Steps To Win Back Her Heart
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Win Back Her Heart
First and foremost, you must take time apart. There is no way around this step and it is perhaps the most important step of all. It won't feel good but you both need time on your own. Taking time to reflect on what drove you apart and what you need to do to work towards getting back a girlfriend will serve you well. It's all about change. Change is something we humans usually have a hard time doing. Because you cannot change her; consider changing anything about you that you deem critical to the success of your relationship. For instance, you must have some ideas about the things you have done that were hurtful to her. Some of these changes may be extremely difficult. For example, if she hates that you smoke because she finds it disgusting, consider quitting. I know it is not that easy to do but in the long run it will be better for the both of you. Maybe you are disorganized and late for everything. Maybe she felt that you didn't often put her best interests first. Maybe you smothered her and were too possessive. Do you suffer from low self esteem? These are the kind of things you need to give thought to.
These changes will take time and effort so you should start working on them immediately after you identify them as potential problems. Let a period of one to two weeks at the very minimum pass before you make contact. She may contact you in that time. Keep things on the light side. Don't try to delve into any problems as that would probably take you back to square one. Having fun is the goal at this point. This is not the time to discuss problems. She will have to see for herself that you have changed. If you feel the "old" you coming back, bite your tongue before you let any discussions escalate to the same old thing. This new relationship should be all about a new start - not just to win back her heart but for good if you sincerely want this relationship to last. It may give her the incentive to change things about herself after she witnesses your changes.
More Steps To Win Back Her Heart
You Can Do This!
Once you have met or talked on the phone several times, the next step is to start building a solid foundation. Be lighthearted and have fun. Laugh often and be at ease. Show her that you have come a long way and that you are intent on being a different person. Avoid pressuring her into dating as that will come naturally when she is ready. Women love confident men with a healthy self esteem. They want to be able to count on their partners. Simple things work best as in taking walks or going on picnics. You plan the picnic. You have to be willing to work for this relationship not just to get her back, but rather to build a strong foundation so you can stay together. Staying together is a two way street. Hopefully she is capable of giving back working hard to becoming a long lasting couple. If you do not embrace change, then in time that will be apparent to her and she will feel that you played her. If you don't love her enough to change for good, then you might as well call it a done deal. Like I said before, this will take effort if you are to succeed at all in getting back your girlfriend.
Finally when you both agree that you want to try again, it is now that you can discuss the problems you faced in the past. Be aware that the both of you may not have the slightest
clue what bothers each other. It may never have been discussed before as it just sat there smoldering. If you are the type of person that holds everything in, you might honestly want to try handling problems in a different way. You may be surprised to learn that the issues that bothered you about her could be easily remedied had she been aware of them and vice versa. Discuss what you both want out of this relationship and what each of your expectations are. Don't get involved in playing the blame game and accept responsibility for your part that made the relationship fail.
This process can be painful and take quite some time. Soon you should find that you work together as a team instead of against each other. In the long run, working hard for something you want is worth all the effort and sacrifices made.
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by cassieann
Hi! My name is Cathi. I have four sons who are the center of my world. When I have some free time, I love to be outdoors on a Harley or paddling a canoe... more »
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