Distinctive and Beneficial Gifts
Tuberculosis Guy Mask
The perfect accessory for Swine Flu season
Remember the tuberculosis guy? It was May of '07 when the selfish twit risked starting a TB epidemic because he wanted to get to Paris for his wedding. Pretty romantic, eh?
The best thing to come out of it was the cool masks shown on nationwide television.These masks are great for household projects (dusting, yard work) or just scaring the kids.
3M 1870 Surgical Mask N95 ANTI-BACTERIAL MASK 20/BX "SPECIAL 3 DAY SALE"
Amazon Price: $59.99 (as of 07/14/2009) 
Hef Hats
Join the Hef-hat in-crowd
How this missed being a hot fashion trend is beyond me. Well, I'm not giving up. I think it would be a great party favor for bachelor parties. Or just a goofy replacement for the typical trucker hat.
Cotton Captain Cap-Embroidered Captain
You'll cut a dashing figure in this snappy captain's cap. If it works for Hef, it's a slam dunk for you! For ten bucks you can't go wrong.
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Captain & Tennille - The TV Specials (Hawaii / New Orleans / Songbook)
Here's a guy who slapped on a captain's cap and--voilà!--a career!
Amazon Price: $34.99 (as of 07/14/2009)
F R A G I L E
Treat that special someone to a "major award"
Fans of the movie A Christmas Story know what I'm talking about here. This is your chance to have your very own leg lamp!
Hef connection: Can you believe it? A Christmas Story is based on a series of stories Jean Shepherd wrote for Playboy magazine in the 1960s.
The Cleveland home where the movie was filmed is now a tourist attraction.
Christmas Story 40-Inch Leg Lamp
The perfect compliment to the office or rumpus room!
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
"A Christmas Story" 25th Anniversary Celebration & Convention Nov. 28 & 29, 2008
If you missed the 2008 event, maybe they'll have one this year...
Sign up on the Christmas Story website to receive updates.
Headquarters is the sumptuous Renaissance Cleveland Hotel! For "A Christmas Story" fans coming from outside downtown Cleveland the Renaissance Cleveland Hotel is offering all-inclusive accommodations packages. Hotel guests get two complementary Ralphie Passes and early access to an exclusive meet and greet with the actors Saturday morning.
Armadillo Handbag
Would I steer you wrong? This armadillo handbag is a hot item.Amazon customer review:
Funny *****
Cheap and entertaining, this bag is a hit at work. We were surfing the internet one night and decided he would be a great greeter for our guests. Everyone loves him, I highly recommend!
Armadillo Handbag
This 14" long stuffed Armadillo Handbag is made of cloth and has a small handy zipper pouch in its back. Whether you take it to the opera or the zoo, you're sure to be the envy of anyone who really likes armadillos. Bagged with illustrated tag.
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Funky Chicken
You've never known therapeutic release until you've tried running around in a chicken costume.If you've been struggling with an impulse to don a chicken suit, I say go ahead! Live a little! There are worse impulses after all.
Celebrities who have worn chicken costumes include Tom Cruise and Woody Allen.
Chicken Supreme Suit Adult Costume Adult (Standard One-Size)
Amazon Price: $149.99 (as of 07/14/2009)
Make Sure Your Baby is the Center of Attention
Self-esteem issues can start early. Make sure your baby gets plenty of ego-boosting attention with this whimsical lobster costume. Maybe when she grows up she won't need a therapeutic romp in a chicken suit.Infant Lobster Bunting Costume
This Lobster Costume will make your little one look absolutely delicious! Features includes bunting and snap on hood. One size fits all babies up to 28 inches.
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Decorative Dogs
What would Cesar think?
Is your dog earning his keep? This is an effortless way to get more from your dog. Enlist him as part of the decor. You won't have pack leader issues when you stick your dog in a goofy getup!
MEDIUM - MUSTARD - Hot Dog Halloween Costume
These irresistibly cute Pet Costumes dress up your dog. Turn any occasion into a hilarious photo opportunity. Great fun for parties, family gatherings, holidays and special events.
Amazon Price: $6.99 (as of 07/14/2009)
MEDIUM - Dogzilla Dog Costume
Unleash your very own Dogzilla this Halloween and make your pet the life of the party!
Amazon Price: $9.39 (as of 07/14/2009)
MEDIUM - LITTLE STINKER - Dog Halloween Costume
# All pet costumes are made to be comfortable and adorable
# Casual Canine Lil' Stinker Costumes are super fun!
Amazon Price: $8.99 (as of 07/14/2009)
Casual Canine Piggy Pooch Costume - MEDIUM
Piggy Pooch is fun and irresistibly cute!
Amazon Price: $8.79 (as of 07/14/2009)
MEDIUM - FOOTBALL FEVER - Pet Halloween Costume
Let your pet be the only tailgater with a tail! Includes a soft football helmet and plush football. Machine washable.
Amazon Price: $5.38 (as of 07/14/2009)
Wacky Windups
All seriousness aside, these windups are fun for kids who have Aspergers.Amazon review:
My 7 year old son got this as a gift from us. He has Aspergers, so loves how things work, gears, etc.. This toy is so cool! It is much smaller than I thought (about the palm of your hand). It also is fragile. Our two year old ripped off one of the legs. But then again, it's not meant for two year olds!! It winds up and bounces all over the place. The only con I have is that it doesn't stay wound for long. I think you get about 10 seconds at most out of the wind up. But it still is worth the buy. I will buy these as future gifts for all ages over 7! Would be a very cool office desk toy!
OH, I should note that it still works great with one less leg! :)
Very unique conversation piece. My kids (9,7 and 2) love it!!
Pintacuda Windup
Amazon Price: $13.51 (as of 07/14/2009)
Katita Wind Up Gear Box
Amazon Price: $9.95 (as of 07/14/2009)
Cosmojetz Wind Up Gear Box
Amazon Price: $10.95 (as of 07/14/2009)
Awika! Wind Up
Amazon Price: $12.45 (as of 07/14/2009)
Oahaca
Amazon Price: $13.91 (as of 07/14/2009)
Pogo Stick
Isn't it about time for a pogo stick craze?
Kids get exercise and improve balance and coordination. Grownups aren't above using them. You get a vigorous whole-body workout. Seems like they'd be a good device for shaking off rolls of fat.Flybar Foam Master Pogo Stick (Silver/Blue)
The Flybar Foam Master Pogo Stick is a modern design adaptation of the classic toy. It's sure to promote healthy and exciting fun for boys and girls of all ages. A great introduction to pogo stick jumping--perfect for the beginner and for intermediate riders--it's ideal for jumpers aged 9 years and older. It features a rugged metal frame covered in precision-made foam, replaceable non-slip foot pads, easy-grip handles, and a rubber tip to help you stay in control. As a safety precaution, it is recommended to always use a helmet.
Amazon Price: $35.57 (as of 07/14/2009)
Make a Statement!
Attention-getting shirts for every occasion
These t-shirts have references to cool movies & tv shows. Let people know you're hip & with it.Don't Hassle Locals Dark T-Shirt
Worn by Bobby Wiley, Dr. Leo Marvin's most challenging patient. (What About Bob?)
Price: 26.99
Vandelay Industries Yellow T-Shirt
Art Vandelay's world-famous latex enterprise. (Seinfeld)
Price: 22.99
Eat it Raw Organic Cotton Tee
Price: 23.99
Fashion Misstatements
Strike a blow for individuality! Buy something hideous today!
"You'd be hard-pressed to find someone who has not fallen under the spell of a fashion trend that, in hindsight, was the worst faux pas ever," says msn.com. Their hit list includes ponchos, harem pants, spandex pants, shoulder pads, and mullets among others.Shout out to J-Lo! More people should thumb their noses at fickle fashion mavens who look down on those who wear what they like, regardless of fashion whim.
Take the fanny pack, for instance. I've known for years that they are a no-no. They brand you as a hopeless fashion clod. They only way you'll get me to give up my fanny pack is to pry my cold, dead fingers...(you know the rest).
Alpaca wool poncho with hood, 'Andean Classic'
Amazon Price: $155.95 (as of 07/14/2009)
NEW Ladies Belly Dance Chiffon Harem Dancing Pants, Available in Black, Red, Purple, and Blue
Coming back! msn: "Unfortunately, a comeback may be in the works; recent YSL ads feature Naomi Campbell in a sparkly pair."
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Multiple Pocket Fanny Pack by Everest
Average Customer Review: ★★★★★ (13 reviews)
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Woman's Cotton Lycra Legging Tights
Spandex pants coming back! msn: ""I'm baffled by why shiny leggings are coming back," says Patricia Mears, deputy director for The Museum at FIT (the Fashion Institute of Technology).
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
Mullet Super Wig Blonde Trailer Trash Joe Dirt Costume Wig Halloween
Amazon Price: (as of 07/14/2009)
We Welcome Your Comments
I hope this glimpse at the world of wacky gift-giving made your day!
A word about "tweaked." I guess today's slang definition is drug-related. In a more innocent time, "tweaked" was slang for weird, eccentric, oddball, not right in the head.
RufusQuail wrote...
in reply to Tipi Hi Susie. Fine with me. That t-shirt is from Cafe Press, I believe. I've seen "What About Bob" at least 5 times and it still makes me laugh. I hope you sell some. My commercial efforts have yielded zilch. When you and Shelly were going to buy an Armadillo handbag is as close as I have come to actually selling something. Someone bought a couple of Hef hats, then changed his mind.
Posted June 05, 2009
Tipi wrote...
Zack, how's it going? - Would you mind if I copied you and posted the Local T-shirt on some of my local lens? - I meant to ask you before...but you know how shy I am.
Susie
Posted June 05, 2009
RufusQuail wrote...
in reply to Tipi Congratulations on winning the prestigious Minnow Award. I too am putting off starting any more lenses. Ideas are slow in coming. Thanks Tipi for featuring my lenses and all of your kind comments.
Posted February 20, 2009
Tipi wrote...
I once got The Minnow Award from a lensmaster, haven't heard about the Dwarfs yet, but there could be that too. - I'm putting off starting more lenses too, seems I have enough to work on and update...it keeps me busy! - Best Wishes! :)
Posted February 19, 2009
RufusQuail wrote...
in reply to Shelly I'm lucky to have friends in high places (Chef Keem). I'm going to leave the Armadillo there. In the unlikely event someone clicks on it, I hope they won't suffer from shopper frustration. I could do a lens on procrastination, if I ever get around do doing another one. It's a miracle I've done ten. Do they have a Dwarf Squid club, like the giants?
Posted February 16, 2009
Shelly wrote
Hi Rufus, I was just talking with Tipi and mentioned that you could do a great lens on procrastination. Susie said she could do a great lens on the subject as well, the problem is........our old friend procrastination does have it's way with us. I see Chef Keem is appreciating your work and blessing your lenses, it's nice to have angels around us!
It's nice so get to see the the Armadillo handbags, you could leave it up as a monument to their demise. [in reply to RufusQuail]
Posted February 15, 2009
chefkeem wrote...
Blessed be your sense of humor and creativity, Rufus! :-)
Posted February 10, 2009
RufusQuail wrote...
in reply to Shelly Thanks for coming back Shelly. I think those Armadillos are gone for good. I guess I'll have to take 'em off my lens, but there's no hurry. There I go--procrastinating again.
Posted February 09, 2009
Shelly wrote
Hi Rufus, just came back to check if possibly, maybe...guess not available yet! When lost in the wilderness, it's helpful to have left path markers, but I'm wondering how one would do that when lost in hesitation and procrastination--one never knows who or what they'll run into out there. Maybe it's actually a healthy thing, maybe not. I've actually never been good about leaving path markers.[in reply to RufusQuail]
Posted February 09, 2009
RufusQuail wrote...
in reply to Shelly Dang, those last two Armadillos went quick. Yes, I'm a great procrastinator too. He who hesitates is lost. I'm lost in a wilderness of hesitation.
Posted February 05, 2009
by RufusQuail
--Thank you!--
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