The Best Quotes about God and Religion

Any fool can count the seeds in an apple. Only God can count all the apples in one seed. ~Robert H. Schuller

Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He's going to be up all night anyway. ~Mary C. Crowley

God loves each of us as if there were only one of us. ~St. Augustine

God understands our prayers even when we can't find the words to say them. ~Author Unknown

What we are is God's gift to us. What we become is our gift to God. ~Eleanor Powell

A man with God is always in the majority. ~John Knox

Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, whatever be the attitude of the body, the soul is on its knees. ~Victor Hugo

You can tell the size of your God by looking at the size of your worry list. The longer your list, the smaller your God. ~Author Unknown

Maybe the atheist cannot find God for the same reason a thief cannot find a policeman. ~Author Unknown

If God had wanted to be a big secret, He would not have created babbling brooks and whispering pines. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com

A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell. ~C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

The soul can split the sky in two and let the face of God shine through. ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins. ~Mark Twain

But I always think that the best way to know God is to love many things. ~Vincent van Gogh, Dear Theo: An Autobiography of Vincent van Gogh, 1937

No matter how much I prove and prod,
I cannot quite believe in God;
But oh, I hope to God that He
Unswervingly believes in me.
~E.Y. Harburg, attributed

People see God every day, they just don't recognize him. ~Pearl Bailey

How tired God must be of guilt and loneliness, for that is all we ever bring to Him. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame. ~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa

In many areas of understanding, none so much as in our understanding of God, we bump up against a simplicity so profound that we must assign complexities to it to comprehend it at all. It is mindful of how we paste decals to a sliding glass door to keep from bumping our nose against it. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com

I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits, and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds. ~Quentin Crisp

Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God. ~Diana Robinson

Weave in faith and God will find the thread. ~Author Unknown

They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse. ~Emily Dickinson

Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. ~Garth Brooks

God is a sort of burglar. As a young man you knock him down; as an old man you try to conciliate him, because he may knock you down. ~H. Beerbohm-Tree

Chance is perhaps the pseudonym of God when he did not want to sign. ~Anatole France, Le jardin d'Epicure

How idle it is to call certain things God-sends! as if there was anything else in the world. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

God is not the name of God, but an opinion about Him. ~Pope Xystus I, The Ring

God's promises are like the stars; the darker the night the brighter they shine. ~David Nicholas

In nature we see where God has been. In our fellow man, we see where He is still at work. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com

"What do you think of God," the teacher asked. After a pause, the young pupil replied, "He's not a think, he's a feel." ~Paul Frost

Remember this. When people choose to withdraw far from a fire, the fire continues to give warmth, but they grow cold. When people choose to withdraw far from light, the light continues to be bright in itself but they are in darkness. This is also the case when people withdraw from God. ~Augustine

Are you wrinkled with burden? Come to God for a faith lift. ~Author Unknown

There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "All right, then, have it your way." ~C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters, 1943

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God. Really. ~Lenny Bruce, "Religions Inc.," in The Essential Lenny Bruce, ed. John Cohen, 1967

Were there no God, we would be in this glorious world with grateful hearts and no one to thank. ~Christina Rossetti

Life is God's novel. Let him write it. ~Isaac Bashevis Singer

You are not obliged to put on evening clothes to meet God. ~Austin O'Malley

When you knock, ask to see God - none of the servants. ~Henry David Thoreau

Your mind works very simply: you are either trying to find out what are God's laws in order to follow them; or you are trying to outsmart Him. ~Martin H. Fischer

Those who believe that they believe in God, but without passion in their hearts, without anguish in mind, without uncertainty, without doubt, without an element of despair even in their consolation, believe in the God idea, not God himself. ~Miguel de Unamuno

Most people wish to serve God - but only in an advisory capacity. ~Author Unknown

The self-appointed spokesmen for God incline to shout; He, Himself, speaks only in whispers. ~Martin H. Fischer

For light I go directly to the Source of light, not to any of the reflections. ~Peace Pilgrim

Some people talk about finding God - as if He could get lost. ~Author Unknown

For, after all, put it as we may to ourselves, we are all of us from birth to death guests at a table which we did not spread. The sun, the earth, love, friends, our very breath are parts of the banquet.... Shall we think of the day as a chance to come nearer to our Host, and to find out something of Him who has fed us so long? ~Rebecca Harding Davis

I believe in God; I just don't trust anyone who works for him. ~Author Unknown

I cannot imagine how the clockwork of the universe can exist without a clockmaker. ~Voltaire

All that I have seen teaches me to trust God for all I have not seen. ~Author Unknown

He who kneels before God can stand before anyone. ~Author Unknown

Peace on the outside comes from knowing God on the inside. ~Author Unknown

God often visits us, but most of the time we are not at home. ~Joseph Roux, Meditations of a Parish Priest, 1886

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex? ~Art Hoppe

If God asks that you bend, bend and do not complain. He is making you more flexible, and for this be thankful. ~Terri Guillemets

When we lose God, it is not God who is lost. ~Author Unknown

Life is a tapestry: We are the warp; angels, the weft; God, the weaver. Only the Weaver sees the whole design. ~Quoted in The Angels' Little Instruction Book by Eileen Elias Freeman, 1994

I had a thousand questions to ask God; but when I met him they all fled and didn't seem to matter. ~Christopher Morley, Inward Ho!, 1923

Don't question God, for He may reply: "If you're so anxious for answers, come up here." ~Author Unknown

I would rather walk with God in the dark than go alone in the light. ~Mary Gardiner Brainard

Man is born broken. He lives by mending. The grace of God is glue. ~Eugene O'Neill, The Great God Brown, 1926

Peace is not the absence of affliction, but the presence of God. ~Author Unknown

If you are not as close to God as you used to be, who moved? ~Author Unknown

I have never understood why it should be considered derogatory to the Creator to suppose that he has a sense of humour. ~William Ralph Inge

When we put our cares in His hands, He puts His peace in our hearts. ~Author Unknown

Exercise daily. Walk with the Lord! ~Author Unknown

I could not say I believe. I know! I have had the experience of being gripped by something that is stronger than myself, something that people call God. ~Carl Jung

I believe in the sun even if it isn't shining. I believe in love even when I am alone. I believe in God even when He is silent. ~Author Unknown

God can never be a definition. He is more than even the entirety of the dictionary. ~Terri Guillemets

Darkness cannot put out the Light. It can only make God brighter. ~Author Unknown

No God, no peace. Know God, know peace. ~Author Unknown

You ask: what is the meaning or purpose of life? I can only answer with another question: do you think we are wise enough to read God's mind? ~Freeman Dyson, quoted in The Meaning of Life, compiled by Hugh S. Moorhead

It is doubtless true that religion has been the world's psychiatrist throughout the centuries. ~Karl Menninger

All religions are the same: religion is basically guilt, with different holidays. ~Cathy Ladman

The church is the great lost and found department. ~Robert Short

God made so many different kinds of people. Why would he allow only one way to serve him? ~Martin Buber

All religions must be tolerated... for... every man must get to heaven his own way. ~Frederick the Great

I like the silence of a church, before the service begins better than any preaching. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. ~George Bernard Shaw

Philosophy is the love of wisdom: Christianity is the wisdom of love. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

Businesses may come and go, but religion will last forever, for in no other endeavor does the consumer blame himself for product failure. ~Harvard Lamphoon, "Doon" (paraphrase)

Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful. ~Seneca the Younger

My religious position: I think that God could do a lot better, and I'm willing to give Him the chance. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

The churches must learn humility as well as teach it. ~George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan

I considered atheism, but there weren't enough holidays. ~Author Unknown

A religion can no more afford to degrade its Devil than to degrade its God. ~Havelock Ellis

In church, sacred music would make believers of us all - but preachers can be counted on to restore the balance. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence. ~Doug McLeod

I judge a religion as being good or bad based on whether its adherents become better people as a result of practicing it. ~Joe Mullally

According to science, the universe began as a swirl of gas that, as it cooled, spun off the Ten Commandments. ~Robert Brault

But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most? ~Mark Twain

Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does. ~Ambrose Bierce

I believe in God; I just don't trust anyone who works for him. ~Author unknown, from a stand-up comedy routine on television

There are three religious truths: 1) Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah. 2) Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith. 3) Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters. ~Author Unknown

Not all religion is to be found in the church, any more than all knowledge is found in the classroom. ~Author Unknown

Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned. ~Author Unknown

Were the purportings of the Bible to be a revelation false, it would still be the truest book that was ever written. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

Religion is a fashionable substitute for Belief. ~Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891

In every country and every age, the priest had been hostile to Liberty. ~Thomas Jefferson

I didn't know I had a quarrel with him. ~Henry Thoreau in answer to the question, "Have you made your peace with God?"

In some awful, strange, paradoxical way, atheists tend to take religion more seriously than the practitioners. ~Jonathon Miller

It does me no injury for my neighbor to say there are twenty gods or no God. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg. ~Thomas Jefferson

There were honest people long before there were Christians and there are, God be praised, still honest people where there are no Christians. It could therefore easily be possible that people are Christians because true Christianity corresponds to what they would have been even if Christianity did not exist. ~G.C. Lichtenberg

I refuse to be labeled immoral merely because I am godless. ~Peter Walker

Scriptures: the sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based. ~Ambrose Bierce

There are ten church members by inheritance for every one by conviction. ~Author Unknown

A man without religion is like a horse without a bridle. ~Latin Proverb

The question before the human race is, whether the God of nature shall govern the world by his own laws, or whether priests and kings shall rule it by fictitious miracles? ~John Adams, letter to Thomas Jefferson, 20 June 1815

Man is certainly stark mad; he cannot make a worm, and yet he will be making gods by dozens. ~Michel de Montaigne, translated

How many observe Christ's birthday! How few his precepts!
O! 'tis easier to keep holidays than commandments.
~Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanack, 1757

Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. ~C.C. Colton

A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes. ~James Feibleman, Understanding Philosophy, 1973

I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in human beings. Like Confucius of old, I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven and the angels. ~Pearl S. Buck

An Inuit hunter asked the local missionary priest: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" "No," said the priest, "not if you did not know." "Then why," asked the Inuit earnestly, "did you tell me?" ~Annie Dillard, Pilgrim at Tinker Creek

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't. ~George Bernard

It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry. ~H.L. Mencken

Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it. ~George Bernard Shaw

Sunday school: a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents. ~H.L. Mencken

Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed the serpent and the serpent didn't have a leg to stand on. ~Author Unknown

The wages of sin are death, but after they take the taxes out, it's more like a tired feeling, really. ~Paula Poundstone

To all things clergic
I am allergic
~Alexander Woolcott, attributed

What has been the effect of religious coercion? To make half the world fools, and the other half hypocrites. ~Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, 1785

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand. ~Mark Twain

In religion and politics, people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination. ~Mark Twain

If I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their lives and not the pattern of their words. I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul. ~Isaac Asimov, I. Asimov: A Memoir

Religion has not civilized man, man has civilized religion. ~Robert Green Ingersoll

God - but a word invoked to explain the world. ~Prat de Lamartine

How can the Church be received as a trustworthy guide in the invisible, which falls into so many errors in the visible? ~John W. Draper

To listen to some devout people, one would imagine that God never laughs. ~Ghose Aurobindo

Organized Christianity has probably done more to retard the ideals that were its founders' than any other agency in the world. ~Richard Le Gallienne

Christianity is not a religion; it's an industry. ~Author Unknown

I think I'll believe in Gosh instead of God. If you don't believe in Gosh too, you'll be darned to heck. ~Author Unknown

An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support. ~John Buchan

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car. ~Author Unknown

A Christian is a man who feels
Repentance on a Sunday
For what he did on Saturday
And is going to do on Monday.
~Thomas Russell Ybarra, The Christian

A great deal of what passes for current Christianity consists in denouncing other people's vices and faults. ~Henry H. Williams

The point is, could God pass an examination in Theology? ~Malcolm Muggeridge

To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals. ~Don Schrader

I like to browse in occult bookshops if for no other reason than to refresh my commitment to science. ~Heinz Pagels, The Dreams of Reason

If God doesn't like the way I live, let him tell me, not you. ~Author Unknown

Those people who tell me that I'm going to hell while they are going to heaven somehow make me very glad that we're going to separate destinations. ~Martin Terman

The myths about Hades and the gods, though they are pure invention, help to make men virtuous. ~Diodorus Siculus, c. 20 BC

Christianity tells people to repent and promises them forgiveness. It therefore has nothing (as far as I know) to say to people who do not know they have done anything to repent of and who do not feel that they need forgiveness. ~C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

One cannot erect, on the basis of a motive that exists only for a very few, an obligation that shall apply to everyone. ~Sigmund Freud, The Future of an Illusion

Most men would kill the truth if truth would kill their religion. ~Lemuel K. Washburn, Is The Bible Worth Reading And Other Essays

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said 'Stop! don't do it!' 'Why shouldn't I?' he said. I said, 'Well, there's so much to live for!' He said, 'Like what?' I said, 'Well...are you religious or atheist?' He said, 'Religious.' I said, 'Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?' He said, 'Christian.' I said, 'Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?' He said, 'Protestant.' I said, 'Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?' He said, 'Baptist!' I said, 'Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist church of god or Baptist church of the lord?' He said, 'Baptist church of god!' I said, 'Me too! Are you original Baptist church of god, or are you reformed Baptist church of god?' He said, 'Reformed Baptist church of god!' I said, 'Me too! Are you reformed Baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed Baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?' He said, 'Reformed Baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!' I said, 'Die, heretic scum,' and pushed him off. ~Emo Phillipe

It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it. ~G.K. Chesterton