There are no spare parts. It's all good ground, fried or covered in ketchup.
It's downright sinful to waste in the South. No sir-ee.
You don't throw out perfectly good food stuff. Someone in China might be starving. Of course, it may very well be that kids in China hear the same story. "Clean that plate. Kids in the South may be starving." And, we are all probably digging from both directions - just to see if we can tunnel through.
I offered, but only once, to send my dinner to China. Momma was none too happy about that. It ranked right up with my sister saying, "Good bread. Good meat. Good Lord. Let's eat," for blessing. Seems she read that at the state line knick-knack shop on a napkin holder. That's what she gets for listening to those Huked on Fonix records. We both got a'talking to and newfound respect for other nations and the Lord. We also learned to clean our plates or bribe our brothers to eat the peas and liver.
Growing up, we had darn good grub. Now, it wasn't always uptown. A big, old snapping turtle crawled up our driveway one day. Momma did the natural thing. She cooked it for dinner. And, yes, it does taste sort of like chicken.
These days, folks have suddenly decided it's cool to eat Southern. I was at a fancy restaurant in Dallas, and they served a Wilted Salad. Grandma's been tossing the lettuce in the bacon grease for years, but she doesn't charge $5.95 for a bowl of that stuff. The grease is left over from breakfast. The lettuce is growing in the patch out back.
If you been having a hankering for some real Southern Cooking, then you've come to the right place. From pork rinds to Jell-O salads and pickled eggs, that's what I'm talkin' 'bout.
A Little Bit Southern - Or "Pickled Pigs Feet" are Too Much for Me!
Like a little bit pregnant - but OK for starters.
Here's a couple of few good southern dishes that usually don't offend anyone. If they do, sue me. Judge Judy is looking for some interestin' characters.
Beer Butt Chicken - This sounds like a joke recipe, but it turns out some darn tasty yard bird.
Grilled Beer Burgers - You can use some uptown beer, but good old Busch works just fine too.
Old Fashioned Southern Cornbread - Check out that ring of butter in the picture. Yum buddy. That's some killer cornbread.
Carolina Crab Cakes - If you've only had restaurant crab cakes, you are missing out. These puppies are easy to make. What are you waiting for?
Southern Pan Fried Potatoes - You ain't Southern if ya ain't fried no tators in a skillet.
Best Ever Southern Potato Salad - There's a million recipes for tater salad. This here's the best I know of.
Southern Fried Dill Pickles - Proof we fry any old thing in the South.
My cousin made an "A" on this poem - his only work of literary genius.
If you found he done copied it, tell me. I'll beat him up and cite the real souce.
If you ain't heard of that.
You ain't from 'round here.
I promised Road Kill. I deliver. How to cook a possum.
This ain't the best eatin' but it'll do.
I've promised road kill, so I figured I better ought to deliver.
First things first. Don't scrap a possum up off the road. I won't tell you what happens to meat when it sits, but it ain't pretty. You're gonna have to go out and bag a fresh possum or o'possum if you want to get technical about it.
Soak that possum for 10 hours in salt water to get rid of some of the gamey taste.
Gut that sucker and dip it in boiling water and scrap clean like you would a pig. That basically means that you don't skin the thing, but you do clean it out.
There are some red glands - one under each foreleg and another at the bottom of the rib cage. Remove those things. Also cut off the head, feet and tail. Do this when you're gutin' and before you're dippin'.
Bake for around 2 hours in a covered roaster at 400 degrees. About halfway through, dump off some of that fat. You can baste with some of it and save some to make pan gravy.
That's 'bout the best you can do with possum. Kind of greasy and fatty. But, I've had worse things.
If you want to learn more about opossums from a Southerner with a good sense of humor, check out.
Clay's Corner - Opossum Capital of the World
They really ain't jokin' 'bout eatin' Road Kill in West Virginia.
The WV Senate passed the Road Kill (hit 'em and eat 'em) bill in 1998.
And, if you hit a person, you can't eat him or her. Good thing that.
I'm still looking for the actual Senate bill. Could have been canned later.
Here's a feature story on it. The story also includes a Road Kill Cook Off competition and a recipe.
I don't know. There's just something about eatin' something I smashed on the road that don't set well.
I'm scared to get a cast iron pot or pan.
Heard they're hard to season.
There's really nothin' to to.
Get your cast iron pan. It might be a new one, or it could be one you let get nasty (rusty, stuck on food - all manner of other sins which can be corrected).
Wash the pan if it's new. Use a scratch pad to get the gross stuff off if you're trying to revive a messed up one.
Rub the pan all over with a hard fat or vegetable product. In other words, get the can of Crisco out and rub it all over the pan.
Use an old rag for this. It's darn messy to rub Crisco on anything.
Don't be fooled into putting cooking oil on your cast iron. It runs. It's sticky. I don't care if the manual tells you to use that stuff. Don't do it. Just askin' for trouble.
Bake the cast iron pan for an hour or two at 200 to 250 F. Just set a timer and go about your business.
That's it.
If the pan starts sticking or if you get rust and so on, just do the above again.
Eventually you'll have a pan that will survive anything, and it will be your favorite pan in the whole house.
If ya ain't got no cast iron, ya ain't cookin' southern.
Hate to break it to ya.
Lodge Logic 12-Inch Pre-Seasoned Skillet
Amazon Price: $16.97 (as of 07/26/2008)
Lodge Cast Iron Scrubber Brush
Amazon Price: $4.99 (as of 07/26/2008)
What Can I Cook in A Cast Iron Skillet?
Well, you can cook anything in there that you'd cook in any skillet
If you've got a new cast iron skillet, it's a good idea to deep fry. You can do fish or home cut French fries. Just fill the pan about half full of oil and heat to medium high (350 to 375 degrees). This helps break in the cast iron pan - all that grease.Otherwise you can cook in your cast iron skillet just like you would any other skillet.
If you need some inspiration, here are a few of my favorite southern fried recipes.
Pan Fried Potatoes - This here's our answer to fast food. Toss them tators in. They fry up fast and tasty.
Fresh Fried Skillet Corn - Neighbor give ya some corn from his garden? Try out this tasty fried corn recipe.
Cast Iron Skillet Fried Apples - This here can be a side dish or dessert - or both. Better get to cuttin' them apples.
Fried Cornmeal Mush - If ya ain't heard of this, just ask someone old. Good stuff. Just don't see it as often these days.
If you're just cooking on the stove with that old cast iron skillet, then it's time to see the light and the fire. You can cast iron cook right on the barbecue grill. No kidding. Don't heat up the kitchen. Haul that skillet out and throw it on the grill.
Southern Soup Beans
They're good for your heart. Or my Poppaw told me so.
Put the beans in a pot the night before you go to bed. Cover them good with water. They soak up the water and rehydrate.
Next morning, pour off the water.
Add clean water. Plenty of water.
Put a ham bone, ham hocks or a couple of slices of bacon (if you don't have road kill parts) in the pot.
Let simmer at a low temperature until the meat (if you use a ham bone) starts to fall off and the beans are tender. This takes an hour or two.
These are basic beans. You can add more salt and pepper or hot sauce (yum) shortly before they're done cooking.
The soup is pretty thin the first day. They thicken up the second day. If you really love thick beans, take a cup of beans out. Run them through the blender. Put those in. It thickens up.
Now for a little culture. A bean poem for all generations.
Can't find who wrote it. Let me know if you do.
They make you strong and make you fart.
A fart is a bubble of compressed air,
Which gives the body ease.
It warms the bed on a frosty night,
And suffocates the fleas!
If'n ya need a cookbook - well boy howdy - they got some out there.
Ain't many real good southern ones though.
The Black Family Reunion Cookbook: Recipes and Food Memories
This is one of my favorite all-time recipe books. I buy copies for my relations for holidays. This one might be thought of as Soul Food cooking, but mountain cooking and soul cooking are pretty darn similar.
Amazon Price: $10.20 (as of 07/26/2008)
Jim Graham's Farm Family Cookbook for City Folk
Big Jim was my friend, and I have his campaign mug to prove it. Had it printed right on the side, "Jim Graham is my friend." He was our state commissioner of agriculture for long as I could remember back. He got the home ec ladies across the state help him put this project together. He's gone now, but his recipe book lives on.
Amazon Price: $16.16 (as of 07/26/2008)
Granny's Beverly Hillbillies Cookbook
Don't laugh now. OK. You can watch the TV show and he-haw all ya want. This book has some good eats though, and it's an easy starter southern cookbook.
Amazon Price: (as of 07/26/2008)
More Mountain Spirits: The Continuing Chronicle of Moonshine Life and Corn Whiskey, Wines, Ciders & Beers in America's Appalachians
Want a little history and some tall tales with that second helping of mashed tators. You'll enjoy both reading and cooking from this book.
Amazon Price: $9.56 (as of 07/26/2008)
The Foxfire Book of Appalachian Cookery
Amazon Price: $19.95 (as of 07/26/2008)
Bacon Grease - Not So Good for Your Heart
But, boy that grease gives food that something extra!
Grandma's mashed potatoes always tasted better than mine, so I asked her to tell me her secret."Well, I just mash them and add a little milk and salt and pepper," said Grandma.
Hum. That's pretty much what I'd been doing.
"Oh, and I put in a dallop of bacon grease."
Ah. Ha. That was it.
Not so healthy. But, bacon grease sure gives some flavor to almost anything. Just add a tablespoon or so in green beans, squash, mashed potatoes.
Salad with bacon grease has actually come back in style apparently. I had some but called Wilted Lettuce at a fancy restaurant. It's just lettuce heated quick in a little bacon grease. Simple as that. Yummy too.
Fried Bologna Sandwiches
You Know You Want One
It's hard to get my boys excited about cold bologna sandwiches, but if I break out the skillet, they will go wild for this cheap stuff.
One tip I need to share is that you've got to put 3 to 4 slits on the edges of the bologna. Otherwise, you have little bologna cups (also known as bologna boobs). They shrink and cup up without the slits.
Other than that, it's super easy to make fried bologna sandwiches. Just toss the bologna in the skillet. Heat it until it's warm. Put it on white bread with mustard. Yum. That's a sandwich.
After fried bologna, cook up a Bisquick Chicken Pie. You will feel very Southern, and your kids will be most happy.
Road Kill Grill
Seriously - this is very funny. You've got to click and see it.
The Road Kill Grill
Candied cat carcass... savory squirrell souffle... possum pancakes... mmm! Stylish gourmet on a beer budget! For drive-by dining at its best, get The Road Kill Grill today!
Runtime: 4:48
8251 views
10 Comments:
You know ya got a hankering for something good and southern.
Post recipe requests or just stop by and shoot the bull.
If you shoot the bull, I'll be sure to cook up all the spare bull parts. NO BULL!
| ElizabethJeanAllen
Living in the south I've eaten some strange things but I draw the line on possum. Posted June 20, 2008 |
|
dyllen
Welcome to the 'Soups - Great Food - Recipes and Chefs' Group Posted June 18, 2008 |
| GrillGirl
Funny you should mention the possom falling down. Two got in my Mom's house last week. They decided to play in her bedroom after she went to sleep. She got up, chased them down, captured them in a blanket and hauled them out. She was not too happy about that either. Posted June 07, 2008 |
|
johndilbeck
I almost never laugh out loud when I'm by myself reading a computer screen, but I really did it a couple of times while reading this. Great! Posted June 06, 2008 |
What's them other crazy southerners cooking up out there.
Makes ya wish ya was there huh?
This is pot luck. I don't cook it. I just watch it flash by.


