Putting Off Procrastinating

Plus I keep putting off procrastinating until tomorrow.

We'll get to the root of this one, challenge it, make it less powerful...and you and I will feel like we soared above all this mess.

Not many of us can truly say that we don't have a problem with procrastination; and yet, none of us dare admit it. Even animals procrastinate; rest assured, it is a universal problem. We are not alone.

I used to try to get our cat to chase after a toy on a string. She did (as a kitten) but as she became older, she knew better. She would wait in a common area where she knew our paths would cross (with the toy)...and then pounce. In effect, she saved her energy..she worked smarter, not harder. Was she avoiding all the 'hard' work? Is this perhaps the 'good side' of procrastination?

Another thing, I was flipping through the channels the other day and caught a bit of a show about hoarders. Have you seen this? One lady claimed she was a 'rescuer of things'. Ah come on, some of the stuff kept had no practical use at all (and was hardly sentimental); one person wouldn't clean up the pet hair on his rugs, nor clean his dog's pooh around the house, because, he felt, "I might be speeding up my dog's death somehow." What a cop out. I think their excuses are crap and they are just lazy. Now, if you say, collected some kind of memorabilia, like prized collector's items or artifacts from ancient burial grounds or something, maybe I would 'get it.'

What is the root cause? Is it steeped in childhood trauma? Some form of mental illness? Do some feel that certain work is 'beneath them'? Could it be a rebellious expression, or is it just plain laziness?

So, a couple of theories keep being mentioned as the root causes of why we procrastinate. They are: procrastination is rooted in fear (perceived or real) and procrastination is simply an extension of the unconscious mind controlling our behavior. Some experts believe that our unconscious mind is, in fact, more powerful than our conscious mind.

I'd like to throw in a third theory: the job itself sucks and there is nothing enjoyable at all about doing it. I've been in the position many times where I felt like the only one who would tackle things which needed to be done (mostly to keep my child safe and healthy). I will detail to you what truly worked for me (and what I had to do to motivate others in my life..who I would lovingly refer to as the most lazy pieces of work on the planet).

One Christmas, my brother Phil was fixing himself a coffee. The milk bag was getting low, but instead of putting all of the milk in his coffee, he put about half his usual amount. Then, he carefully placed the almost empty milk container back into the fridge. For a second, he caught a glimpse of me studying this. When I called him on it, 'Don't wanna change the milk bag, eh?' He announced, "Of course." We laughed.

Could part of procrastinator's mindset be 'Ah, someone else can do it'. This can become a very bad habit that is re-enforced by someone who always cleans up after the procrastinator. Mothers often bear the brunt of this, it is somehow silently accepted or understood within our society that a woman will clean up after the kid. Problem is, when that kid is an adult..it can be an unconscious habit (for both parties). Even highly educated people surround themselves with their "mother replacements." Men and women are both capable to clean up after themselves. Teach your children to be self-sufficient, it will save them some heartache down the road. For I know many examples of people who finally leave a marriage because they had to do all or most of the dirty work. It becomes fairly demeaning to be the one who always has to clean up every mess.

This section lends itself quite nicely to the next observation I have made over the years...what I call the "bare minimum" people.

I suppose I have been lucky to have a few really good friends. People that are really hard workers and give everything their 'all'. They are some of the most interesting and lively types in their 30's, 40's and 50's. In my travels, I have come across a trend that seems to be more common all the time. It is what I call the 'bare minimum' types who other people often just put up with. Unbeknownst to even themselves, these are the people who 'get by' in their job or in their life by doing 'just barely enough' to be acceptable. They set the bar very low and do not improve much over time and yet they seem harmless and often are very good socially. They are so good at being liked that people overlook their poor effort.

I suppose passive-aggressive is another term..like whenever my husband did laundry, he always managed to damage something of mine. Finally, he is totally "taken off" laundry duty...since I cannot bear to have another $80 delicate item ruined by his lack of attention. Is it intentional? Does the procrastinator who finally helps out secretly 'want out' of the job and therefore does either the bare minimum or worse? Let's take a poll here...just for fun. For I personally find this to be one of the biggest turn offs.