Verbal communication

When you tell your son or daughter to put away their toys, you'll find that word by word, the point of the communication is very clear. Of course, as any parent or caregiver will tell you, there is a lot more that you can read from this simple phrase than just the words! For instance, you might say the words in a very short or clipped fashion, indicating that you are running out of patience, or you might say it very offhandedly if you know that your child is especially obedient and will do as you say. If you are really angry, you might raise the volume of your voice or drop it. The thing about verbal communication is that there is so much more that goes into it than just the words that you choose!

When you are looking at verbal communication, one thing that you can look at is how fast you talk. When you get happy or excited, you will tend to talk faster, but this can also happen if you are feeling nervous or panicky. When you have more adrenaline in your system, you will tend to speak a great deal more quickly. Similarly, when you want to make sure that someone understands you, you might choose to speak more clearly and to enunciate each word and sound.

Another aspect of verbal communication is your tone. Have you ever heard of someone saying something "lightly"? You'll find that this means that the tone of their voice is higher than it would be if they were being serious. When you want to get important information across, or when you want to make sure that someone takes you seriously, you'll find that your tone will drop, and you might start speaking in a deeper voice.

Of course another thing that you want to think about is your volume. The volume of your voice tends to denote your urgency and your level emotion. The louder you get, the more emotional or invested you tend to be in the topic at hand. You'll also find that some people will use volume as a tool to punish or bully others into giving them what they want, and this tactic can be very damaging. Raising the volume of your voice is a lot like a large dog growling to intimidate other dogs; it's a primitive thing that other people automatically respond to. When you are in a charged situation, remember that raising your voice is one way to escalate the situation and make it worse, so remember to rein yourself in.

You'll also find that the tone and cadence of your voice, along with your facial expression, can go a long way towards sending a very specific message to the people that you are talking to. For instance, saying one thing while obviously meaning the other produces sarcasm, which is can be humorous, but can also be quite hurtful. Children who are exposed to sarcasm early and often tend to have problems with communication later in life, and once again, there are plenty of people who will use it to bully others, no matter how old they are or what situation they happen to be in.

Make sure that you understand what you are saying; it can go a long way towards making your communication with your friends, your family and your co-workers a great deal more straightforward.