Dr Teri Speed - Author of "The Incurables: Healing Mind Body and Spirit"
Dr. Teri Speed was a highly successful Surgeon for years when she became dissatisfied with the basic way that the medical profession only addressed one aspect of patients humanity. The physical...
This is how she has found herself as a nationally known author and much sought after speaker in the holistic health field. Her experiences and ongoing practice is giving birth to knew articles and another book, as you read these words.
Take a few moments to consider what she has to say...
Floyd Bogart
Why Won't These Memories Leave Me Alone?
How can I break the Broken Record in my brain?
by Dr Teri Speed
Memories are stored in the brain, for the most part. When we remember an event, a certain set of chemicals are dumped into the brain. These chemicals are identical to the ones originally dumped into the brain when the event took place. So, let us make an analogy so that this will be easy to talk about.
Let's say that you were driving down the road, and suddenly a car appeared in your lane of traffic heading straight for you. You realized that you were going to have a head-on collision. Your life went into slow motion. Everything appeared as if it were happening in Jello. The voices were slow, the cars looked like toys, then the crash occurred.
Lying in the hospital with tubes and wires and strange beeping sounds, you remember this moment in time vividly. Fear produced adrenaline, which coursed through your body. A certain set of chemicals were dumped into your brain at the moment of the crash. Because of the intensity of the situation, your body went into a survival mode. Because your body was looking at everything in an instant, it was determining which way to swerve, how to stop, how to survive.
Smells occurred at the crash sight. Sights and Sounds occurred as well. Certain temperatures were noted, the rain may have poured. Everything about that event was recorded in the brain permanently. It was recorded in such a way that just the smell of rain may tip you off and trigger a trip down memory lane for you. It may be the smell of blood. It may be the pain of a broken leg that sends you back to that moment.
Whatever the trigger, you are able to go back to that scene instantly. Willingly or unwillingly, you travel the highways of the brain's memory lane, to that terrible disaster. How is it that you can recall every excruciatingly perfect detail of the accident? Certain chemicals were dumped into your brain for that moment and that event. Let us for argument's sake call this brain concoction of chemicals a glass of bourbon. So every time your brain is triggered by something to remember the wreck, you dump a large serving of bourbon into your brain. It really becomes easy to recall the tiniest details, because with just the mention of slippery roads, your brain goes into fast-forward, dumps a serving of bourbon into your brain, and bingo, you are back there experiencing the flashing lights, the broken leg, the oncoming traffic, the head-on collision, and the shock.
No matter how hard you try you cannot get that memory out of your head. The cold sweats wake you in the middle of the night. The sudden shock immobilizes you when a rainstorm surprises you. Just a car's headlights coming toward you is enough to get you into instant replay. Not even the pro-sports announcers could compete with the speed with which you are able to replay your crash. Talk about instant replay, they should be inside your head!
There really is only one problem with this scenario. You don't like bourbon, and don't want to recall that event any longer. Once you understand how the brain works, it is an easy thing to change a memory and forever change the repeated flash-backs.
Here is how I do it. This is not the only way to be healed of a mental torment, but this works, and I like results. OK, here goes. Recall the memory. I know you don't want to, but this time we will do it deliberately with a different outcome.
After you have gotten yourself fully into the memory, cold sweats and all, invite the person that you trust most in the world to step into the memory. This trusted person may be Jesus, an angel, your favorite uncle. I really don't care who it is so long as you really trust them, and can willingly invite them into your traumatic memory. Once the trusted person is in the memory, turn your focus from the event to the trusted person. Then back to the memory, then to the trusted person again. Next just focus on the trusted friend, and allow the memory to play all by itself, without your help. The sights and sounds and smells will all be present, but your focus is now on your trusted friend. To make a very long story short, your bourbon has turned into a Sweet Old Fashion. By inviting someone new into the memory, you can never again experience that same old bourbon. It is impossible. Sort of like throwing a red sock into a load of white laundry. Those clothes will forever be pink. And so will your brain.
Memories are stored in the brain, for the most part. When we remember an event, a certain set of chemicals are dumped into the brain. These chemicals are identical to the ones originally dumped into the brain when the event took place. So, let us make an analogy so that this will be easy to talk about.
Let's say that you were driving down the road, and suddenly a car appeared in your lane of traffic heading straight for you. You realized that you were going to have a head-on collision. Your life went into slow motion. Everything appeared as if it were happening in Jello. The voices were slow, the cars looked like toys, then the crash occurred.
Lying in the hospital with tubes and wires and strange beeping sounds, you remember this moment in time vividly. Fear produced adrenaline, which coursed through your body. A certain set of chemicals were dumped into your brain at the moment of the crash. Because of the intensity of the situation, your body went into a survival mode. Because your body was looking at everything in an instant, it was determining which way to swerve, how to stop, how to survive.
Smells occurred at the crash sight. Sights and Sounds occurred as well. Certain temperatures were noted, the rain may have poured. Everything about that event was recorded in the brain permanently. It was recorded in such a way that just the smell of rain may tip you off and trigger a trip down memory lane for you. It may be the smell of blood. It may be the pain of a broken leg that sends you back to that moment.
Whatever the trigger, you are able to go back to that scene instantly. Willingly or unwillingly, you travel the highways of the brain's memory lane, to that terrible disaster. How is it that you can recall every excruciatingly perfect detail of the accident? Certain chemicals were dumped into your brain for that moment and that event. Let us for argument's sake call this brain concoction of chemicals a glass of bourbon. So every time your brain is triggered by something to remember the wreck, you dump a large serving of bourbon into your brain. It really becomes easy to recall the tiniest details, because with just the mention of slippery roads, your brain goes into fast-forward, dumps a serving of bourbon into your brain, and bingo, you are back there experiencing the flashing lights, the broken leg, the oncoming traffic, the head-on collision, and the shock.
No matter how hard you try you cannot get that memory out of your head. The cold sweats wake you in the middle of the night. The sudden shock immobilizes you when a rainstorm surprises you. Just a car's headlights coming toward you is enough to get you into instant replay. Not even the pro-sports announcers could compete with the speed with which you are able to replay your crash. Talk about instant replay, they should be inside your head!
There really is only one problem with this scenario. You don't like bourbon, and don't want to recall that event any longer. Once you understand how the brain works, it is an easy thing to change a memory and forever change the repeated flash-backs.
Here is how I do it. This is not the only way to be healed of a mental torment, but this works, and I like results. OK, here goes. Recall the memory. I know you don't want to, but this time we will do it deliberately with a different outcome.
After you have gotten yourself fully into the memory, cold sweats and all, invite the person that you trust most in the world to step into the memory. This trusted person may be Jesus, an angel, your favorite uncle. I really don't care who it is so long as you really trust them, and can willingly invite them into your traumatic memory. Once the trusted person is in the memory, turn your focus from the event to the trusted person. Then back to the memory, then to the trusted person again. Next just focus on the trusted friend, and allow the memory to play all by itself, without your help. The sights and sounds and smells will all be present, but your focus is now on your trusted friend. To make a very long story short, your bourbon has turned into a Sweet Old Fashion. By inviting someone new into the memory, you can never again experience that same old bourbon. It is impossible. Sort of like throwing a red sock into a load of white laundry. Those clothes will forever be pink. And so will your brain.
Stress Anxiety and Unmet Expectations
by Dr Teri Speed
Stress is the body's response to something that happens. This something can occur inside the body or outside.
Doctor's categorize stressors as major or minor. Below is a short list of some major stressors: Job change, marriage, divorce, birth, death, retirement, children moving out of the house, losing your driver's license, financial dependence, health challenges.
Minor stressors would be things like: your child throwing up in your car, your spouse yelling at you, a speeding ticket, your boss handing you ten days of work and giving you two days to complete it.
We live with "stress" everyday. It is not the event that creates a problem. The response to that event is our barometer.
So, when your boss hands you ten days of work, and requires it to be done in two, what would you do? Would you immediately blow a gasket then rant and rave about how unfair your boss is? Or would you put your head down and begin the work?
Think of it this way. Things happen. Things happen to you and me. Every day. As long as you are on this side of the grass, things will happen. Our coping mechanisms are the variable that will either have us yelping like a kicked puppy or calmly doing the work.
Do an inventory of yourself. Are you feeling tired in the morning, irritable, worrying, tossing in bed, headaches, chest pains, feeling out of control, emotionally up and down, or having trouble concentrating? You may be having trouble with handling stress.
"Ok, Sherlock, " you may be saying right now. But wait a minute, do you want to live like this, and continue this feeling? Or would you like to develop new strategies for feeling good and productive?
First, identify your stressors. This should be an easy task. It will be the very things that set you instantly into orbiting Jupiter. Next identify your reaction to that stressor. For example, When your boss gives you ten days worth of work and says, "I expect to have that report on my desk in two days," Does your blood pressure rise, and your mind begin to scream at you, "OK this is the last straw! I am going to find a new job?"
In the blink of an eye, you have changed a minor stressor into a major stressor, and your mind doesn't know the difference. Your mind is now preparing you to quit your job. It begins dumping chemicals into your brain that are associated with the "fight-or-flight" response. You have chosen to flee, therefore your brain is designed to help you flee. You are pumped full of adrenaline, your entire body is ready to leap from your chair, tell you boss off and never return. The only problem with this scenario is that your family depends on your income. Quitting, and attacking your boss is in conflict with the chemicals pumping through your veins. Now you have STRESS!
So the question becomes: Can you create a different reaction? The answer is yes. First identify the stressor. In this case it is your unreasonable boss. Once the stressor is identified, determine what choices you have. 1. You could quit, go without a paycheck and create a major stressor in your life and the life of your family. 2. You could accept your boss as unreasonable, expect him to continue his behavior, and be thankful for your job. 3. You could continue having the same stress reaction and expecting a different outcome. (By the way, this is defined as insanity)
Let us say that you choose to stay at your job, and EXPECT your boss to be unreasonable. Your job then becomes a place of laughter because you have changed YOUR expectations. You will expect your boss to be unreasonable, and he will be. You will expect him to make unreasonable demands, and he will. As he confirms your expectations, you are able to laugh at the situation. This is a far cry from you expecting your boss to change or to become reasonable.
So look at your life as a fun experiment. Play with the idea. Expect the cars next to you to drive like idiots, then laugh when they do.
Stress is the body's response to something that happens. This something can occur inside the body or outside.
Doctor's categorize stressors as major or minor. Below is a short list of some major stressors: Job change, marriage, divorce, birth, death, retirement, children moving out of the house, losing your driver's license, financial dependence, health challenges.
Minor stressors would be things like: your child throwing up in your car, your spouse yelling at you, a speeding ticket, your boss handing you ten days of work and giving you two days to complete it.
We live with "stress" everyday. It is not the event that creates a problem. The response to that event is our barometer.
So, when your boss hands you ten days of work, and requires it to be done in two, what would you do? Would you immediately blow a gasket then rant and rave about how unfair your boss is? Or would you put your head down and begin the work?
Think of it this way. Things happen. Things happen to you and me. Every day. As long as you are on this side of the grass, things will happen. Our coping mechanisms are the variable that will either have us yelping like a kicked puppy or calmly doing the work.
Do an inventory of yourself. Are you feeling tired in the morning, irritable, worrying, tossing in bed, headaches, chest pains, feeling out of control, emotionally up and down, or having trouble concentrating? You may be having trouble with handling stress.
"Ok, Sherlock, " you may be saying right now. But wait a minute, do you want to live like this, and continue this feeling? Or would you like to develop new strategies for feeling good and productive?
First, identify your stressors. This should be an easy task. It will be the very things that set you instantly into orbiting Jupiter. Next identify your reaction to that stressor. For example, When your boss gives you ten days worth of work and says, "I expect to have that report on my desk in two days," Does your blood pressure rise, and your mind begin to scream at you, "OK this is the last straw! I am going to find a new job?"
In the blink of an eye, you have changed a minor stressor into a major stressor, and your mind doesn't know the difference. Your mind is now preparing you to quit your job. It begins dumping chemicals into your brain that are associated with the "fight-or-flight" response. You have chosen to flee, therefore your brain is designed to help you flee. You are pumped full of adrenaline, your entire body is ready to leap from your chair, tell you boss off and never return. The only problem with this scenario is that your family depends on your income. Quitting, and attacking your boss is in conflict with the chemicals pumping through your veins. Now you have STRESS!
So the question becomes: Can you create a different reaction? The answer is yes. First identify the stressor. In this case it is your unreasonable boss. Once the stressor is identified, determine what choices you have. 1. You could quit, go without a paycheck and create a major stressor in your life and the life of your family. 2. You could accept your boss as unreasonable, expect him to continue his behavior, and be thankful for your job. 3. You could continue having the same stress reaction and expecting a different outcome. (By the way, this is defined as insanity)
Let us say that you choose to stay at your job, and EXPECT your boss to be unreasonable. Your job then becomes a place of laughter because you have changed YOUR expectations. You will expect your boss to be unreasonable, and he will be. You will expect him to make unreasonable demands, and he will. As he confirms your expectations, you are able to laugh at the situation. This is a far cry from you expecting your boss to change or to become reasonable.
So look at your life as a fun experiment. Play with the idea. Expect the cars next to you to drive like idiots, then laugh when they do.
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Tell Them You Love Them - Today!
by Dr Teri Speed
Most of our life is spent struggling. We struggle to make ends meet, get the job done, and help put out the fires of the daily grind. Whether we like it or not, we often take for granted the simple things in life. Think I'm off base?
When was the last time you called your best friend just to tell them how much you appreciate them?
When was the last time you sat down and wrote an old fashioned snail mail thank-you?
Did you hug your partner as they walked out of the door this morning? Or were you exasperated because they didn't take out the trash again?
Did you hug your child as they left for school? Or did you yell at them for not making their bed?
When was the last time you wrote a list of the blessings in your life?
When was the last time you stopped your car to take in a field of beautiful flowers? If you are like me, late for that appointment, you glance at the flowers, stating, " Oh, aren't those beautiful?" Then as quickly as the thought comes, it disappears.
My children have taught me more lessons than I would like to admit. Just this morning, as we were completing our chores, and rushing to the bus stop, my daughter turned and looked at me. "Mom, you really are the greatest Mom of all time. I'm sorry that I don't tell you more often." She jumped out of the truck, slammed the door, and ran for the bus stop.
"What did she say?" I mumbled to the air.
Just a moment in the frenzy of the day. Just a kind word. Just a moment to acknowledge another person.
Stunned by the silence of the closed door, I sat behind the steering wheel and couldn't drive. My mind was no longer whirling frantically about the day. My mind no longer jumped from fire to fire. In an instant, my daughter had taught me a lesson that I could never explain to her. She had taken just a moment, just a thought, and changed my entire outlook. Where was that rebellious teenager that I had become a punching bag for? Where was that demanding childish attitude?
Surely it hadn't gone far. But for an instant, I cried tears of joy. For the rest of the day, my heart ached with love. In the smallest of time, in the instant between thoughts, she changed me. Had I talked and lectured to her all day about some important topic, I could never have done for her what she did for me in that few words. She took an ordinary day in the life of a crazy world, and added a bouquet of wonderful thoughts.
You may imagine that for the rest of the day, I acted differently. Instead of plowing through the work, never looking up into the eyes of another, I attempted to find something pleasant to pass along.
What my daughter had started before slamming the door, continued to ripple from me, through the town and community as I followed suit. I hope I remember to do the same for her this evening.
Most of our life is spent struggling. We struggle to make ends meet, get the job done, and help put out the fires of the daily grind. Whether we like it or not, we often take for granted the simple things in life. Think I'm off base?
When was the last time you called your best friend just to tell them how much you appreciate them?
When was the last time you sat down and wrote an old fashioned snail mail thank-you?
Did you hug your partner as they walked out of the door this morning? Or were you exasperated because they didn't take out the trash again?
Did you hug your child as they left for school? Or did you yell at them for not making their bed?
When was the last time you wrote a list of the blessings in your life?
When was the last time you stopped your car to take in a field of beautiful flowers? If you are like me, late for that appointment, you glance at the flowers, stating, " Oh, aren't those beautiful?" Then as quickly as the thought comes, it disappears.
My children have taught me more lessons than I would like to admit. Just this morning, as we were completing our chores, and rushing to the bus stop, my daughter turned and looked at me. "Mom, you really are the greatest Mom of all time. I'm sorry that I don't tell you more often." She jumped out of the truck, slammed the door, and ran for the bus stop.
"What did she say?" I mumbled to the air.
Just a moment in the frenzy of the day. Just a kind word. Just a moment to acknowledge another person.
Stunned by the silence of the closed door, I sat behind the steering wheel and couldn't drive. My mind was no longer whirling frantically about the day. My mind no longer jumped from fire to fire. In an instant, my daughter had taught me a lesson that I could never explain to her. She had taken just a moment, just a thought, and changed my entire outlook. Where was that rebellious teenager that I had become a punching bag for? Where was that demanding childish attitude?
Surely it hadn't gone far. But for an instant, I cried tears of joy. For the rest of the day, my heart ached with love. In the smallest of time, in the instant between thoughts, she changed me. Had I talked and lectured to her all day about some important topic, I could never have done for her what she did for me in that few words. She took an ordinary day in the life of a crazy world, and added a bouquet of wonderful thoughts.
You may imagine that for the rest of the day, I acted differently. Instead of plowing through the work, never looking up into the eyes of another, I attempted to find something pleasant to pass along.
What my daughter had started before slamming the door, continued to ripple from me, through the town and community as I followed suit. I hope I remember to do the same for her this evening.
Do Small Things With Great Love
by Dr Teri Speed
Do small things with great love. What does that mean? How can I do laundry with great love when I detest the chore? How can I smile when my mind is screaming, "get me out of here?" "Give me something important to do!"
If you look at your day you might find that it is made up of millions of simple events. And in those simple events, your life is formed. By looking at the simple choices that are made all day long, you will find your destiny. Most of these events, if looked at in isolation would appear to be unimportant . But taken in larger chucks, they are called life. Let us take for example, morning chores. You may rise early and make coffee. Grab the paper, and see what is going on in the world. Eat a bite of breakfast, and rush off to work.
Most of us do these things without thinking about them. We are like little robots of routine. And God forbid that something would change our routine. Any change would throw us into a tail spin that would last the entire day.
I am sorry to say that the complacency of life overtakes us all at some point. There are however, islands of hope in this sea of complacency. Each event could be made into life changing, life altering moments. How? Well, let us take one as an example.
Tomorrow, as you are walking out to get the paper, pick a flower and place it by your coffee cup. This way, every time you look at your coffee cup, you are reminded of great beauty. Just by taking a breath and enjoying the perfection of the flower, you have added beauty and majesty to your day. Your entire day will be changed by this simple flower.
Would you sacrifice anything by looking for loving ways to brighten other's day? Certainly not. Give the flower to a secretary as you walk into a building. Spread the wealth of joy.
"But I don't have time to think of anything else," you may lament. Try this for one day, and see if you don't receive more than you have given.
It is a strange phenomenon, but it is not the huge momentous events that determine the course of our lives. It is the small everyday chores that alter our very existence.
So look up today from your own rushed, frantic, hurried thoughts, and treat yourself and others to the beauty of this moment. Treat this moment as if it were your favorite. Smile when you talk. Put a flower on your desk. Love yourself and others today in simple yet profound ways. Look up at the moon and take it in. Listen to great music while you do the laundry. Draw a smiley face in the dirt on your car. Enjoy the moment.
"We cannot do great things on earth. We can only do little things with great love." Mother Teresa.
Do small things with great love. What does that mean? How can I do laundry with great love when I detest the chore? How can I smile when my mind is screaming, "get me out of here?" "Give me something important to do!"
If you look at your day you might find that it is made up of millions of simple events. And in those simple events, your life is formed. By looking at the simple choices that are made all day long, you will find your destiny. Most of these events, if looked at in isolation would appear to be unimportant . But taken in larger chucks, they are called life. Let us take for example, morning chores. You may rise early and make coffee. Grab the paper, and see what is going on in the world. Eat a bite of breakfast, and rush off to work.
Most of us do these things without thinking about them. We are like little robots of routine. And God forbid that something would change our routine. Any change would throw us into a tail spin that would last the entire day.
I am sorry to say that the complacency of life overtakes us all at some point. There are however, islands of hope in this sea of complacency. Each event could be made into life changing, life altering moments. How? Well, let us take one as an example.
Tomorrow, as you are walking out to get the paper, pick a flower and place it by your coffee cup. This way, every time you look at your coffee cup, you are reminded of great beauty. Just by taking a breath and enjoying the perfection of the flower, you have added beauty and majesty to your day. Your entire day will be changed by this simple flower.
Would you sacrifice anything by looking for loving ways to brighten other's day? Certainly not. Give the flower to a secretary as you walk into a building. Spread the wealth of joy.
"But I don't have time to think of anything else," you may lament. Try this for one day, and see if you don't receive more than you have given.
It is a strange phenomenon, but it is not the huge momentous events that determine the course of our lives. It is the small everyday chores that alter our very existence.
So look up today from your own rushed, frantic, hurried thoughts, and treat yourself and others to the beauty of this moment. Treat this moment as if it were your favorite. Smile when you talk. Put a flower on your desk. Love yourself and others today in simple yet profound ways. Look up at the moon and take it in. Listen to great music while you do the laundry. Draw a smiley face in the dirt on your car. Enjoy the moment.
"We cannot do great things on earth. We can only do little things with great love." Mother Teresa.
