Sweet Valentines -- or Brilliantly Evil ones! Which would you rather give your darling in February?
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Are you sweet... or crunchy?
This is a valentine just for you -- that is, if you're a twisted, evil bastard like Marty is. (If not, you might want to try Hallmark.)
Valentines for Villains! A whole page of bonafide Valentine's wickedness for you and your sweetheart to share.
Are evil valentines the best thing since sliced _____? Are you planning to stick with something more... traditional, this year? Tell us what you think -- or rather, tweet it -- just below! (If you don't use Twitter, you can add your favorite evil Valentine's quote at the bottom of the page!)
Happy Valentine's, Villains!
Got an evil Valentine's quote? Come play!
Quote, opine, and have a grand old (evil) time...
Sweet Valentines -- or Brilliantly Evil ones! Which would you rather give your darling in February?
I say...
What others are saying...
Villainous Romance
REAL Valentines for Villains
Tired of links? Try paper instead.
- Valentines for Villains Mini-Cards 32-pack ~ Grisly Greetings, by Martin Whitmore
- Remember the days when Valentine's Day meant gluing construction paper hearts to a shoebox with a slot cut in the top, and hoping little Jenny Thomas would give you one of her good valentines? Those days may be over, but it's never too late to corrupt their memory and cash in on a little nostalgia by handing out some very special (and very twisted) Grisly Greetings mini-valentines!
- Three Twisted Valentines (with envelopes) ~ Grisly Greetings, by Martin Whitmore
- The Valentine's 3-pack: the status symbol for people with a whole lotta love to give. Maybe you've got someone so special that one card just doesn't cut it. Maybe you're a jetsetting heartthrob who's got loves waiting for you in a few different cities across the globe. ...or maybe you just want to show the three cheerleaders chained up in your basement how much they mean to you.
- Evil Surgeon Valentine (with envelope) ~ Grisly Greetings, by Martin Whitmore
- Y'know, I don't believe this guy actually has a degree... he looks like the kind of "doctor" who does exploratory surgery with a rusty cordless drill in an alley behind a dry cleaner's. Anyway, he's not the type you want rooting around in your insides, so maybe you should just give him what he wants.
- Heartworm Valentine (with envelope) ~ Grisly Greetings, by Martin Whitmore
- This cuddly little guy wants to love you from the inside out! ...or was that eat you from the inside out? It's hard to tell with parasites. Either way, he's gonna put a skylight in your left atrium, and a bunch of eggs in your ventricles.
- Zombie Valentine (with envelope) ~ Grisly Greetings, by Martin Whitmore
- This delightful dead fellow is happy to give you his heart this Valentine's Day... but don't reach for his delicious brains or you're likely to pull back a bloody stump! ...and contract a nasty case of Zombie.
Valentines for Villains as Schoolyard Trend
Valentines for Villains Quotables
Add your wicked Valentine's quote here!
Oh, you know you've thought of one. You're just hanging on for the right moment. You're standing there looking trim and suave, and your sweety is flushed with anticipation, waiting for gifts. You're holding them behind your back, because you have the perfect line to deliver. It's clever, romantic, and completely evil. You smile seductively, your lips part, and you say...
worldmegan wrote...
"Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is... slow it down to a shambling lurch..." From the, uh, Princess Bride? Original... zombie... cast...?
Posted January 19, 2009
Rudi Whitmore wrote
"I'd love you more medium-rare!"
Posted January 18, 2009
worldmegan wrote...
"When love is not madness, it is not love." Pedro Calderon de la Barca, and I didn't change a word of it! :P
Posted January 18, 2009
Keep your Greetings Grisly!
