Phractured Philosophy: Chicken or Egg First?
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Two Eternal Questions That Have Frustrated Chickens for Centuries Examined . . .
2) Why did the chicken cross the road?
I know these conundrums have kept me awake many a night and caused me to loose focus during critical moments at work. I'd really like to get to the bottom of them. If you can help me out, please, leave your comments below.
Let's explore . . .
[Note: The philosopher's answers below, as to why the chicken crossed the road, came from www.philosophy.eserver.org, although I've seen them on other sites.]
She's heard that before . . .
Eggzistential Theater
Smokehouse 100% Natural Chicken Chips Dog Treats, 1 Pound Tub
Amazon Price: $18.99 (as of 07/05/2009)
Feed Fido!
What happens to those tough old birds that have laid their last egg and gone to the coop in the sky? Now you know.
Why'd the Chicken Cross the Road?
RALPH WALDO EMERSON SAID: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.HENRY DAVID THOREAU: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.
BUDDHA SAID: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
JACQUES DERRIDA SAID:
Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
Why'd the Chicken Cross the Road?
JOHANN VON GOETHE SAID: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.DAVID HUME SAID: Out of custom and habit.
MARK TWAIN SAID: The news of its crossing has been greatly eggs-aggerated.
WHITEHEAD SAID: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of misplaced concreteness.
CHICKEN MYTHOLOGY - THE HERO?
Chicken Licken
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
With this book, you can help Chicken Licken find his way to the king! Again. He keeps finding the king but then the whole scenario starts over. Again. You'd think C.L. would know the way by now. But still, he's a legend.
Littlest Pet Shop Pet Pairs Figures Kitty with Chick & Egg
Amazon Price: $9.95 (as of 07/05/2009)
If we want peace in the world, we'll have to realize it doesn't matter which came first, chicken or egg. Here's a toy that brings together a chick and an egg. It will stimulate open-mindedness and tolerance while your children play. Also comes with a kitty, although what that has to do with a chick and egg is a new mystery.
chicken eggs found in long abandoned nests!
Farmer Tom Eggsen found 3 old nests full of eggs, and claims he hasn't raised chickens for 15 yrs. "Had the coop boarded up," said Eggsen.
Philosophers from all over the world have flocked to Eggsen's farm, hoping to solve one of life's illusive mysteries. Or has a hoax been laid? (Aliens anyone?)
Chicken Crossing Sign
Amazon Price: $19.95 (as of 07/05/2009)
Use as home decor or place it where your favorite chickens cross the road. Better yet, buy two!
Why'd the Chicken Cross the Road?
PYRRHO THE SKEPTIC SAID: What road?THE SPHINX SAID: You tell me.
ZENO OF ELEA SAID: To prove it could never reach the other side.
JACK NICHOLSON SAID: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason.
FENG SHUI THE COOP
Ionic Salt Lamp Feng Shui Halite Egg, Fertility, Life
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
Nothing says I love you like an Ionic Salt Lamp Feng Shui Halite Egg. It stands for fertility and life. Make it an anniversary gift, or keep it buy the bed while trying to get pregnant. Or, buy it to spice up your living room.
This road gets more dangerous all the time!
Which side are you on?
Show your true colors!
Fetching blurbs now... please stand by
Disney's Chicken Little (Disney's Read Along)
Amazon Price: $7.99 (as of 07/05/2009)
Is there a budding philosopher in your family? Help him or her get started reading about important concepts with this CD and read-along book. Don't let the Disney trademark fool you. This is the real deal . . . very meaty!
How to Decorate Beautiful Ukrainian Easter Eggs (Pysanky) with Luba
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
Start a new hobby with eggs. This step by step book will show you how to make your home egg-tatstic! Make birthday and Christmas gifts also. Its hard to enhance the perfect shape of an egg, but this book will show you how.
Why'd the Chicken Cross the Road?
CHAUCER SAID: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.EMILY DICKINSON SAID: Because it could not stop for death.
BLAKE SAID: To see heaven in a wild fowl.
WORDSWORTH SAID: To wander lonely as a cloud.
Crazy Rooster Mardi Gras Party Hat
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
Why wait for Halloween? This hat looks fetching any time of year. Kids love it!
HENRIETTA, A LOCAL HEN, HIT BY CAR
Henrietta was alive when help arrived. She whispered, "I crossed the road . . . I crossed because . . ."
Sadly, Henrietta expired before revealing the most sought after answer in history. Family was miffed. One more word would've meant a bestseller, and perhaps a movie deal down the road.
I came first . . . no, I came first . . .
Decorated Egg Tin 3 pc set
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
Practical and pretty! Brighten your kitchen or bath with colorful tins. They come filled with soap and make a great gift for three different people if you're on a budget.
Also holds small candies, loose change, rings, paper clips, and bird seed, etc.
Why'd the Chicken Cross the Road?
PLATO SAID: For the greater good.HIPPOCRATES SAID: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.
ARISTOTLE SAID: To actualize its potential.
EPICURUS SAID: For fun. (Duh!)
Key Chain - Rubber Chicken
Amazon Price: $2.49 (as of 07/05/2009)
It never gets old. A great, inexpensive gift for co-workers, or that new driver in your family.
Comes in different sizes.
There IS something on the other side!
Green Eggs and Ham Book & CD (Book and CD)
Amazon Price: $9.95 (as of 07/05/2009)
Is your child or grandchild an egg lover? Get them the book that made eggs famous for the past 3 generations. Comes with CD also, in case you get tired of reading to your child.
No eggs were harmed when writing and illustrating this book.
STAUNCH CHICKEN SUPPORTER EGGED!
Roy Roosterian, a philosopher supporting the idea that chickens came first, was pelted with eggs while crossing the Acme College campus yesterday.
"As least I'm not on the fence about it, like many philosophers today," said Roosterian. "Its an honor to be yolk-slimed for my beliefs."
"Chicken or Egg First" Symposium
METAL CHICKEN PITCHER
Amazon Price: $5.49 (as of 07/05/2009)
It doesn't take much of a pitch to sell this charming pitcher. The colors and modern style peep for themselves.
Nietzche meets Aristotle
First the Egg (Caldecott Honor Book and Theodor Seuss Geisel Honor Book (Awards))
Amazon Price: $10.17 (as of 07/05/2009)
Where was this book when I was a kid? It might have saved me a lot of kinder-contemplation.
I wonder if the author uses the Socratic method?
Bookmark
Comments Welcome!
gmarlett wrote...
Chickens, eggs, road crossing, aarghhh! Welcome to the Parody and Satire Group.
Posted January 18, 2009
fefe wrote...
Fun lens, but I can't seem to decide if the chicken or the egg came first. Chickens come from eggs, yet eggs need a chicken to lay them. My head hurts.
Posted August 25, 2008
confetta wrote...
JUST FAB!
I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE MAKING SUCH BRILLIANT LENSES!
This one is TOP DRAWER! 5 STARS! YOU make me want
to make MY LENSES BETTER!!
YaY!
I am nominatin' this one!
Posted August 23, 2008
Chicken Lover's Bible
Keep Chickens! Tending Small Flocks in Cities, Suburbs, and Other Small Spaces
Amazon Price: $11.53 (as of 07/05/2009)
Any way you look at it, chickens are a star of the domestic household. They are easy and inexpensive to raise, they don't need much living space, and they provide eggs for free. No dog or cat on the planet can make the same claim.
Everything Chicken
A book for the book-lover who has everything . . .
The Complete Encyclopedia Of Chickens
Amazon Price: (as of 07/05/2009)
Wow - I wish every chicken book had so much information for so little money! I have long looked for a book that has identifying photos of various breeds, and this one is great! (Except they didn't mention my beloved Dominiques!). While it should not be your ONLY poultry book, it should absolutely be ONE of them! Don't forget to hug your chickens today! (Mussey, Amazon reviewer)
Chickens Extraordinaire
Who knew?
Extra Extraordinary Chickens
Amazon Price: $16.47 (as of 07/05/2009)
The striking images in Extraordinary Chickens showed that "the world of chickens is a world of wonders" (New York Times Book Review).
For breeders and enthusiasts, this volume will be a treasure they must own; for others it will be a revelation, worth having for the sheer enjoyment of the beautiful photographs and the wonderful birds they portray. (amazon)
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