Responsible Living -- Right and Wrong

If you feel bad when others judge you, who are you trying to please?

Let's face it...there are billions of people in the world, and at least one of them is going to think what you do is absolutely wrong. Maybe two.

So you're guaranteed right from the start that you cannot please everyone. So who are you trying to please?

I think you should focus on pleasing yourself. You must feel that what you do is right, and have a solidly defined standard for right and wrong.

This bit isn't usually popular.

Right and wrong are not absolutes, but are judged within your own framework of values and beliefs. What is right to you may be wrong to another.

And you're both right, for your own values.

So here it is...Right actions support your values, Wrong actions conflict with your values.

The problems start when we try to apply our values to someone else's actions. It simply doesn't work. Their action may very well have been wrong for our values, but that doesn't make it wrong for theirs.

If we want to escape from the cycle of being judged by others, we need to start by not judging them.

This isn't a license to behave however you want, claiming that it's right because you wanted to do it.

This lens assumes that you've gone through the process of defining your highest values, and are working toward personal and spiritual growth. If you haven't, then you don't really have a foundation on which to decide right and wrong for your own actions.

If you're serious about the process, your values become more respectful and loving as you go through it, and your actions do, too.