How a Single Mom Survived Marine Corps Boot Camp

Yes . . . I know there's a war going on. But that wasn't my concern when I made my son an offer he realized he couldn't refuse.

My son is basically a GOOD kid, but when he started his junior year in high school and lost his focus on school and playing baseball, everything changed. He changed his friends, his interests, and of course, his attitude changed too. All of that also changed our relationship. When I took him to the recruiter across town at the end of July, 2007, I had no idea what was in store for either of us. But I was desperate; and afterward, confident that whatever lied ahead, would definitely be better than what we'd been living through since he had graduated high school in June, 2006.

I guess I should have felt ashamed -- sending him off like I did. But frankly, I just didn't like him anymore. I didn't like the way he dressed; the people he associated with; the fact that he couldn't seem to find or keep a job; wasn't interested in doing anything productive, like going to college; the way he talked to me and my mother, like we owed him some thing; just his overall attitude. In a word, it SUCKED! All I wanted, what I think any caring parent wants, is to have their child grow up to be a responsible individual. Unfortunately, he wasn't showing any signs of getting there anytime soon.

While he was adamant about not joining any branch of the military, my mom and I had unsuccessfully tried to persuade him to join the Navy or Air Force (personally, I thought the Coast Guard would be safest). NEVER were the Marines on the radar. But when I found out what the Marine Corps had to offer in the way of discipline, I knew it was the one branch of service that he needed. Never mind that they are the "first to fight", they are inarguably, "The Few, The Proud" . . . just the challenge I believe my son needed.

I wasn't missing my son after he left. In fact, I was overjoyed with the idea that someone else was in his face making him do what I knew he didn't want to do. I felt relief that the weight of worry about him was over, at least for the time being. And I wasn't scared every time the news came on reporting yet another teenager who had either done something stupid and criminal, or sadly, had left this world much too early. I thank God daily that my son is not in this metropolitan area, but instead, sheltered from the evils that seem to plague our youth today.

But as the initial weeks began to go by without seeing him, I began searching online for information that would help me get through the long weeks ahead until graduation. I found a website at the end of July that I didn't return to until early October. That site was a GODsend to me and countless other people who have a son, daughter, relative, friend or loved one going through Marine Corps Recruit Training at Parris Island or San Diego.

Marine Parents kept me connected to my son. While there are several sections to the website that I frequented almost daily, we all start as Recruit Parents. It's the place where I went whenever I thought of my son, wondered how he was doing, or just wanted to vicariously experience what our children go through as shared by the wonderful people who connect there.

My dad was in the Army for 20 years and I remember there being a pride about that fact. But it doesn't come close to the pride and sense of belonging that I have acquired since my son's enlistment in early September, 2007.

As I read the messages on OUR Forum, an indescribable feeling washed over me, often times bringing tears, but mostly smiles and laughter. And whenever I have something to share or just want to reach out, I respond to the messages. In fact, another mother (whose son is also an only child and the same age as my son - now 21) contacted me and we spoke for the first time Thanksgiving, 2007. We found out that our sons were in the same platoon and we were reassured in knowing that our sons became friends as they endured those final weeks of boot camp.

I'm not going to tell you that the months apart were easy because they weren't. Especially for him, I know. But they were necessary for him to grow up and come to better understand what I diligently tried to instill in him. I've been told that the transformation is awesome and the "change forever." I hadn't even seen him when I originally wrote this in December, 2007, but I knew that it would be true. In fact, when I was thinking about seeing him again for the first time on Family Day, January 17, 2008 (4 months to the day he left) it made me realize that I liked him again.

And that's all I ever really wanted when I sent him to PI . . . to be able to LIKE the young man who I love SO dearly.

Since my son's Graduation (see photo and video below that another parent took), he has completed Marine Combat Training in NC and was promoted to PFC; finished MOS School (Aviation Maintenance Administrative Specialist) in MS, and is now stationed on the west coast. He was promoted to LCpl in early November, 2008.

Before July, 2008, he hadn't been home on leave since he graduated from boot camp. But I had two opportunities to briefly see him when he passed through Atlanta's airport on his way from NC to MS, and again when he left MS on his way to AZ. It was so good to see him, even though the time was short.

He finally got a 10 day leave in July, got himself home and didn't ask for a single cent the entire time he was here! Even treated 9 of us out ot dinner. I must say, the time he spent at home was SO much better than the leave time he had after boot camp!

Since he's been in the Marine Corps, he calls me often and we actually have conversations like 'normal' people do.

Yes, he's still adapting, adjusting and overcoming but he's doing well. And although he occasionally wants to complain about this or that, I always point out to him that he's lived in 4 states and traveled more than he ever would have had the opportunity to do, had he remained here. And at least he knows he's got a paycheck on the 1st and the 15th, a place to lay his head, clothes to wear and food to eat.

When I look back over these past 18 months, all I can do is smile daily thinking about God's Grace!

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