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I will admit that being a photographer in Las Vegas has given me a skewed vision of wedding chapels. Even so it seems like they have changed a lot from the way they used to be. Back in the day, there was no difficulty with picking out wedding chapels. In most cases, you would simply be married in the church you had attended since birth. Your wedding chapel was just, well, your chapel. It made a lot of sense, if you think about it. Although not all wedding chapels are gorgeous, the one you were raised in is the one that most accurately symbolizes your faith. A wedding is not so much a new beginning as a relationship meant to symbolize your continued commitment to community life. Why go to some exotic location, when you can do it at home?



Las Vegas chapels, of course, are the antithesis of this. In some ways, they actually seemed to pride themselves on their phoniness. Las Vegas wedding chapels are almost unreal. Some of them have gigantic, ornamental organs that don't play - mere props to create an impressive, Gothic image. Other ones are set up to look like ancient Egypt, or perhaps a woodland scene complete with neon flashing trees. Basically, modern American weddings have become something much different than what they used to be. Rather then symbols of lasting commitment, they are journeys into fantasy. It is no wonder that so few marriages last.

Of course, as a wedding photographer, I am definitely a part of it. Wedding photography, after all, has nothing to do with capturing reality, or even personality. Because images of beauty have become more and more standardized, good wedding photographs should be digitally edited until they most closely resemble conventional standards of beauty. Granted, there are some couples that want a wedding photographer with an artistic touch, but they are fewer and fewer. Just as people want their wedding ceremonies to be held on California beaches, they want their wedding pictures to show them as California beach dwellers - lean, tan, and flawless.

Don't get me wrong - there is nothing wrong with using a wedding chapel you find beautiful. Wedding chapels should be beautiful. Everything about the day should be beautiful. Even so, however, it is helpful to keep in mind that a wedding ceremony and a wedding party are different things. The ceremony should be quiet and sacred. the party is where you let loose.

When I had conceived of my wedding in the past, my plans had always been pretty simple. I wanted a big party and a small, simple wedding ceremony. I am never one to stand on ceremony. I figured that, if my bride-to-be agreed, a civil marriage ceremony would suffice. Needless to say, we had very different ideas about what constitutes appropriate wedding ceremonies. As much as I wanted to simplify everything down to the bare minimum, she wanted to complicate things.

The funny thing is that, in all the other aspects of our wedding, we had agreed on things. We have had no problems picking out a wedding chapel, a wedding reception location, or even thank you cards for the gifts that we were going to receive. We are both artists, you see, and it helps that we have the same aesthetic. It makes picking out bridal gowns, wedding centerpieces, and the like much easier. We didn't even need to hire a wedding planner - we knew what we wanted things to look like. Nonetheless, when it came down to the actual wedding ceremony, we had no common ground. Our ideas were as different as night and day.

For my fiancé, the traditional wedding ring ceremony was very important. She was in this very difficult position of having to balance the needs of her family with her own needs. You see, her folks were very traditional Catholics. The power of parental denial enabled them to pretend that she was still a practicing member of the faith, but we knew that they would become very upset if we didn't have a ceremony that was at least nominally Catholic. Nonetheless, she wanted us to write our wedding vows. In short, we had to balance two very different things: a traditional wedding ceremony and a modern mindset where we were able to make our own promises. It wasn't easy.

In the end, we compromised on the wedding ceremony. I didn't like the public nature of wedding ceremonies, although I had no problem with the promise of commitment. We decided, then, that we would speak the standard vows in the wedding chapel, and say our own special wedding vows in private. That way, it could be a more sincere, intimate moment. I would say that neither of us were quite happy with it, but no one was so annoyed with the results that it would ruin the day. All in all, it was a pretty good compromise.

I never really realized how much went into picking out wedding cards until I had to do it myself. I didn't see any reason to think that wedding invitations would be any more difficult to pick out than birthday invitations, anniversary cards, or any other routine forms of greeting for special occasions. After all, although people ideally only have one wedding, a lot of the aspects of it are still pretty routine. You hire a band just like everyone else, you dress in a similar fashion, you have similar choices for food, and you even pick out a similar location. Some people get extravagant, consulting wedding planners to help them find exotic destinations and themes, but your majority of weddings follow some pretty well set traditions. Since that is the case, why should it be so difficult to pick out a wedding card?

In reality, wedding cards are extremely difficult to pick out. I never really thought about it before, but there are many different fonts, many different possible wordings, and even many different styles of paper that can be used. Do you want your wedding cards to look formal, or would you prefer them to have a more modern, laid-back appearance? Do you want them to be extravagant, or do you want simple wedding greeting cards? And that doesn't even get into wedding thank you cards. Should they match your wedding invitations, or should they be completely different? Should they come with a great deal of elegant wording, or should they be blank to allow you to come up with your own personalized response to each gift giver?

To tell you the truth, it was very difficult for me to make up my mind on these issues. It isn't that I'm very picky. I have just the opposite problem. All wedding cards look more or less the same to me, so I couldn't choose which one to send. Since my wife is legally blind, she was not much of a help in the matter either. In the end, we decided to consult her mother and let her make the final decision. That way, at least someone would be extremely happy with the wedding invites, and it would make her feel appreciated as well. I have to say that the cards that she picked wouldn't have been my first choice. They were a little too formal for my tastes, and seemed stilted and insincere. Even so, they were definitely appropriate for the occasion, and it was nice to have someone making the decision for us.

Weddings are a lot of hard work, even though many don't think of it as work. When you first start, there are not many things that bother you, but as time goes on, you may find that things start to go wrong, and you are worrying more than you are having fun. When it seems your stress has reached the breaking point, it might be the best time to go take care of your bridal registry. This is something you may only have to do once (depending on your choice of stores) and it is always a lot of fun.

You should think hard about where you want to set up your bridal registry. Though you may think you want to go to all of the high end stores, you do have to be realistic about things. You may be able to afford things from those stores, but can the rest of your family and friends? If you don't think it is realistic to set up your bridal registry in an expensive store, you should find some good mid-priced stores that might better suit those who might be buying for you.



You can always mix it up and do a bridal registry at a few different stores. Most families are a mix of different incomes, so you can always find a few stores with different price ranges so that everyone can choose where they want to go, and they won't feel pressured to spend money that they don't have. Everyone wants to wish you well for your wedding, but it should never put them in financial distress. Having a bridal registry at many different places will take more time, but your guests will appreciate it.

You should always have fun when you are setting up your bridal registry, but you should also think about what you really need. Don't put a lot of things on there that might be fun, but aren't very practical. It depends on what you need and what you already have, but be sure to make your list one that you can live with. What might seem cute while you are setting up your bridal registry may very well end up in your closet, unused, after the big day has come and gone. Though you don't have to take your spouse-to-be with you when you do this, you may want to make time to do so. That way, you both have say in what is on the list.

There is a lot to think about when planning a wedding. If you are the bride, you have so much on your mind that something is bound to be forgotten. That is when wedding planner books, or even hiring wedding planners might be a good idea. I found that despite my good planning and my book, I was still forgetting some small things that would have ended up being very big problems on my wedding day. I completely forgot about bridal purses, and had it not been for my maid of honor, I may have forgotten completely. I would have been sorry.

Your wedding day is not a day when you want to carry around your regular purse. You spend a lot of time making sure your dress, shoes, hair, accessories, and even your stockings are just right. That look is ruined unless you have bridal purses that match. I haven't met a woman yet that did not need some sort of purse with her on her wedding day. If you forget to look at bridal purses, you may find you are suddenly all out of whack when you should be feeling put together and calm.



My maid of honor had called me about two weeks before my wedding asking me about a few things. One of those things was bridal purses. To my horror, I realized that I had not thought about it and I had no idea if I had time to go out and find one. I had too much to do, and was working on top of that. She told me not to worry, and asked me to take a picture of my dress and email it to her so she could find something for me. She lived a number of hours away, so a photo of the dress would have had to do.

I had quite a few bags of my own, but none of them were anything near what bridal purses should be. I did not own anything in white, let alone the off white that was my dress. When she came up for my wedding, she handed me a purse that was absolutely perfect, and even matched my dress. Thank goodness for her and her good thinking! I never thought about bridal purses, but by midday it became very apparent that I needed one, and after all these years, I still thank her for thinking of it, and taking care of the problem for me.

Women and footwear make the perfect pair. There is no set that is more important in a woman's life than her bridal shoes. The dress, flowers and jewelry need to be complimented with a quality pair of dress shoes. This element works to pull everything together. Some think that the shoes make the outfit even when it comes to wedding apparel.

You have plenty of choices when it comes to bridal shoes so make sure that you have a good idea of what style you want in general. The first consideration that you want to make is the season that the wedding will be held. A summer ceremony will call for different bridal shoes than ones that would suit a winter wedding.

Shopping by style is a great approach to narrowing down your search. You can select from different designs that have a general theme. For example, a summer wedding ceremony would call for strapped sandals, open-toed shoes, sling backs or peep-toes. Each of these designs is wonderful for warm summer days and they look fantastic.

Weddings that occur during late fall; winter and early spring will require different women's formal footwear. Closed-toe shoes are better for colder months. You can choose from chunky platform or wedge heels, round or square toe designs or even mules and slides. Looking at shoes in terms of design is an ideal way to find the best bridal shoes for your special day.

Going really casual for your event? Why not embrace the casual feeling by choosing fun shoes that have a relaxed attitude. Many brides are wearing adorable ballet shoes, slippers and even flip flops on their wedding day. These bridal shoes are more suitable for the reception that for the church but they make comfy additions to your wedding attire for the long day.

Brides on a budget may want to take a slightly different approach to shopping for bridal shoes. You can always opt to shop by price. This is a great way to make sure that you stay within your budget. Many online shops offer an option for you to shop for your wedding shoes by price range. You won't be tempted by pricy shoes because they won't be presented in your search.

For some brides money is no option. These ladies may want to shop by designer. This is the best way to find the right match for your gown. Simply ask your wedding apparel consultant which designer bridal shoes go with your gown. She can do the homework for you.

There are plenty of other approaches that you can take but the three outlined here are on the top of the list. Shopping for bridal shoes is fun once you have a plan.

When I was first dating my husband, we were pretty informal about our anniversaries. Neither of us were people to stand on ceremony, and usually an anniversary party was just an excuse to spend time together. We would drive out to the ocean, walk in a park, or even just go see a movie. We would end the day with a nice dinner and a romantic evening together. Simple and fun, that was the rule.



When we got married however, we suddenly became much more formal in our lifestyle. Neither of us discussed it, but on some level we both felt that it was time to start settling down a little bit. Things began to change from our first wedding anniversary. We had always made fun of our parents and their extravagant wedding anniversaries. On their golden wedding anniversary, for example, they invited practically everyone they knew. My siblings and I were convinced that it was probably a bigger crowd that had attended their original wedding. We were all expected to get them anniversary presents with the extravagance of wedding gifts, and if anyone was foolish enough to not buy something nice, they certainly would be out of the loop for the next six months.

When we married, I assumed that we would never have that type of attitude towards her wedding anniversaries. You see, the way the world looked to me when I was young, what mattered was living your life every day. Big events, anniversaries, and historical dates aren't that important. What is important is right now. I had always felt that celebrating wedding anniversaries was not necessary. You simply had to celebrate every day of your marriage. Once I was married though, something changed. Suddenly, I felt the need to mark time in a way I had never done before.

The first wedding anniversary was not that formal. It was a weekend getaway, and although it was quite a bit more extravagant than our usual getaways, we certainly didn't make that big a deal about it. After that, however, all of our wedding anniversaries have gotten bigger and bigger. Now that we have been married for five years,we will typically start planning things out a month in advance. We'll have a formal dinner, go to the opera, and perhaps take a weekend trip. Don't get me wrong - I love the celebration. Nonetheless, it seems like I've lost something. My youthful spontaneity may be going forever.