Resolve Stress

Let's discuss this.

Think about your answer to the question we just asked. What is the biggest source of stress in your life?

Got your answer?

Great! Now here's the next question.

Using the perspective you just took to identify the source of your stress, is it outside you or inside you?

Outside or inside? Got your answer?

Great! Here's the thing. You can look it this question of stress either way. Honest. It's a perspective thing. One answer isn't right and the other wrong. If you see your stress as coming from outside you, that's ok. If you see it as coming from inside, that's ok, too.

But keep this in mind. You have little ability to influence things that originate outside you. On the other hand, things that arise from the inside can often be influenced by your own desire, intent and action. Through a mystical process called ... healthy living. You might even inadvertently resolve that stress.

Viewing your stress as something that comes from the inside is no more right than seeing it as sourced from the outside. However I'm going to be bold enough to assert that it is more personally empowering.

This isn't rocket science. It may even sound familiar. But among the folks I talk with each day, a definite majority see their stress as outwardly sourced.

There's a good reason.

The predominant socially acceptable view of stress in our culture says that you are a victim of your circumstances and there's not a darned thing you can do about it except to manage how you react to the oppression. (Are you starting to get the sense I don't support this view?)

Consider the conventional tools we have in place for stress management...

1. Become a better eavesdropper. One way to increase awareness is to develop the habit of eavesdropping on yourself. You know what I mean don't you? Tune in to the constant narration going on in the back of your head.



2. Ask a better question. Once you get clear on what's going on, you'll probably be inspired to do something about it. But what? And how? It's easy. Just think of a question that, if answered, would provide the resolution you need. Then watch and wait for the answer to show up.



3. Write it down.Sometimes your mind is a jumble of ideas, worries, fears, and problems. It can be hard to sort out. A simple notebook and a pen can become your allies. Set aside at least a half an hour. Sit down someplace quiet. Write. Repeat as necessary until things come into order.



4. Cultivate receptivity. Sometimes, the challenge is simply to receive what's offered. Peace over misplaced pride.

Excerpted from Stress Solved! 42 Tips to Wake Up Your Intuition, Inspire Creative Solutions, and Pull the Plug on Stress by Elizabeth Eckert

If you have a car, you've probably had a flat tire. If you don't personally own a car, just play along.

Let's say your trusty steed is parked out in the driveway, awaiting your morning commute to work. You walk out and notice that one of the front tires is low. Not flat. Just unmistakably low.

As luck would have it, you've got an important meeting today and time is of the essence. Yikes!

So what do you do?

You stop by the corner service startion and pump up the tire enough to get by until you can visit the tire shop (or stop by Uncle Louie's 24/7 garage). I think most of us would.

It's what happens next that separates the proverbial men from the boys in our little example. Do you go right out on your lunch break (or perhaps at the end of your workday) and take care of the tire?

Or do you nurse it along for weeks, checking, adding, wondering... Always keeping in the back of your mind that the whole thing could blow at any moment, leaving you stranded on the side of the highway with no one but the OnStar operator for company and support.

If you picked "a," then I'd guess you aren't bothered too much by the stressors in your life. You handle things as they come up and you're done with them. Your default is to resolve stress.

If you picked "b," though, I'd guess you experience life as highly stressful. All that checking, monitoring and wondering how much you'll be able to get away with exerts an enormous drain on your personal energy -- the same kind of drain that stress exerts on your health.

One caveat: All stress is not created equal, as you well know. You might be really great at keeping up your car and not so great at relationships, or finances, or health and wellness. You're human. So keep your eyes pealed ... your nose to the ground ... your awareness tuned to that little voice in the back of your head.

Aim to become an expert detective ... of your own unmanaged stress.

Here's the take-away. When you hear that little voice in the back of your head start to whine about how stressed out you are, create a new thought. Instead of trying to gain sympathy for your misfortune or numb yourself out, just ask a better question.

* Where's that stress really coming from?

* What influence can I bring to the table to begin resolving it?

Resolve stress. Hmmm.

Chances are that your unmanaged stress won't result in all these problems -- thank goodness! But I'm guessing you'd rather not sign up for any of them.

Health Challenges from Unmanaged Stress

* Hopelessness / Depression
* Inefficient Immune System
* Cancer
* Heart Disease
* Muscular & Skeletal System Pain
* Accidents & Violent Crime
* Premature Aging
* Obesity

Lifestyle Challenges from Unmanaged Stress

* Early death
* Physical disability
* Financial loss from medical bills
* Financial loss from inability to work, or to be effective at work
* Guilt about mis-managing your life
* Guilt about leaving loved ones behind
* Disappointment at being unable to fulfill your dreams
* Physical pain
* Looking older than your chronological age
* Unable to keep up recreational activities
* Difficulty breathing, catching your breath
* Loss of mental alertness
* Inability to solve problems effectively in other areas of life
* Self-conscious about personal appearance
* Compromised personal relationships

Yuck! Nobody wants all that!

Wouldn't it just be easier to resolve your stress and be done with it? Probably.