The one thing that is so important but we all screw up. How many of us blame our parents for being screwed up? Yet guess what, we are all screwing up our kids in all different ways.

Never in the course of history have there been so many different opinions on parenting. Parents are so overwhelmed with everything that they are second, triple guessing themselves and not at all 100% confident that they are doing a good job. You want to know why, because no parent is doing it right 100% of the time.

Stop trying to be the perfect parent because no matter how much you try, you won't be. Just be the best parent you can be and be there for your children. Talk to them and listen to what they have to say. Spend time with them and forget about everything that needs to be done yesterday because there will always be something to do, your kids will not always be there.

My son is now 8 years old, he used to want to play with and near me, cuddling was our favorite thing to do. Now he spends more time in his room and with his friends then he does with us. It started at 5 years old, that's right the minute they start school they figure out they don't need you anymore. By the time the hit grade 3 they know more then you do and they'll tell you when your wrong.

Read parenting books for what they are, guidelines and ideas, not biblical truth. Some books have better ideas then others, what works for your friend may not work for you. Each child is different, each parent is different, each family is different. Unless your child is being neglected or abused you are doing it right if your child is happy and healthy. It doesn't matter how many activities they are in or how many toys they have, it matters how much of yourself you gave them. Take from others and books what rings true for you, what will work for you and push the rest to the side.

There is no right or wrong way if parenting is done with love. Books are good because they can help you develop a parenting toolbox. A new way to look at doing something. A different approach to try, just because your mom did it this way, doesn't make it the only way. Just because Susie's mom does something doesn't mean you have to. Jonny may need something different from his parents then Susie needs from hers.

Use parenting books as a resource, listen to your kids, love them, and stop beating yourself up trying to be perfect. Your a mom, not a Goddess. You are going to screw up, just be willing to say "I'm Sorry"

Do you have one child who gets in trouble a bit more than the other? One that is more talented, cuter, more popular? This is where things can get tricky. This is where time together gets more important then ever. Does one perceive that the other gets more or is more loved? Short of keeping a journal and list to make sure that each is provided the same amount of stuff, love and attention, it can be hard to keep perceived favortism out of the picture.

If your children seem to be unequal in gifts and talents, it is time for you to focus on the child who you perceive as having less. Time for you to put them into a variety of activities to find the one that they will shine in. Time for you to look and find the diamonds that need polishing and polish them. It's time for you to take a look at your attitude. Yes, your attitude. Do you view the interests and activities of that child as somehow not important, as lesser and not interesting to you? If a child loves something that you don't why should the child find interest in that what you are interested in? As the parent is it not your responsibility to make sure that you take in interest in what they are interested in. Ok so a night at the hockey game may be more fun for you but your child may be more interested in building models. Which do you think he would find most valuable and most esteem boosting? Time doing something dad likes to do or doing something he likes to do? I'm not saying that time with a child has to be all about their interests and talents, but the bulk of the time should be.

In todays world the amount of time we have for our kids is not huge, in fact it is a precious commodity. It is easier to spend time having fun with the child who's interests parallel yours, the trick is spending time with the one who is different, doing what the child likes. Showing an interest in both children's interests, talents and activities will help to alleviate the preceived favortism attitude that will erode a sibling relationship.

If one child's activities will take up so much more of your day to day time and resources at the expense of the other child how will this help their relationship? After all sibling rivalry is the fight for you, your love, and your attention. How would you feel if your spouse came home with another wife or husband for you to play with and share with. How would you feel? It's easy to pass it off as sibling rivalry and as one child being a whiner or overly sensitive, but guess what... you are the parent and it is your job to teach them how to get a long.

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