Sure-Fire Signs of a Committed Relationship

It is interesting watching people fall in love. So often it's one sided, more like a crush than a relationship. One person runs after another person who isn't really interested at all.

What's the point? It can't work.

It looks more like a cycle of abuse than a relationship.

So, what if you are more selective? What if you are ready for something better? There are other people out there who are ready, too, people who are ready to give as well as take, who know about loving and can have a real committed relationship.

So quit getting heart broken and be more demanding. It's partly about respecting yourself.

Part of that is recognizing who can never give you what you want.

Clearly there are people who have so many problems they are not good risks, like people who are into drugs (whether prescription or illegal) or people who are physically and emotionally abusive. The odds of either problem going away are slim to none and not a good bet.

People who have drug problems rarely get better and they are inherently untrustworthy. They'll steal from their mother for their next fix.

People who are physically abusive feel weak inside and want to pass that victimization to someone else. It's based in weakness and fear, not power. Personalities that are that damaged usually don't recover, either.

But then how, after you eliminate those pitiful losers, can you tell if someone is truly ready for a real, committed relationship? You may be ignoring a good relationship for one that is very risky and dangerous to your heart, your body, and even your life.

Here are 7 ways to help you evaluate whether someone is worth the risks to your heart, your dreams and your body.

1. People who love you are not mean to you. They don't deliberately disappoint, they don't talk badly to you or say you are fat even if you are. They are sweet to you. They take the trouble to be nice to you because they care about how you feel.
2. The right person makes time for you no matter how busy their schedule. They make time for you because you matter to them. They actually like to be with you. They also care about your enjoyment.
3. The right person for you shares your interests and goals. We knew a man who had no family left desperately wanted family ties. He made a good marriage with an infertile woman. They chose to adopt children and are happy. Every couple is different. Maybe you have other interests that are more in the way of hobbies or a shared business. The possibilities are endless.
4. You need to share similar values. This can be difficult and maybe the best reason to take it slowly in relationships. In this context what they do matters more than what they say. If they aren't for real their actions will speak the truth. Pay attention. The way they treat you and other people will tell the story they try to hide from the world.
5. Do you find that other person attractive? This can be tricky. I have found some pretty unattractive people attractive because they had great personalities. But attraction is important to long term relationships. If you marry someone because you think they will make a good provider or a great mother for your children, sex can get to feel like an awful chore. Attraction does matter for the long haul. Need help with attracting that special man? Click Here
6. Someone cares for you and especially you will do things just to make you happy and comfortable. It's so obvious we are amazed we have to say it. Some one who loves you does loving things for you. My guy runs me a bubble bath every evening and loads the dishwasher after dinner. Does it make me feel loved? YES!
7. Someone who loves you respects you and your needs and your opinions. They don't blow you off when you say things. They don't patronize you or tell you you're too dumb or naïve to know what you want or need. They care about what you want and need and how you feel about everything.

A real loving relationship is more like a partnership than a relationship where one person is the dictator and the other is the peon. It's a partnership of mutual support and mutual pleasure and mutual respect. That's a committed relationship. Demand it all!