Always Taking Vacation Without The Children
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Should Parents Usually Take Vacation Without The Kids?
It's understandable when parents desire to travel during their vacations. It's even understandable, on occasion, for parents to get a few days to themselves - away from their children - as long as their children are being cared for and are being entertained themselves.
However, what about when parents leave their children home so often that family vacations rarely occur? When parents are working most of the time (when they are not on vacation) when do they get the opportunity to spend uninterrupted, quality time with their children if they don't take them on vacation? After all, even during vacation, parents can still manage to get some time to themselves, as a couple, and individually (if desired.)
Personally, I have taken my children with me on every vacation. I've grown used to sharing all aspects of my vacation with them and it becomes a highlight in our lives later when we can all discuss vacation memories, as they've been shared by each of us. There is no need of my children trying to imagine what I'm talking about because they know, firsthand.
Note: This photo was taken during our most recent family vacation. I'm photographed here with two of my three children.
Thanks to Steve Thompson for the Squid Art images.
Contents at a Glance
Should parents take most every vacation without their children?
Fetching blurbs now... please stand byYes
___ says:
@ Lizzie, you're a spoiled brat. Maybe when you actually have kids you can go back and "reassess" your own views:
We often get so caught up in our children and their pursuits that we forget about our partner ? and the marriage suffers. It's important to have regular time together before you have relationship questions and problems.
In this age of hyper-parenting many parents stop thinking about their marital bond and immerse themselves 100 percent in their children's pursuits and happiness. Being overly involved in children's lives does the children a disservice, and the pressures of parenting 365 days a year can create all manner of friction and unhappiness in a marriage.
Getting away without the kids will give you time to yourselves and time to remember what your relationship was like before you had kids.
Let's face it?without the kids around, it will be a lot easier for you to rekindle the flame and get romantic!
You're not selfish at all. Wanting to spend time with your spouse is a lovely sentiment?one we're sure they'll appreciate! And maybe once you return home, your kids will appreciate you both more too
Posted February 08, 2012
Momsbusy247 says:
No, it is the perfect time for parents to really connect with their kids. I have vivid memories of our family vacations, don't remember a whole lot else of my childhood.
Posted June 14, 2011
paperfacets says:
Each to their own lifestyle but we have taken our kids every year with us on vacation. Plus cousins, aunts, friends but rarely pets. The time we had the caged rat we had to take him to the vet.
People actually have said at work, "This all probably be our last vacation with the kids." Not our family and they have benefited so much. They have seen parts of the world (mostly CA) that gives them so many insights and
feelings that can be related to other people and living things.
Posted March 11, 2010
Allison says:
You are absolutely right. I have a relative who take a minimum of six vacations every year without his 9 year old...and this has been ongoing for the past 3 or 4 years. I feel so sorry for his child, who very shortly will begin to resent the fact that she is not welcomed. They have even taken her out of school for a week at a time so that she could go to the babysitter while they are on vacation. It is terribly upsetting to see
Posted January 11, 2009
RHEY HEDGES says:
Listen to Norma ... she is right 'on target' ... PLus ... She is a "Mother". Never argue with Momma!
Posted June 01, 2008
No
Lizzie says:
No way! My parents are extremely against vacationing without me (their only child), because they think vacations should be a FAMILY event, and not to leave out the kids! Leaving the kids at home while you go live it up in Jamaica is pretty low, in my opinion. I know a family that has never taken their two kids to Disneyland, Sea World, or anything like that - but the parents have been to Mexico, Jamaica, California, and all these beautiful places - and have NEVER TAKEN THEIR CHILDREN. One of them is fifteen and claims she doesn't mind, that she is used to it. USED TO IT! Used to being left out of getting away from daily life every once in a while. She went to Aruba once - and that's basically it. And get this - her mom's best friend was getting married, and they were planning on going to the out-of-state wedding as a family (parents plus two children - girl aged 15 and boy aged 10), and then all of a sudden, about two weeks before the wedding, the parents tell the kids they CAN'T go. I'm sorry, but I think that is INCREDIBLY selfish, and it made me SO angry! We had the 15 year old over (being my best friend) and she was really upset and even angry that her parents did that to her! Sorry, but I think that parents should take their kids on vacations with them, because as other users have said, they deserve it too! They don't have an "easy" life, and going somewhere different and beautiful is mentally stimulating and great for family bonding. I don't think a parents-only date night - or even a weekend - is a bad thing to do at all! It helps to get away sometimes, but not on elaborate vacations that the kids would absolutely LOVE. If you're worried about your kids "bothering" you on vacation, maybe you shouldn't have had kids, because they deserve love and attention and good things JUST AS MUCH AS YOU DO. So, consider these things. If you didn't find my earlier examples selfish, then I think you really need to sit down and reassess your views.
Posted December 31, 2011
Anita says:
No, this is just crazy to me to even think about! I mean there is nothing wrong wirh a night or two away but when your kids are at Granny's house or the babysitter or daycare more than they are with you then there is a problem. Kids need to know what family life is all about and get to enjoy things to. Whatever happened to Family Vacations? Kids get jilted just for being kids. Most parents work 40 hours a week, the kids go to daycare, get shoved off to a grandparents house, they have homework and have rough days like the rest of us. They in my eyes deserve a reward. And if your marriage lacks then a vacation isn't going to fix it! It will be the same once you get back. That is what therapy is for people! Being a parent is a 24/7 job you don't get a break from being a parent. I think its crappy that some people go on elaborate vacations and leave their kids at home!!!
Posted September 02, 2010
Mamabear says:
That I understand what most say. I searched this topic because I was raised to take your children with you on every vacation. But my fiance and I are planning to go to Hawaii for our honeymoon and while we take my boys on vacation with us (out of state or just camping) it would be nice to spend quality alone adult time without them for this one trip. Is that so bad? We promised to take them to Cali in the spring and they'll be staying with an uncle who we trust with all our hearts. And this way they also wont miss school.
Posted March 22, 2010
lakern26 says:
I wouldn't dream of going on vacation without my boys. My husband and I love spending time them, and they with us, and we love introducing them to the wonder of new places. I understand going by yourselves once in a while, but, constantly, that's just plain selfish.
Posted March 05, 2010
Shmobb says:
Absolutely not! Kids need time away as much as their parents do, and vacations are an excellent time for family bonding.
Posted October 06, 2009
Everyone Gets Tired
Children included
Children become tired of continually attending child care facilities or, as in the case with older children, trying to maintain good grades.
Everyone gets tired, therefore, everyone deserves a break...
Children need "alone" time with their parents during vacation.
They need to have time away from routines and responsibilities.
They need opportunities to explore other places; they need to be able to learn about other foods, people, and cultures.
They need time away from their friends so they can really learn to appreciate their friends.
They should see animals at the zoo, go to parks for family picnics, go to a water park or amusement park sometimes.
They need to relax and unwind.
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Vacations Without Children Guestbook
Is there anything you would like to add here which you didn't cover in the duel? Do you like this lens? Can you think of ways this lens can be improved? I would love to hear your impressions.
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Momsbusy247 Jun 14, 2011 @ 9:56 pm | delete
- Great lens and a great topic for a discussion.
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paperfacets Mar 11, 2010 @ 1:39 pm | delete
- Good topic for discussion.
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lakern26
Mar 5, 2010 @ 12:16 pm | delete
- You've chosen an excellent topic to debate and this lens is very well done. I find it appalling that so many parents exclude their children. I'm in total agreement with you ... families need "family time", that's part of what vacations are all about.
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Norma_Budden
Mar 5, 2010 @ 5:14 pm | delete
- Thanks for your wonderful comments. I couldn't imagine not reminiscing about vacation with my children; the winters would be so boring without talking to them about past vacations and planning for future travels. I almost dread the thought of my oldest daughter turning 18 within the next 3 years. That will be a big adjustment for me...
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by Norma_Budden
I enjoy traveling and must say that I cannot imagine traveling without my children. Even when the rare occasion calls for me to travel without them,... more »
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