Liar-Liar, Pants-on-Fire

I am no expert on the subject; however, I have an opinion based upon having been lied to and having told a few myself.

The obvious reason people lie is to keep from getting into trouble; to avoid taking responsibility for something unfavorable. Children do it almost daily... "Jeffrey did it! It wasn't me!" As adults we usually fall back on, "I don't know..." In the end it is the same thing.

But what about other purposes for telling a lie? How about to get someone else into trouble; blaming a person for something they didn't do?

Some people tell lies to make themselves appear bigger/better than they really are. These people tear others down to build themselves up. They are the gossip-mongers. They are the worst kind of liar, in my opinion. Not only do they tell lies, but they listen to them and perpetuate them.

These are those we call narcissistic. A narcissist must put others down, even for things they themselves do, in order to feel superior to those around them. So, they lie. They lie about themselves and eventually come to honestly believe the lies they tell. They become separated from reality.

They say negative things about the other people in their lives, while making up bigger-than-life fairy tales about themselves. They may strive to be someone else entirely. This is what I refer to as Adopt-a-Life. Selecting someone whom you admire, and strive to be that person. I'm not talking about finding a mentor, but in attempting to steal a person's life. Becoming them.

They trash the person they emulate, because they want to completely assume the identity of the other and "There isn't room in this town..."

Then there are those who lie to get something favorable that they wouldn't otherwise deserve. Cheating is a very common implemented lie. Most people don't even recognize it as a lie. But are you not telling a teacher that you know more than you do when you cheat on a test to get a higher grade? Cheaters are pretending to be better than they really are. In Las Vegas, cheaters pretend to better at games of chance in order to win money that they would not otherwise be deserving of.

Those who lie to advance themselves, are the most prolific liars around. Take the media for example and those who use the media to get their message out. These liars tell lies to incite fear in the hope that those they make afraid will allow them a position of power to change that which they fear.

These people use misinformation to advance their careers and to change things to be more to their liking. Take the republican party for example. They tell lies about the federal deficit, blaming Social Security for the lack of abundance in the coffers, but Social Security has nothing to do with the federal deficit. They lie about it to take benefits away from those who deserve them, so that they themselves can collect a bigger paycheck. Only in America can politicians give themselves a pay raise without the people voting on it. Some democracy. I sure would like to be able to vote myself a pay raise.

The ugly truth of the matter is that George W. Bush de-funded Social Security to pay for his war. Social Security was set up as a trust fund for retiring Americans who paid into the fund for their entire working lives. That money was not to be used for any other purpose. Our 43rd president stole that money. However, to look better to the public, Social Security has been blamed for the deficit. These lies are being told to keep certain people out of prison, where they belong.

The deficit is real, but the cause of it has been a lie. We would not even be discussing cutting Social Security if GWB had not spent eight years funding a war we were lied to to get into. We were told there were weapons of mas destruction when there were none and the president knew there were none. It was a lie to create fear and provide an excuse to invade. He did it as an ego trip that he took the whole country on. He is still telling lies to avoid going to jail.

Does telling lies hurt others? That depends upon the reason for the lie; the malice behind it. For instance, if I were to say that the sky is green and the grass blue, that would be a lie, but it is one that does no damage. For one thing, you would know that it wasn't true. There was no harm done because there was no malice behind saying it. What would I gain by its telling? Nothing. Now, if I were to say that your husband is cheating on you, and that was a lie, that would be harmful. That would hurt your relationship, and possibly ruin your reputations. Not just yours, but your husbands' too. There would have to be malice behind such a lie. What would the liar stand to gain? Possibly revenge for a perceived slight.

Telling lies is never a positive thing, even when it is done to spare another's feelings. Lies must be remembered so as not to cause contradictions in the future. Eventually the truth comes to light. When that happens, the liar is exposed and their yarns unravel. Who looks bad now?

Unfortunately, this type of vindication is a long time in coming. Therefore, it is best to just move on with life and do the best you can with what you've got.

I whined about my failed business and pointed the finger of blame, but I wasn't getting anywhere doing it. To be truthful, I was feeling sorry for myself.

Therefore, I resolved to rebuild my business. If I could build a good reputation once, I can do it again. However, this revelation came after I completed a few new ventures of my own. Had I not had the extra time on my hands, I would not have been able to write my book, 'Forever and Always...'

Having my reputation damaged allowed me the time and desire to go where I had not been before: outside my comfort zone. What did I write about? I wrote about my life. Write what you know is what they say, so I did. I wrote with passion and speed. I completed the first 30,000 words in a few weeks. You might say that the slander I suffered inspired me to tell my story. Mine is a story of survival, and considering all that I have survived in m life, this too shall pass.