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Marriage problems

Having been a marriage counselor for the past 20 years, I was devastated when I received this letter:

Dear Mom,
As you know, Todd and I are due to be married in just a few short weeks, and I am writing you, not as your daughter but as your client. You see, I know that I told you that we did not need the pre marriage counseling that you recommended, however, lately there is an issue that has really been bothering me. Todd is a great guy, but he has become a little bit controlling of late and now he wants me to take my bank account, of the money that I have saved for myself over the past several years and put his name on it. This would not be such a bad thing, except it seems that everything that we have purchased together over the past few months for our life together, he seems to think of as his. I just want to keep my account for myself, I mean I have worked hard and earned it on my own, and I think that I have a right to spend that money as I see fit. Anyway, I will be sitting down to talk to him about this after our honeymoon, I don't want to spoil the wedding, and then we will iron this out. Can you help me save my marriage? Do you have any advice on how I should go about addressing these issues and concerns with Todd? Thanks as always for all your wisdom and guidance!

Love your daughter,
Melinda

Well, I think that it goes without saying that I called her immediately. I told her that with or without marriage therapy, she needed to address these issues with Todd sooner rather than later. So she went to dinner with him, and just told him that she worked very hard for her own money, and that she wanted the right to go and spend that money herself as she wished. Well, apparently Todd's control issues went a little deeper than the money thing and his response was, "I don't want you running off shopping by yourself doing whatever behind my back". And that in my daughter's world was a deal breaker and the marriage never happened.

I am glad that I was available to give Melinda some marriage help when she truly needed it, and even though she was sad that the wedding didn't go on as planned, she met a wonderful man about a year later and they married and are very happy.