Why, welcome to my page! Come in, come in, sit down and relax! For today, I'm going to weave about your magical spell as I recite yet again the one of the Lost Fables of Fone-Frolicking Fantasy known as.....
Unlocking The Enchanted iPhone - A Fabulous Fun Fable
Are you ready? Are you listening closely? Okay, let me begin. It was a dark and stormy knight, and he knocked on my door and said:
"Fair Maiden, I beg the following boon of thee!"
Yes, I know, the generic lingo of dark stormy knights has bunches of adorable "thees" and "thous" sprinkled it. It's a knight thing, you know?
You see, dark stormy knights are often like those magnificent noble defenders of chivalry and justice found at the Medieval Times. Those resemble:
"Ahem, Fair Maiden, I said....."
Oops, sorry, I know, I apologize for the distraction, I was merely giving the readers a background of dark stormy knights.
Anywhos! After I first contacted the local SPOCK (Society for the Prevention Of Cruelty to Knights) opened the door to see this brooding dark stormy knight standing on my front porch (along with his trusty unicorn Charlie), I immediately realized he was on his last legs of consciousness! So of course I gently sang out in my most dulcet Xena-like voice,
"How might I assist you?"
And as he painfully whispered,
"Milady, the enchanted iPhone! (gasp!) The enchanted iPhone! (gasp!)(gasp!) You......must......unlock the Enchanted iPhone!"
.... I saw him slip agonizingly into the soul-searing unrelenting embrace of eternal slumber. (Insert ominious tone here!)
And I said to myself:
Coffee. I need more coffee.
Mother always said, "When faced with dark stormy knights who send you on an impossible quest, ladies always brew fresh coffee. And then rouse your chained male and ride to the rescue!"
Speaking about my mom, I'm pretty sure she meant...
You know, I've often wondered about that last part. Chained male? I never have chained my husband nor my kids nor the various and sundry senseis at my karate dojo (although to think on it, several of them would look mighty spiffy if their brawny muscles were adorned with...
Ooops, sorry, got a wee bit carried away with that! Instead, I think she meant:
Fetching RSS feed... please stand by"Ummm, Fair Maiden, about that unlocked iPhone...."
Oops, sorry! I was just reminiscing about some of the rather unique bits of wisdom mothers always give their children. Where was I?
Ah yes! So! Armed with freshly brewed coffee and my sexy sleeveless karate gi, I realized I needed to understand just what that dark stormy knight meant!
Unlock the enchanted iPhone?
To what on earth would that refer? Now, I knew all about your common garden-variety unlocked iPhones because you can get really nifty deals on them at eBay (heck, you can get tremendous deals on virtually ANYTHING from eBay, and it's free to sign there too! I wrote up a neat little How To guide over at 
How to join eBay and save bunches of money! - do check it out, you'll love what you learn!).
Just look at the current unlocked iPhones available right now:
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byBut....unlock the ENCHANTED IPHONE? What the heck could that be?
Could it be a message from beyond the universe?
But...an ENCHANTED IPHONE???
I started searching on Google for anything referring to an enchanted iPhone. Sure, I also knew about great tutorials for magically unlocking iPhones like:
How to unlock your 3G iPhone
Step-by-Step Guide to Unlock iPhone 3G
but an enchanted iPhone? Were we talking about mobile phones used by, perhaps, Cinderella?
More and more time went by. It reminded me of Jeopardy! I felt like I was about to match my intellect on....on....on national TV! I was tense! I was nervous! I could have starred in
The enchanted unlocked iphone was eluding me!
But I DIDN'T panic (yet!)...instead, I .....
"Jeepers, Barbara, Get ahold of yourself!", I silently commanded.
"When in doubt you know you can search on YouTube as well!" (and honestly, you really can - YouTube is replete with tons of educational resources! Mosey on over by 10 Fun Ways You Can Learn From YouTube and you'll see what I mean).
So off I went and away I searched for
unlock iphone
Here's what I saw!
Thus I turned elsewhere to look for enchanted iPhones
When in doubt, give Amazon a shout!
And then I realized...perhaps it's a Trick iPhone!
You can do lots of tricks with your iphone, did you know that?
Maybe (just maybe!) the enchanted iPhone is really a common, garden-variety iPhone that does tricks! I mean, just look at what iPhones can do for you:
12 iPhone Tricks You Might Not Have Known
Ultimate List of iPhone Tips and Tricks
Top 5 Nifty iPhone Tricks
You can even watch videos of iPhone tricks like the below!
And THEN I realized....there was only one way to find out!
Steeling my nerves with calmness and dignity, I.....
By this time, countless (countless, I say!) nanoseconds had passed. And with a blinding shock of gargantuan insights, it came to me with the force of a water-soaked Elmo plushie that had been fiercely frozen in the frightening freezer and then flung full-force at my stained glass window:
I needed to explore NOT a dark and stormy knight, but instead a suave and sensual Sebastian!
Like the one you see below.
So I dove into my romance novels. Yeehah!
Romance heros always know EVERYTHING about enchantment!
Yes, I confess. My secret vice is I ADORE romance novels! Anything by:
Bertrice Small
Judith Michael
Susan Johnson
or others results in at least 18 minutes of wondrous escapism before I return to my life as the Maverick Mom, Dynamic Trainer, Moose Wrangler, and More!
I mean, let's be serious. How could you NOT devour:
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byBut then agony reared its ugly head!
Oh no!
Patiently with great courage, I stoically read passages like:
"Smoldering with barely-checked passionately heart-stopping desire, he coldly gazed upon the shy hapless lovely lady Lydia, his eyes so tormented with agonizingly gut-wrenching passion that it seemed the heavens and earth had STOPPED in its tracks...yes, JARRED to a bone-numbing cessation with the sudden panic-inspiring crash that often results from children forgetting they're NOT Superman and they CANNOT heroically dash through solid brick walls!
Shy hapless lovely lady Lydia silently drew in her rasping breath. Her heart leapt about like 394 Mexican Jumping Beans who had consumed 2,938 cups of Starbucks coffee as she awaited his next move! And waited...and waited...until she realized...
That WASN'T the enchanted iPhone in his pocket - it was instead a..... SHOE NUNCHAKU!
So she kicked his sorry rear out the door and lived happily ever after.
Now, Nunchaku, gentle reader, has zero to do with enchanted iPhones as I'm sure you can realize!
So I did what any red-blooded American woman would do and turned to the comfort on which anyone can rely:
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byTime was getting short!
So I bravely procrastinated.
The seconds were crashing upon me with the unrelenting sheer unstoppable force of Godzilla researching Japan! My mind went blank! All seemed lost!
So I decide to recharge my batteries by witnessing true love once again (there's a total of 5 episodes of the following - do enjoy them all! They're truly magnificent.
But then....it finally came upon me! What does "Enchanted" look like?
I wasn't thinking outside the box!
I was looking at your typical nerdly iPhones....and didn't even THINK to considered how enchanted could appear! (iphone-specific, of course).
So back to eBay I flew! And by using my mathematically-trained Awesome Brain of Brilliance, I pounced upon the first enchanted-looking iPhone I could find - Swarvokski iPhones! (and oh, did you know...you can find Swarovski goodness adorning iPods too?)
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byIt wasn't there! So next I frantically searched for...
Time was running out!
None of the magnificent Swarovski iPhones were enchanted!
I was crushed! I was bemused!
BUT I DIDN'T GIVE UP!
No sirree indeed - I bravely flung myself among the following! Would my Enchanted iPhone be discovered? And even more critical....could I unlock it if it was?
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byI was baffled! But THEN! I heard an ominous rumble...
And my coffee cup started to vibrate....
Of course, during this time of reflection, I was thoughfully sipping the wondrous, magnificent, steaming hot coffee that was happily basking in my Sandra Boynton coffee cup.
All of a sudden, a small color-changing wisp of steam rose! From the palest shade of white to brilliant blue to rousing red to dashing green, the subtle colors transformed themselves again and again, forming mystical beings within their shimmering haze of translucence. And I heard a voice intone with the power of silent hurricanes the following:
"YOU MUST VENTURE TO THE FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE FOR THERE YOUR ANSWERS WILL BE REVEALED!"
A deafening clap of thunder more quiet than a cat's meow rolled through my house, leaving me bemused and staring at my now-normal beverage of the gods.
The Fortress of Solitude?
Say what?
Now, true, I was raised on Doc Savage who solved the following mysteries via HIS Fortress of Solitude:
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byAnd I teleported to the Fortress of Solitude.
Boy that was cold.
For those gentle readers who aren't aware of the Fortress of Solitude, it's located at the Arctic.
Only about a few hundred miles from the following. But hey, you can at least get a cup of hot coffee first!
It wasn't there.
My soul was perishing in agony!
No enchanted iPhone was at the Fortress of Solitude!
My worst fears were realized! Not only was I freezing my earlobes off, but no coffee was present either!
So I zoomed back home and poured myself a fresh batch of that manna from heaven, when the most unusual thing occurred!
If it's going to happen to anyone....
It will happen to me.
My newly-poured coffee started roiling in its cup! "Jeepers, not again!" I thought, but then I spied a super rectangular-shaped piece of futuristic technolgy floated OUT of my coffee! How had it gotten there in the first place? WAIT! The Dark and Stormy Knight! He had secreted it there!!!!!!
The mystery...it was solving itself!
I couldn't tear my attention from it.
"Behold!"
I heard.
It SPOKE!
"I am t--t-t-t-the en....chan........ted.....iphone....."
But the voice suddenly stopped...and I remembered it had been soaking IN my lovely coffee. My gosh, what had coffee done to its internal circuits?
It gently dropped into my cupped hands....so I pushed my glasses up my nose and did what every red-blooded woman would do.
I poured MORE coffee and silently made a mental note to chat with Oprah.
Regaining my poise and personality, I realized I HAD to resurrect this beacon from the future. But how? How could I dry the key that obviously enchants iPhones?
Over to YouTube I went and I searched on
dry wet phone
Would what I saw save the day?
YES! The heavens opened!
And coffee showered down!
YES! By following the instructions above, I was able to successfully dry the Key That Enchants iPhones! Its voice returned and it silently whispered the Secret For Which I was Searching. And that was:
"To unlock the Enchanted iPhone...."
You must....
We interrupt this fable with the following brief message!
Gentle reader, you've made it this far down the page! What do YOU think the answer is?
Share your ideas and stay tuned...it will be revealed shortly!
You must click your heels three times and say, There's no place like Apple!
0 points
Want to make your own iPhone Fable?
There's lots of cheap ways to do it!
Fable-writing is tons of fun (and you'll see the credits for some of the bizarre ideas you just enjoyed below!). But if YOU want to delve into the mysteries of iPhones and fables and (dare I say it, cheaper than retail), you can embrace the following.
After reading all that, you deserve it! :)
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byI hope you enjoyed this iPhone fable of fabulousness!
It was tons of fun to write too.
Share W/Your Friends!
Tweet it! 
Stumble it!
Rate it! 
Favorite it!
And THAT'S the fable of the Unlocked Enchanted iPhone. I hope you found it funny indeed!
Please feel free to share it with your network...humor makes everyone's day! Oh, and if you get a chance, if you enjoyed reading this lens, might you rate it up top? I very much appreciate your time, thanks!
Share This! widget code was learned from the post: Squidoo Shameless Plug Widget. Credit - GreekGeek
ulla_hennig wrote...
I so much enjoyed reading your fable - beautifully done!
Posted August 20, 2009
ulla_hennig wrote...
I so much enjoyed reading your fable - beautifully done!
Posted August 20, 2009
by lingstar
Life...it's Character-Building! 
Welcome! My name is Barbara Ling, and I'm all about:
- Achieving my goals in life by pro-...
Explore related pages
How to get a free ipod!- Get yourself a FREE Ipod. These offers have been personally reviewed by me...
A Users Guide to Webcams for Apple Mac users- The new Apple macbooks and imacs come with webcams fully integrated into the hou...
Apple Mac iBook Notebook- The iBook G4 line has been incredibly successful, for Apple. Why? It combines a...
Halloween- Halloween is about here again and kids of all ages will be wanting to have a gre...
