a "novel of stories." Which is to say it is a novel with 23 short stories interwoven through the plot of the book. The basic premise is that 17 individuals are "recruited" to attend a writer's retreat. A time away from the world to write that big masterpiece. Each of the would be writers at first seem just like normal people. Through the book they are referred to by nicknames. These nicknames are based on the stories they tell throughout the book. All except Mr. Brandon Whittier the old man (or is he) that "hosts" the retreat and his "assistant" Mrs. Tess Clark.

Here are the nicknames and stories and a brief description of each:

Brandon Whittier -"Dog Years", "Obsolete" -A wheelchair-bound rich man who owns the abandoned theatre and hosts the writer's retreat. Though he appears to be a very old man, he is in fact a 13 year old boy who suffers from progeria.

Tess Clark -"Post-Production", "The Nightmare Box", "Poster Child", "Cassandra" A failed amateur porn actress who has become Whittier's assistant to learn what happened to her daughter Cassandra at Whittier's last writer's retreat.

Saint Gut-Free - "Guts" An abnormally skinny man who lost part of his lower intestine in a masturbation accident.

Mother Nature "Foot Work" A reflexologist and homeopathic therapy expert who was once employed in prostitution based around her skills with reflexology. She has joined the retreat to escape the mafia, who are out to kill her for abandoning her job and being an accessory to the murder of her friends pimp.

Miss America "Green Room" A pregnant model who wants to become famous.

Lady Baglady (Evelyn Keyes) "Slumming" A rich woman who, along with her husband, used to pretend to be homeless to get over her boredom with being rich. After she and her husband witness a crime leading to the murder of a wealthy Brazilian heiress, her husband is murdered by the captors, and a string of homeless people are murdered in the search for her. She comes to the retreat to escape the people who want to kill her.

The Earl of Slander "Swan Song" A reporter who murders a former child star in order to write a Pulitzer Prize-winning article about his victim's hidden habits and supposed suicide.

The Duke of Vandals "Ambition" An amateur artist who sneaks paintings into museums. He later becomes a respected professional when he murders a famous artist as a favor to the man who funds the other artist. He has come to the retreat to escape the same fate as the other artist.

Director Denial "Exodus" The director of a police station. She brings with her a cat named Cora Reynolds, named after its former owner, a co-worker who killed herself trying to stop police officers from using anatomically correct dolls for sexual purposes.

Reverend Godless "Punch Drunk" A former soldier who, with a group of other soldiers, raises money by lip-syncing in drag and allowing people to assault him in order to fund a war on religion. This has to be my favorite story with some great humor and a very dark message.

The Matchmaker "Ritual" A man who dresses similar to a cowboy. He convinced his wife to marry him after hiring a male prostitute to ruin her idea of the perfect man.

Sister Vigilante "Civil Twilight" A religious woman who carries a bowling ball with which she may or may not have killed people.

Chef Assassin (Richard Talbott) "Product Placement" A professional chef who murders critics who write negative reviews of his cooking and blackmails knife manufacturers by threatening to tell the world that he uses only their knives to commit his deeds.

Comrade Snarky "Speaking Bitterness" A woman who is critical of other women's looks. When she was a child her parents divorced and her mother continually warned her that her father might sexually abuse her. This, however, never occurred but because of it she has been wary and critical of men for her entire life.

Agent Tattletale (Eugene Denton) "Crippled" A man who becomes temporarily crippled and tries to cheat the company he worked for out of worker's compensation after he recovers. After killing a man who was collecting evidence on him for the company, he takes that man's job and is almost killed by a woman who he spied on.

The Missing Link"Dissertation" A member of the Chewlah, a tribe of people who are, according to local rumor, able to transform into sasquatches..

The Countess Foresight (Claire Upton) "Something's Got to Give" A woman with psychic powers. She was arrested for murdering a man who she believed murdered Marilyn Monroe. She now wears an electronic tracking bracelet as part of the terms of her parole.

The Baroness Frostbite (Miss Leroy) "Hot Potting" A former employee of the White River Lodge who lost her lips to frostbite while trying to save someone from an accident at the hot springs nearby.

Miss Sneezy (Lisa Noonan) "Evil Spirits" A woman with chronic sinus problems. She claims to carry an incurable disease, and that she escaped from a government isolation facility. This one rings of Edgar Allen Poe's story "The Masque of the Red Death."

This book really is almost a spoof of all the "crap" you see on reality TV. Several strangers working together, forming alliances and competing for a prize. The prize here is the "masterpiece" to be written. They all get locked in and start creating their own horror. When the food goes bad, well they have to find food somewhere.

Basically you take Stephen King, Clive Barker, Edgar Allen Poe and sprinkle in some H.P. Lovecraft and this is what you get in this novel. Some of the stories contain dark humor that Chuck Palahniuk which is, it seems, a specialty of his, and some are haunting. They all, however have a great message about humanity.

As a little added bonus the paperback features a glow in the dark cover. And if you prefer audio books the audio book has sections read by many talented voices including my favorite, Scott Brick. Other readers include: Erik Darling, Arthur Morey, and Lorna Raver.

First of all...WOW!!! This book is definitely something that grabs hold of you and doesn't let go...even at the end you want more. "Survivor" is written by Chuck Palahniuk, the same author of "Fight Club" which was made into a great movie starring Ed Norton and Brad Pitt. Now as you may or may not remember "Fight Club" had a hidden message about how consumerism was destroying the world. Keeping to thatm "Survivor" has a not so hidden message about Religion, Celebrity status and again the consumerism are destroying human kind. Spoilers to come...so be warned.

Also like "Fight Club" this book begins at the end. Even the chapters appear in reverse...more of a countdown. At the opening of this book Tender Branson the last known survivor of the Creedish religious suicide cult, and Spiritual Leader of the world, is in a 747 he hijacked and is going to crash it into the Australian Outback. Before the ultimate end of his life he leaves a permanent record (on the plane's flight recorder, the "black box") about how he got to where he is and why he is not a mass murderer.

As Tender tells his story in the final minutes before the plane crash, it is unfolded how he became a victim of what I will call Americanism. Tender is a member of the Creedish religious sect, which, as the story unfolds, is discovered to be a front for white slavery. The first born male of every family is named Adam and all the other males are named Tender. All the females are named Bitty until they are married. All of the Tenders and most of the Bittys are sold to rich families as housekeepers. All their lives as children their education consists of such lessons as etiquette, and cleaning and household chores. The cult/sect appear as though they could be Mennonites.

When the sect/cult's secret is discovered by the FBI the entire sect commits mass suicide on their farm compound in Nebraska. The survivors that were sold to slavery slowly follow suit. The government sets up a Survivor retention program in order to keep the rest from committing suicide. Tender Branson is one of these survivors and soon becomes the only one.

Once it is discovered he is the only one the story really starts to rock and reel. A marketing agent then starts controlling Tender's life turning him into a Religious Leader. Tender becomes popular because of ideas that the public thinks are his but are actually the Agent's ideas, like his autobiography, the Book of Very Common Prayer (a book of prayer that will make life easier my favorite is the prayer for getting out of traffic), and the Tender Branson Sensitive Materials Sanitary Landfill (a 20,000 acre [80 km²] repository for America's outdated porn). As his popularity grows, Tender wants to kill himself in front of the whole world; but he can't find the right time to do so. So, he puts it off for later.

Before all this Tender has set up a Suicide hotline...okay, actually he prints up a bunch of stickers for a fake suicide hotline that is his personal phone number. Everyone that calls him he simply says, "Kill Yourself." This goes on until he is visiting the tomb of one of his "victims" and he meets the "victim's" sister, Fertility Hollis. Fertility Hollis has a great gift, She knows everything, she can see the future.

Tender's popularity starts to wane; and the Agent tells him that he needs a miracle to stay famous. Fertility meet's him in a men's room in a restaurant in Spokane, Washington (because she knows). She gives him a prediction to tell on TV that the public will notice when it comes true. It does, and Tender becomes even more famous as he uses Fertility's psychic powers as his own.

But Tender still wants to escape, especially when he finds his older (by 3.5 minutes) brother Adam is still alive and killed off all the Creedish survivors and all the people in Tender's life, and is now after Tender. The police suspect Tender of the murders and when Tender's agent is found murdered, they seek to arrest him...but not before a big show at halftime of the superbowl. But Tender gives one last prediction and the entire arena goes into turmoil and Tender escapes. Only to be stuck with Adam and Fertility. This leads to a cross country escape in a very unique mode of transportation (read the book to find this one out). Ultimately Tender is aboard a plane by himself getting ready to crash in Australia.

The humor in this book is dark, but funny. Okay, disturbingly funny.

Like this conversation between Tender and his agent:

This one time, the agent asked me where I saw myself in five years. Dead, I said. I see myself dead and rotting. Or ashes, I can see myself burned to ashes. I remember I had a loaded gun in my pocket. Just the two of us were standing in the back of a crowded, dark auditorium.

'I see myself dead and in hell.'

I remember I was planning to kill myself that night. It was the night of my first big public appearance. I told the agent, I figured I'd spend my first thousand years in hell in some entry-level position, but after that I wanted to move into management. Be a real team player. Hell is going to see enormous growth in market share over the next millennium, and I wanted to ride the crest.

The agent said that sounded pretty realistic.