Spotting Odd in Life

Odd Jobs - Somebody's Gotta Do It! 

• Cabbie: You'd be a voyeur by virtue...simply because of who hopped in to catch a ride! True, there is not much to view if you are picking up mom and pop in Hoboken, just imagine the scuttlebutt in big city pick-ups...you could write a friggen' book or sell your info to "The Enquirer"! Not just any hack can apply!
  
  
• Competitive Eater: Can you say plop, plop, fizz, fizz ohh what a relief it is? This definitely is not for someone with a tender tummy! Hot diggetty dog!
  
  
• Corporate Bank Robber: Have you ever fantasized about robbing a bank? Short of landing your tush in Leavenworth this advocation may be your ticket to real freedom! 'Legally' steal information, then come back and explain how to prevent it! Gold doubloon's not included!
  
  
• Department Store Santa: If you're willing to enter into the realms of fantasy, have a bazillion kids sit on your lap (some with poopy diapers, most wailing, "Mamma!"), and meeting the occasional stressed-out parent then consider signing up for this 6-8 week gig! No fake beards allowed!
  
  
• ER Doctor: "I hate being startled! And being startled is all those people do, for twleve hours a day. Drug overdose! Shooting! Stabbing! Broken leg! Everything with this job is a big fat exclamation point, all the time, and I don't think my nerves could take it, even for one day. I'd be like, "Eight years of school...that's fine, I quit!" Only trauma-mamma's should apply!
  
  
• Fountain Pen Repair: What the heck? Kind of like an old wore pair of shoes and prior to our [drives me crazy] disposable world, being the proud owner of a pen meant something. Rara avis shout-out for this unique nibs repairer! Write, right, rite, huh?
  
  
• Gumologist: Jessie Kiefer explains, "Formulating gum requires the right balance of flavor, texture and sweeteners that can then be mass produced. We've come a long way since the Greeks chewed on resin from the bark of the mastic tree to sweeten their breath." Calling all 'gumshoes'!
  
  
• IMAX Screen Cleaner: Requirements: Team player, working knowledge of power tools, ability to de-screen gummi-bears, soda syrup, spit-wads without being grossed out, and appreciates being on stage but out of the lime-light. Lights, camera, action!
  
  
• Las Vegas Valet: Word on the street, this job can land you a triple digit income. Wow! Plant that smile on your face, perfect some witty one-liners, and get ready to do the hustle, baby! See ya in Vegas :)
  
  
• Lifeguard: Salt water, sharks, and stupid people, uhh are you still excited about applying? Go ahead... strut your stuff!
  
  
• Meth Lab Owner: Only start this business if you have no conscience, enjoy living in a paranoid state of mind, and consider yourself above the law! These pics reflect your proud ownership in this industry! Bad Boys, whatcha' gonna do?
  
  
• Prison Guard: Mmm! Now who in their right mind would actually walk into a prison everyday? Not me, guess somebody has to do it though...otherwise those damn prisoner's would run a muck! Press your uniform, shine them boots and keep the keys on your person at all times!
  
  
• Professional Whistler: This sure adds spin to the song "Whistle While You Work"! Proof that it takes all kind of folk to make the world go 'round! Pucker power!
  
  
• Roadkill Artist: How mundane, down-right smelly, and gross is this...splat, find, scoop, dry, frame? I resound YUCK! Little critters, run for your life!
  
  
• Trapeze Artist: This position is only for the buff, the daring, the extremist...acrophobics need not apply! Don't mess with the catcher's wife :)