Benefits of staying home with your children
Many children grow up in homes where one, or both, parents work. In many cases where single-parenting is concerned, the parent must work in order to meet on-going financial needs.
However, some parents are able to stay at home, whether through finding odd jobs on the Internet or working for an employer from home. Still others have decided to start up their own businesses. Regardless, there are benefits to being a stay-at-home parent and this lens will bring some of those benefits to your attention.
Table of Contents
- Taking life for granted
- Totally drained
- Time passes
- Parental leave
- Improved sibling relationships
- Hanging out at home
- Enjoying my family
- Growing in leaps and bounds
- Internal longings
- The debate continues: to stay home with the children or go to work???
- *******July 17, 2008*******
- August 12, 2008
- Your comments, please!
- Isle of Squid
Benefits of staying home with your children
Seeing your baby do things for the first time. It's such a rewarding experience which many working parents miss.
Being home to greet your children when they arrive home from school, drama rehearsal, a play date, and so on. Seeing their excitement and hearing the enthusiasm in their voices while emotions are still fresh can't be duplicated.
Having time to listen to, and spend time with, your children without continually watching the clock so you won't be late for work.
Going out for spontaneous outings when your children have the day off from school, as opposed to being stuck at work for most of the day.
Looking after your children when they are sick, as opposed to feeling guilty when having to work, knowing they are with a sitter. Regardless of how great a sitter is, parents always prefer to, personally, tend to their children when they are not feeling well.
Arranging play dates is a possibility. Your children get to know children of your friends and, when they get along well together, there is much potential for fun and laughter, as well as growth. In addition, you get to socialize with your friends.
Having meals at normal times is an added bonus. Your family doesn't need to wait until 7:00 p.m. to eat dinner because you can eat at 5:00 p.m. It gives everyone a chance to relax and unwind after dinner.
Schedules are set to benefit your family instead of your workplace. There's no such thing as turning your child down for a play date because you have to work. Your work is looking after your family and, as such, you do your best to keep your family members happy.
As long as children are not required to be in school, vacations can take place any time. Vacation time doesn't need to be granted from an outside employer. Your family is free to choose.
You get to know each other better as you spend more time together. You also appreciate each other more. Parents working outside of the home endure a lot of stress on any given day and, with the added responsibilities at home, family members often see each other at their worst moments. Staying home with your children yields lots of hugs and smiles as opposed to anxiety attacks.
Taking life for granted
Little need for childcare facilities
Stay-at-home parents raising children is something I have, somewhat, taken for granted over the years. I have three children and, with the first two, they were home primarily with their grandmother or their father, each of who worked part-time jobs, often during days of the week when I didn't have to work. Thus, when I was off, I was able to spend time with my daughters. There was little need for childcare facilities and it was something that was just a normal part of life for me.
However, my marriage dissolved through forces beyond my control which brought a single-parenting situation into my home. Gone were the days of being able to count on a spouse to look after my children but, thankfully, by that time, they were both attending school full-time.
Totally drained
When will it end?
Nonetheless, I continued to work. After all, with no financial support from my ex, someone had to feed and clothe the girls, pay utility bills, the mortgage, provide for other daily needs, and so on.
I wished with all my heart that I could have been home when the girls arrived home from school every day at 3:30 p.m. but it wasn't to be. In most cases, my employer wouldn't allow me to leave work until three to four hours later. By the time I arrived home, I was exhausted but I tried to put my best foot forward for the sake of my girls.
I knew in the few years that I had been single-parenting that I was exhausted; that my girls could have been better behaved in some areas. I knew my workload was too much for them to take but, at the same time, who was going to pay the bills and look after us if I quit my job? How would we ever go on the vacations they had come to enjoy should everything change overnight?
My employer didn't see any reason why I should be granted special benefits, despite being the only single parent amongst our management team, so I was stuck.
Time passes
Life changes
Advance the calendar a few years. I started seeing another guy. The more time we spent together with the girls, the more my girls adored him, even more than they had their father. We've remained together and have welcomed a new addition to the family, a son.
Parental leave
Present blessings - future dread
For the time being, I am on parental leave but, in the near future, I will have to return to the work force full-time, working hours equal to, or beyond, what was required of me at the time I went on maternity leave. My son's dad works full-time, as well, and my parents have relocated.
For the first time, I'm struggling with the issue of not having a parent staying home to look after one of my children while the other works, and it is a difficult situation for me to deal with.
Improved sibling relationships
appreciation at last
I've noticed a major change in my daughters since I've been staying home with them these past several months. They are calmer and easier to get along with. Their speaking tones are different. They are still loud when they get excited but, generally, they aren't trying to outdo each other in demanding my attention because they know they have it.
Hanging out at home
Feeling at peace with the world
Also, my oldest daughter who was trying to buck the rules and get away with doing her own thing isn't the same person anymore. She's mellowed out and we laugh a lot and even write together, at times. We watch movies, hang out, and enjoy being with each other, and she's great at helping out with her little brother.
Enjoying my family
Enjoying time to relax
My youngest daughter is more comfortable, as well. She spends time with her friends but spends time at home, enjoying hanging out with the family. However, she has a tendency to monopolize the family channels on television, to be sure, unless she decides reading or a computer game is more exciting.
Growing in leaps and bounds
Enjoying lots of attention
As for our little guy, he's a happy, bouncing baby boy who can't do things fast enough to please himself. He is only 9 ½ months old and is beginning to talk already, in two word sentences, sometimes. He is thriving being surrounded by a loving family and gives much love in return.
Internal longings
If wishes paid money
Knowing first-hand how it is to be a stay-at-home mom and seeing the wonderful results I've witnessed in my daughters, especially the oldest one, I dread for the day to come when I must report to work. Right now, I would rather quit and never take a vacation again, if it meant I could raise my children and continue to see them thrive. However, at this point, it isn't possible.
Children, regardless of their ages, need someone they can depend upon to be available for them at any time of the day, or night. They need boundaries which are enforced but, at the same time, they need to learn to spread their wings in a safe environment.
What safer environment does a child have than one in which a parent truly loves and nurtures them?
The debate continues: to stay home with the children or go to work???
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*******July 17, 2008*******
My time of being a stay-at-home Mom has come to an unfortunate end. As I write, I've been back at work and will finish my first week tomorrow.
I look forward to the week-end so I can hang out with my family again - when I won't feel as tired as I have been throughout this past week.
While it's nice to make contact with people more than I have over the past year, my family and I are going through an adjustment period - but I'm happy to report that, thus far, things are going well.
August 12, 2008
I've been back at work for just over four weeks now and my family has, for the most part, adjusted.
My youngest daughter has gone back to school (grade 4) while my oldest daughter - who will be starting grade 9 in less than two weeks - is babysitting Miles, who will turn 1 in a couple of weeks.
The real test is just around the corner - when Kelsey has to attend school and Miles is left with a sitter. Why do I feel the worst is yet to come, or will everything work out better than I imagine?
Your comments, please!
lisakleinweber wrote...
I homeschool / unschool my son, made possible because I have an internet marketing business so I don't have to work - and yes, it's awesome.
Posted March 12, 2009
Kelsey-Budden-16 wrote...
Parents staying home with you can be annoying but fun. Annoying when they are mad, but awesome when they wanna chill and watch a movie or something. :P
Posted November 24, 2008
ParentCoachGTD wrote...
You can never get that time back that is missed. Staying home with kids can be priceless. I was lucky to be home with my daughter for her first three years during the day, and went to grad school at night. Wouldn't trade i.t
Posted September 17, 2008
TwoBrightHeads wrote...
Nice Lens. I am a stay at home dad. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
big bright head
Posted August 04, 2008
LauraMarie wrote...
I havent got any kids, but can remember my mum stying at home with me and my brother.
Posted June 02, 2008
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First and foremost, I have three wonderful children, two daughters and a son, and they are the main reasons I get up in the morning - literally, in th... (more)
