Fun in shining armor
Renaissance Faires are the place to see jousting, sword fights, acrobats, armor and weapons and anything else one would see at a faire given during the late middle ages. Best of all, you are encouraged to dress up and become part of the show instead of just observing.
10 Ways to have Fun at the Renaissance Faire
When eating big turkey legs just isn't enough
Sure, you've gone to a few and cheered the jousters, shopped a bit, bought that perfect set of armored greaves - now what? Fear not, fairegoer, you can make your own fun, at least until the King's Guard kicks you out.
- Dress in a Star Trek uniform. Keep making loud 'log entries' into your cell phone about your 'away mission' on a primative planet. Refuse to explain any equipment you have, citing the 'prime directive'.
- Dress as a Crusader Knight. When anyone mentions the Crusades in any context, be historically accurate and enthusiastically describe the orgy of rape, murder, and plunder that occurred during the Seige of Jerusalem in 1099 as if you were a participant. Remember to use phrases like "...gutters ran red with muslim blood..."
- Recruit some African-American friends to come with you. March them around in chains and loin cloths. Try to 'sell' them to other faire visitors.
- Have 3 appropriately-garbed friends be 'bandits' while another costumed friend plays 'victim'. Have the bandits rob the victim in full view of other visitors as violently as can be safely staged. Have 'dead' victim lie on ground in pool of fake blood. Victim should continue to lay motionless as long as possible.
- Approach any 'wench' wearing a dress that displays a lot of cleavage and using medieval renaissance-type language describe what you'd like to do to her in graphic detail. Wear armor.
- Carry a round shield with a yellow 'happy face' on it. The rest of your costume should be aggressively authentic.
- Dress as a 'leper' in tattered clothing and leper sign around the neck. Walk around the faire screaming "unclean" over and over.
- Absurdly large codpiece, worn with very tight tights.
- Dress in ninja costume. Pretend to only speak Japanese.
- Get female to play bound 'witch' while an angry mob of friends loudly advocates her burning/hanging. While nooses can be prominently displayed, lit torches are optional.
A Rant
Draining the changepurse
One negative feature of most Renaissance Faires is the costs involved. OK, I know they have to feed the horses and pay the actors, but $25 - $35 per person? Not only that, but in some faires, the food is paid for by tickets, not cash, and the food prices are calculated to leave you with a few spare tickets at the end of the day. Couple this with actors who pass the floppy medieval hat at the end of performances, and cash is being steadily drained from ye olde bank, and that's before you've shopped for anything. A family of four can easily part with $100 or more by the end of the day. No discounts for costumes, either, which I've never understood. Don't they want visitors adding medieval color to the faire? Some costumes are fairly elaborate, and are indistinguishable from those of the actors. I know a faire of any type is the chance to part fools from their money, but they could at least leave me enough for gas.
Links for Weapons and Equipment
Armor Makes the Man
These are places that I've gone before and gotten quality stuff.
- Medieval Weapons, Swords, Body Armor, Medieval Clothing, Renaissance Clothing
- Medieval weapons, medieval clothing, renasissance clothing, costumes, weapons, swords, body armor from Museum Replicas.
They sell really good stuff, not tinfoil crap from the costume store. The clothing, armor, and weapons actually have heft and a feeling of protection, and you can imagine a soldier from that era actually wanting to wear it. - Welcome to Starfire Swords, Ltd. Website!
- Starfire Swords, Ltd. create swords, daggers, axes, pole-arms, and leather accessories for theatrical use, costume, display, and staged-combat.
Don't let the "theatrical and costume" use fool you. These are beautiful and authentic weapons, the only concession to modern times is that they are not produced with sharp edges. Definitely NOT the aluminum cheap crap that floods the market, these weapons are actually made by a master swordsmith (I know - I once visited the facility with some friends on a trip through northern New England, and they gave us a very nice tour despite the fact that we stopped on a whim and were entirely unexpected). - King Richard's Faire
- King Richard's Faire is a vivid recreation of a 16th century English marketplace at festival time. Actors, dancers, puppeteers, minsterels, mimes, jugglers, magicians and musicians perform each weekend for the favor of his Royal Highness King Richard and his Queen Katherine.
A pretty good faire, except for one of my main complaints (see rant above). I always liked the little "town" with shops, some complete with sleeping or storage space above. Sadly, King Richard's has declined somewhat from when I first started going, with some of the actors (including my favorite act, Smee and Blogg, the Dancing Executioners) leaving the production for other faires, but they still have quite a cast and they've been pretty imaginative in changing the "storyline" every year. - Connecticut Renaissance Faire - Southern New England's Renaissance Festival
- Now is your chance to see why thousands of families from around New England have made us their family tradition as we transport you back in time. See a 400-year-old agricultural festival as it would have been back in the Renaissance complete with jousting knights, fire eaters, sword swallowers, and over 60 hours of live entertainment daily. There is so much to see and do.
This faire is at least more reasonably priced and they actually have some discounts. They seem to be more skittish about weapons (my sword had to be plastic ziptied) but they put on a good show and seem to feature quite a few "refugees" from King Richard's (Smee and Blogg, to my surprise). Goes on at almost the same time as KRF, so you can compare the two if you live or travel to the Northeast in the late summer / early fall.
by 3 people |

![Knights and Armor [VHS]](http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51K134RZ1RL._SL75_.jpg)



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