Pre-Paid Legal Services: A Low Cost, Comprehensive Solution.
Ranked #22,774 in Business, #273,941 overall
Exciting Opportunities Await Managing You're Own Pre-Paid Legal Services Business
Additionally, we're looking for people just like you who might want to work a few hours a week as an associate of Pre-Paid Legal Services and sign up others for the many benefits our services provide, as well as recruit others to become associates members too. If you're willing to invest 2-3 hours a day each month into the program, you can make an extra $500 to $1,000 a month - wouldn't that be a nice extra bit of spending money? CALL ME TODAY & START TOMORROW: 518-772-0570.
Lawrence Elliott
Associate
Pre-Paid Legal Services, Inc.
84 Garage Place Road
Ghent, NY 12075-1203
Toll-Free: 888.855.7798
Phone/Fax: 518.772.0570
Cell: 518.821.4044
ll_elliott@msn.com
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Pre-Paid Legal Services Provides Its Members with A Full-Service Team of Quality Attorneys
Our Company & Our Provider Law Firms Share A Single Passion - Making the Law Work For You!
Pre-Paid Legal Service's low cost monthly, no contract, fees make the legal system available to those who never thought they could afford the may services our provider attorneys provide. WE ELIMIATE THE THREE REASONS WHY PEOPLE DON'T SEEK LEGAL COUNSEL.
- They're intimidated by the legal system
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- They're afraid of how much it will cost
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What Makes Pre-Paid Legal Services So Unique?
We offer legal flexibility and quality law firms at a low monthly fee that no one else can - and we've been doing it for more than 30 years!
Pre-Paid Legal Services, Inc., began over thirty-years-ago built on the same principles we offer today - a low monthly cost for your life events legal needs. Today our company has well over 1.2 million members and is listed on the New York Stock Exchange (PPL).
There are no contracts to sign, you pay month-to-month as long as you need our services. We have pre-existing associations with some of the finest law firms across the US and Canada ready at a moments notice 24/7 to handle your unique legal situations.
Some of these services include: Motor Vehicle Legal Services ^ Trial Defense Services ^ Identity Theft Shield & Identity Restoration ^ Phone Consultation ^ Letters & Phone Calls ^ Contracts & Document Review ^ Will Preparation ^ Small Claims Court Advice ^ Living Will Preparation ^ Health Care Proxy ^ Review of Leases & other Documents.
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- Pre-Paid Legal Services Provides Its Members with A Full-Service Team of Quality Attorneys
- What Makes Pre-Paid Legal Services So Unique?
- New Link List
- Don't Put Off Getting Your Will Made or Health Proxy Set Up
- P.P.S. Here's the link to my site
- Reader Feedback
- All New Series, "Little Miss Perfect" on WEtv!
- Looking for a rewarding part-time job you can manage from home?
- Pre-Paid Legal Listed on Googel
- Add Your Own Lens, Or Even Someone Else's Lens.
- New Video: Jonas Brothers Break Up
- New Video: Sorry Vagas
- Msc.com's Most Peculiar Stories of 2008
- In the amusing and highly riveting, perplexing & witty coming of age tale from "Hunting Unicorns," emerges ...
- Pre-Paid Legal Will Double Your Commissions Now!
- Vinettes...Parables...Aphorisms...Trivia..........
- Why Have A Pre-Paid Life Events Legal Plan (SN)?
- MSN's Top 10 Movies for 2008
- Obama hails 'extraordinary gathering'
- Top dog and cat names of 2008
- Can't Get A Date? It's Not Them, It's You.
- New Guestbook
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All New Series, "Little Miss Perfect" on WEtv!
Little Miss Perfect is a journey into the world of children's pageants
Little Miss Perfect is a journey into the world of children's pageants. Each episode follows two families as they practice and primp-all leading up to the stress and joy of competing for the title Little Miss Perfect. Featuring Michael Galanes, national pageant director for more than ten years! Go to wetv.com/littlemissperfect for blogs and exclusive videos!
Premieres February 17 at 10p/9c on WEtv!
Category: Entertainment
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1HRfy4xxko
Tags: pageant girls little miss perfect wetv wetv beauty beauty pageant miss america
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byLooking for a rewarding part-time job you can manage from home?
Check out joining one of the fastest growing industries - Pre-Paid Legal Services
Pre-Paid Legal Services offers two exciting opportunities. The first is the availability of having an attorney on your side at a cost everyone can afford. You can have the peace of mind and assurance that you can pick up the phone anytime to get answers to your questions without worrying about how much it's going to cost - because it's all included in that one low monthly fee.Additionally, we're looking for people just like you who might want to work a few hours a week as an associate of Pre-Paid Legal Services and sign up others for the many benefits our services provide, as well as recruit others to become associates members too. If you're willing to invest 2-3 hours a day each month into the program, you can make an extra $500 to $1,000 a month - wouldn't that be a nice bit of extra spending money? CALL ME TODAY & START TOMORROW: 518-772-0570. Or email me at ll_elliott@msn.com for more information. // Lawrence Elliott
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Msc.com's Most Peculiar Stories of 2008
You picked 'em! Find out what stories you chose as the year's wackiest
In the amusing and highly riveting, perplexing & witty coming of age tale from "Hunting Unicorns," emerges ...
a dire and chilly narration of a young lad on the verge of a discovery.
A discovery that scholars and religious have debated for centuries -- what is it that we need to give us meaing in life. For our hauted boy the answer lies in two simple words -- Comfortably Security. I penned a poem to reflect the romantic idealism he felt and held so dearly onto those two precious words.
Comfortable Security
© Lawrence Elliott, 2007
Sleep measures courage for a little boy
As his meshed blond hair rests cosseted on a pillow
Fear creeps nightly into his cozy room
Dark shadows lurk behind closet doors
Ghostly images certain to spawn screams
As rattles and creaking wood steals the silence
Hiding beneath familiar protective covers
Monsters disappear as peeping eye (lids yield to closure)
Sleeping innocently unaware of harms way
Watched tenderly made sure by a mother's nightly kiss
Rufus's cold nose to nestle against buttery soft legs
Poised to growl if danger skulks near his boy master
Tonight comfortable security filters through dreams
Like hitting a home run and flying through the skies
Another slumber in which nightmares hung at bay
Magically drifting past the howls of the darkness
Bright flames of light play against windowpanes
Immersed in cobwebby fluttering eyes
Yawns greet the morning's sure sanctuary
Turning over to hug his feathered pillow tight
Kisses moisten the forehead as shades roll up
Summing warmth frozen in childhood's comfortable security
# # #
Pre-Paid Legal Will Double Your Commissions Now!
Brian Carruthers, PPL Founder, CEO & Chairman Makes New Announcement Jan. 2nd

Junior Associates & Associates in PPL: This is great news that BENEFITS YOU from the NEW "Fast Start" Program just launched on January 2, 2009. In order for you to move up from Level One (Junior/CFT Associate) at $34 commission OR Level 3 (Associate) at $69 commission... up to the Level 4 (SENIOR ASSOCIATE) at $138 commission... YOU need to recruit just ONE $249 Fast Start Associate with membership! In other words, if you are not yet at Senior Associate, you are being given the chance right now to go get one $249 Fast Start recruit and you will get bumped up to SA, thus DOUBLING or QUADRUPLING your commission dollars! Are you ready to do this?
2009 CAN be a breakout year if you decide it will be.... and Pre-Paid Legal can be your answer. Click the following link or copy it into your browser to sign-up: https://www.iact1.com/ppl-iact/index.cfm?FuseAction=TelevoxRegistration.Welcome
Vinettes...Parables...Aphorisms...Trivia..........
In the oceans, photosynthesis is carried on mainly by algae . Long before anything could live out of water, these plant dynamos did most of the work of changing the earth's atmosphere from poisonous gases to breathable air--a process which probably took some 2 1/2 billion years. Today, tiny algae called diatoms carry on the bulk of aquatic photosynthesis.(Rutherford Platt, The Living World of Nature , p. 235)
The honey ant of the desert has an unusual method of providing food in times of scarcity. Certain members of the colony are stuffed with liquid food or water until the rear portions of their bodies are enlarged to the size of a pea. When a famine occurs, these ants disgorge their supplies to feed the others. (Isaac Asimov's Book of Facts, p. 87)
When one bacterium encounters another, it often extends a threadlike tube to the other through which it exchanges secondhand genes in the form of plasmids, rings of non-nuclear DNA.
If one bacterium survives assault by a new antibiotic, it can quickly share its method of resistance by passing plasmids that contain such information to other bacteria. Through such sharing, antibiotic resistance spreads swiftly through the microscopic world. (Lowell Ponte, in Reader's Digest )
Know this, dear, that I know I must be beautiful within, and in my fellowship with others, and in my sharing with them the good things of life if I am to become beautiful without. Anything that makes me have the feeling of selfishness cannot result in more beauty to me. Anything that awakens in me the loving desire to have others happy and adorned with beautiful things, and anything that helps me to express this loving desire in my own living is sure to bring forth its fruit in my own life. Now, I am sure that you understand, and approve my passing on to another the use of the beautiful gift that you with so much love sent to me. You did mean for me to use it in the way it would give me most joy, didn't you? (Myrtle Fillmore)
A book is one of the few gifts you can give which can be opened more than once. (Catherine Ponder, Keys to Prosperity )
Luther Burbank , the plant breeder, gave us at least ten new varieties of berries as well as new varieties of apples, cherries, peaches, quinces, and nectarines, and half a hundred new varieties of lilies and other flowers. He also gave us new tomatoes, corn, squash, peas, asparagus, and, of course, the great Burbank potato.
His only motive for contributing this wealth to us was his philosophy: "I shall be content if, because of me, there shall be better fruits and fairer flowers."(Bernie Smith, The Joy of Trivia , p. 41)
One sweltering day, I was scooping ice cream into cones and told my four children they could " buy " a cone from me for a hug. Almost immediately, the kids lined up to make their purchases. The three youngest each gave me a quick hug, grabbed their cones and raced back outside. But when my teen-age son at the end of the line finally got his turn to "buy" his ice cream, he gave two hugs. "Keep the change," he said with a smile.
(Nancy Gallets, in Reader's Digest )
Andrew Carnegie arrived from Scotland penniless, got a job in a Pittsburgh steel mill for $4.80 a month, and fifty years later retired with a guaranteed income of one million dollars per month. He gave away 90% of his fortune before he died in 1911, to good causes, of course . . . such as public libraries, among many others. (Bernie Smith, The Joy of Trivia , p. 40)
For his entire forty-seven years in government, Herbert Hoover turned over each of his Federal salary checks to charity. He had become independently wealthy before entering politics.
(David Louis, Fascinating Facts , p.. 136)
A year's supply of chocolate bars has been left to the young children of Westgate, England. In this small country village, a local farmer who died childless specified in his will that a bar of chocolate should be handed out every week, for a year from the date of his death, to each village child less than five years old. (Bertram B. Johansson, The Christian Science Monitor )
Albert Schweitzer is what service is all about. He gave up a prestigious career as a doctor and went to Africa to build hospitals for the poor natives. Many of his friends, who felt that he was throwing away his talents and training, sent a delegation to Africa to attempt to persuade him to come back to his native land. They asked, "Why should such a gifted man as you give up so much to labor among African natives?"
Schweitzer replied: "Don't talk about sacrifice. What does it matter where one goes provided one can do good work there? Much as I appreciate your kind words, I have made up my mind to stay here and look after my African friends." He remained there until he died in 1965, at the age of 90. He worked until the very end, maintaining his zest for living.
(Joe Griffith, Speaker's Library of Business , p. 290)
What it would cost annually to duplicate what earth does naturally: Natural flood control --would cost $1.8 trillion; plant pollination --would cost $117 billion; waste treatment --would cost $2.27 trillion; soil creation --would cost $53 billion; ocean processing of chemicals --would cost $17 trillion.
(University of Stockholm Department of Systems Ecology)
Elvis Presley did not die with a fortune; he spent nearly all he made.
The stories are legion: Elvis standing beside two daydreaming newlyweds in a Cadillac showroom. "Which one do you like?" he asks. They point and he says, "Get in, it's yours." Or the young Elvis, a skinny kid with ridiculous sideburns, brushed off by the salesman, going out to ask an elderly man washing down new models, "Caddy a good car?" The man nods. Elvis marches him up to the sales manager and says, "This gentleman sold me on that convertible over there, so I'm buying two, one for me and one for him. And he's to have commission on both."
Every Christmas he gave $1000 each to 50 Memphis charities, but no one will ever know the number of people whose businesses he rescued, or the tornado victims to whom he sent house trailers or the destitute whose hospital bills he paid. He thought that's what money was for.
(Lawrence Elliott, in Reader's Digest )
Years later, the woman described the incident: "When dinner was served, Mr. Fillmore, like any father serving his little girl who was hungry, took a spoon and served half his dish of berries to me. Then, when I was about to leave, without my asking, he let me have twenty dollars to help me with my expenses and carried me back to Kansas City in his pretty new red car."
(James Dillet Freeman, The Story of Unity , p. 148)
The first nation to receive foreign aid from the United States was Venezuela. In 1812, Venezuela, fighting for its independence from Spain, suffered a severe and damaging earthquake. Congress appropriated $50,000 to help the victims. (Isaac Asimov's Book of Facts, p. 448)
The day of her party, Nancy sat with friends gathered round her and slowly, gratefully, opened every present. There was a beautiful scarf, and she tried it on, relishing the luxury of the silk. She opened a candle and inhaled the delicate floral scent. Then she laid all her presents out on the table and looked around at her friends . "Right now I'm not in a gathering period in my life; I'm in a relinquishing period, and I'm learning how beautiful this can be. What I want for you each to do now is select a gift that you didn't bring and take that gift home with you. All the years you live, remember my love for you whenever you see this gift."
Nancy died six weeks later. Maybe her days were fewer than she and her friends and family would have liked, yet her life was abundantly full.
(Mary Manin Morrissey, Building Your Field of Dreams , p. 137)
Giving is mentioned over 300 times in the New Testament. It's one of the most talked about subjects, running neck and neck with the Second Coming. (Johnston/Rank, God Can Make It Happen , p. 77)
The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own. (Benjamin Disraeli)
Since 1950, Rev. Billy Graham has accepted no speaking fees or honoraria and has given away the royalties on 15 of his 17 books.
(Colin Greer, in Parade magazine)
The night before our son's wedding, we were in the church for the rehearsal. Everyone was tired and a bit slap-happy during the final walk-through. Our son was standing at the altar waiting for his bride-to-be to come down the aisle with her father. Reaching the altar, the father of the bride turned to my son and said, "This is where I take her hand out of my pocket and put it in yours." (Marjorie Stright, in Reader's Digest )
Dwight L. Moody tells the story of a blind man in a large city sitting at a street corner with a lantern beside him. A passerby noticed the man and inquired why he had a lantern, since he was blind and the light of it was the same as the darkness. The blind man simply replied, "So that no one may stumble over me. (Glenn Van Ekeren, Speaker's Sourcebook II , p. 133)
After lecturing her six-year-old on the golden rule, the mother concluded, "Always remember that we are in this world to help others?" The youngster mulled this over for a minute and then asked, "What are the others here for?" (Beulah Collins, For Benefit of Clergy )
After the British burned down Washington in the War of 1812, Thomas Jefferson gave his personal library, which became the foundation of the Library of Congress . (Robert C. Baron, historian)
Like most teen-agers, our son David, who had just received his Illinois driver's license , seized every opportunity to get behind the wheel of the family car. Offering to run errands, he asked, "Does anyone need anything from the market, the mall . . . or Indiana?" (Jane Hardan, in Reader's Digest )
An acre of large, healthy maples puts 20,000 gallons of water into the air each day. Without trees our entire world would be a much
Why Have A Pre-Paid Life Events Legal Plan (SN)?
Because it will give you access to quality law firms for $26 a month.
Have you ever...> Been overcharged for a repair?
> Received a speeding ticket?
> Purchased a home?
>Tried to return a defective product?
> Lost a security deposit?
> Signed a contract?
> Prepared a will?
Most people have ... and did nothing
-
Pre-Paid Legal Services: A Low Cost, Comprehensive Solution.
-
Pre-Paid Legal Services offers two exciting opportunities. The first is the availability of having an attorney on your side at a cost everyone can afford. You can have the peace of mind and assurance that you can pick up the phone anytime to get answ...
MSN's Top 10 Movies for 2008
How Did Your Favorites Make Out?

[Number 6. "The Dark Knight" with Christian Bale as Batman & his
historical archrival the Joker played by the late Heath Ledger.]
10. "Slumdog Millionaire" (Fox Searchlight) 9. "Wendy and Lucy" (Oscilloscope Pictures) 8. "WALL-E" (Disney) 7. "Pineapple Express" (Sony Pictures)
6. "The Dark Knight" (Warner Brothers) 5. "Let the Right One In" (Magnet Releasing) 4. "The Edge of Heaven" (Strand Releasing) 3. "In Bruges" (Focus Features) 2. "The Wrestler" (Fox Searchlight) 1. "A Christmas Tale" (IFC Films)
Just Missed:
"Milk"; "I've Loved You for So Long"; "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"; "Happy-Go-Lucky"; "Che"; "Ballast"; "Man on Wire"
What is your favorite film of 2008? Are we crazy? Write us at heymsn@microsoft.com
Obama hails 'extraordinary gathering'
First White House reunion of all living former U.S. leaders since 1981
Presidents meet in Oval Office Jan. 7: President George W. Bush hosts President-elect Obama as well as former Presidents Clinton, Bush Sr. and Carter at the White House for lunch. MSNBCWASHINGTON - President-elect Barack Obama hailed a rare Oval Office gathering of all U.S. presidents as an extraordinary event on Wednesday as the current occupant, President George W. Bush, reminded his predecessors and successor that the office "transcends the individual."
"I just want to thank the president for hosting us," the president-elect said, flanked by former President George H.W. Bush on one side and his son on the other.
Presidents Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter, both smiling broadly, stood with them.
"All the gentlemen here understand both the pressures and possibilities of this office," Obama said. "For me to have the opportunity to get advice, good counsel and fellowship with these individuals is extraordinary."
In a swift photo opportunity, the current president wished Obama well before all five men headed to a private lunch that lasted about 90 minutes.
"I want to thank the president-elect for joining the ex-presidents for lunch," Bush said, even though he's not quite a member of that club yet.
"One message that I have and I think we all share is that we want you to succeed. Whether we're Democrat or Republican we care deeply about this country," Bush said. "All of us who have served in this office understand that the office itself transcends the individual."
He added: "We wish you all the very best, and so does the country."
Bush and Obama also met privately for roughly 30 minutes. That one-on-one meeting, coming just 13 days before Obama's inauguration, likely focused on grim current events, with war in the Gaza Strip and the economy in a recession.
It had been an entire generation since the nation last saw the tableau of every U.S. president together at the White House. The presidents have gathered at other locations over the years, most recently for the funeral of President Gerald Ford in Washington.
Obama suggested holding the gathering when he met Bush at the White House in November.
All parties seemed determined to keep details of what was discussed confidential.
Describing the lunch only in broad terms after it ended, Obama press secretary Robert Gibbs said: "The president and the former presidents had helpful advice on managing the office, as well as thoughts on the critical issues facing the country right now. The president-elect is anxious to stay in touch with all of them in the coming years."
Obama has sought to strike a balance as the power curve bends his way. Before taking office, he is publicly rallying Congress behind a massive economic stimulus plan. But he remains deferential to Bush on foreign affairs and will not comment on Israel's deadly conflict with Hamas on grounds that doing so would be dangerous for the United States.
"You can't have two administrations running foreign policy at the same time," Obama said at a news conference earlier in the day.
Vice President-elect Joe Biden also held a private meeting with former President Bush at the White House on Wednesday.
'We'll just share war stories'
Considering the bond they hold in history, U.S. presidents get together infrequently, particularly at the White House. And when they are in the same room, it is usually for a milestone or somber moment - a funeral of a world leader, an opening of a presidential library, a commemoration of history.
Not this time.
"It's going to be an interesting lunch," Bush told an interviewer recently. When asked what the five men would talk about, Bush said: "I don't know. I'm sure (Obama's) going to ask us all questions, I would guess. If not, we'll just share war stories."
They have plenty of those, political and otherwise. Their paths to power have long been entwined.
Carter lost the presidency to Ronald Reagan, whose running mate was George H.W. Bush. Bush later won election but lost after one term to Clinton. Then Bush's son, the current president, defeated Clinton's vice president, Al Gore. And this year Obama won after long linking his opponent, John McCain, to Bush.
Campaign rivalries
Those campaign rivalries tend to soften over time as presidents leave the White House and try to adopt the role of statesmen - although Carter, even as an ex-president, has had some critical public words for the current president's foreign policy.
All five men were to pose for a group photo in the Rose Garden, but a January rainstorm scrapped that plan. So the noontime photo opportunity - the media's only glimpse of them - was moved indoors to the Oval Office.
The presidents and Obama were having lunch in a private dining room off the Oval Office, where no one else was expected to join them.
"All of us would love to be flies on the wall and listening to that conversation," White House press secretary Dana Perino said.
The rare presidential joint appearance also offered Bush, who ends his two terms deeply unpopular, to again show he is rising above the fray.
The last White House event to draw the former presidents was a November 2000 celebration in honor of the White House's 200th anniversary. But one of the former presidents, Ronald Reagan, who was afflicted with Alzheimer's, was unable to attend.
All the presidents were last at the White House in 1981: Richard Nixon, Ford, Carter and Reagan, who was president then. The three former presidents were there before leaving as part of the U.S. delegation to the funeral of Egypt's Anwar Sadat, who had been assassinated.
Copyright 2009 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
Top dog and cat names of 2008
See which names were paws-down most popular -
It's raining namesMove over, Fluffy and Fido. There's a new batch of pet names in town: "people" names!
Veterinary Pet Insurance (VPI), the nation's largest and oldest provider of pet health insurance, scoured its database of more than 466,000 insured pets to find the most popular dog and cat names of 2008. (Animals not insured by VPI were not included in the survey.)
The Top 10 Most Popular Dog Names for 2008:
1. Max
2. Bailey
3. Bella
4. Molly
5. Lucy
6. Buddy
7. Maggie
8. Daisy
9. Sophie
10. Chloe
The Top 10 Most Unusual Dog Names for 2008:
1. Rush Limbark
2. Sirius Lee Handsome
3. Rafikikadiki
4. Low Jack
5. Meatwad
6. Peanut Wigglebutt
7. Scuddles Unterfuss
8. Sophie Touch & Pee
9. Admiral Toot
10. Spatula
***NOTE: I happen to think my cocker spaniel's name should have made the list - his name is Phidias! Any guesses for whom he is named after???
The Top 10 Most Popular Cat Names for 2008:
1. Max
2. Chloe
3. Tigger
4. Tiger
5. Lucy
6. Smokey
7. Oliver
8. Bella
9. Shadow
10. Charlie
The Top 10 Most Unusual Cat Names for 2008:
1. Edward Scissorpaws
2. Sir Lix-a-lot
3. Optimus Prrrime
4. Buddah Pest
5. Snoop Kitty Kitty
6. Miss Fuzzbutt
7. 80 Bucks
8. Sparklemonkey
9. Rosie Posie Prozac
10. Toot Uncommon
*** My vote goes to Zamboni (the name of the machine that is used on ice rinks) and Puck (the disk hockey players slam around!).
Can't Get A Date? It's Not Them, It's You.
Matchmaker Patti Novak gets brutally honest on how to 'Get Over Yourself'
Patti Novak, star of the A & E series "Confessions of a Matchmaker," says that finding true love isn't about having the right shoes or a flat stomach - it's about being ready. In her new book, "Get Over Yourself" she breaks down how to get yourself ready to date by first understanding and fixing your own problems. In this excerpt, she diagnoses some common dating problems and explains the underlying causes.Self-Diagnosis: Identifying the true problem behind your behavior so you can stop it, fix it, and get over it
Chances are, if you're having trouble dating, you - and you alone - have something to do with it. People often think the problem is external - "My dates have all been jerks" is a common reason I hear for why things never work out - but I can tell you from years of experience that while external factors play a part, most of the time, most people's problems with dating and finding love are their own.
Like agreeing to date jerks!
If you can't make it to a good matchmaker or a good life coach or a good therapist, anything that gets you to look at yourself and your behavior - and gets you in the habit of being more self-aware and self-reflective - can be tremendously helpful when embarking on the search for love. Which is why identifying yourself and the types of people you commonly date is so important.
There's an appendix at the back of the book called "A Field Guide to Dating Types," which you can refer to as you read on. Spend some time there to find out what type of dater you are and what type of dater has been your type.
Identifying your problem behaviors in dating - figuring out if it's your tough-girl attitude that's turning men off, or your controlling behavior that's turning women off, to name only two annoying and problematic behaviors - is a very important step.
Dating trouble isn't the problem- It's a symptom of other problems.
This is crucial to understand: If you're having trouble finding love, chances are dating is not your main problem. Chances are your trouble with dating is a symptom of other problems - larger, deeper emotional issues that are at the core of who you are.
Those larger and deeper emotional issues - your core - will be covered in depth in the next section of the book, but first you need to identify them. Taking a cold, hard look at yourself and developing a deeper understanding of who you are and why is one of the most important and fundamental parts of the process of finding love. Many of the people who come to me show up because they've spent much of their life avoiding themselves and not looking at what their own issues are and why they have them. They've spent years having trouble in relationships or not having any relationships because they've been too afraid to sit themselves down and try to get to the true cause of their dating difficulties.
The problem with avoiding your core is that it eventually catches up with you. You can run but you can't hide from the fiber of your being - your childhood, your hurts, your wounds, the relationships that have formed you and made you who you are today, good or bad. Almost everyone tries to outrun their past, but eventually you will arrive at a point at which you know there's nowhere left to go but inside.
Some problems are easier to solve than others. Some clients come to me with issues that are relatively easy to fix once those issues are identified.
Maybe it's a question of low self-esteem for someone who has gained weight after a bad breakup or after a long period of being alone. Starting a fitness program or weight loss program might be just the spark they need to get them back on track and feeling better about themselves. Maybe it's a question of making some adjustments in clothes and makeup to stop sending the wrong message. Choosing clothes that aren't as provocative and revealing and toning down the mannequin-like makeup can help someone stop attracting the wrong kind of guy. I'm not saying don't be sexy - I'm just saying less is more.
Some other issues - usually of trust or social awkwardness or deep emotional scarring - require more help than a matchmaker can give, which is why I'll often suggest to someone whose problems are of a sensitive nature or seem very deep- seated that they seek professional counseling from a trained therapist who can help them on a level that I can't.
But for most of the people I see and for most of you reading this book, a few basic, fundamental - and relatively easy to fix - problems are the most common causes of dating difficulties.
Problem behaviors in dating = self-protective behaviors
Once you've identified your problem behavior(s), you need to connect the dots to what's behind them and to understand what emotional wounds or painful life experiences have caused you to develop these behaviors. Connecting those dots won't solve your problems instantly. It might take awhile to change your behavior and make peace with some of your issues, but it's still a crucial step in understanding that your behavior and emotional health are contributing factors in your relationship history.
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- Jan 3, 2010 @ 4:17 am
- Thanks for providing this information was of great help for my needs, more information like this is needed, hope you have some more thanks again
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