WHITLEY HODGES - NOVELIST

Frankly, I get a real charge from writing about the terribly anal sexually frustrated Republican males of America.

To this day I do not understand how the Republicans in Congress procreate. It must be difficult to have sex with your wife when you must wear your three-piece pin-striped suit, button down white shirt, power necktie, Alligator belt and silver buckle, and wing-tip lace-up shoes to bed. More curious is how they can open their flies, get past their cotton whitey-tighties, and actually pull their little penises out to consummate the act. One major problem is that they usually get so frustrated from the lust in their fundamentalist rotten hearts that they lose their little erections.

Most of the Republican women I know have a Democrat in the woodpile for sex and children.

In this book, my characters are drawn from the sexually frustrated, effeminate little boys found in the ultra right of the New York City cable broadcasting industry.

After the emasculation done to them by Obama in 2008, I doubt we will see much from them in the way of manly-men in the remnants of the Republican Party (as hoped for by Arnold Schwarzenegger). Yep, most of them are girly-men, Arnie.

I hope you enjoy the book.

It can be found at www.lulu.com/whitley in PDF and paperback, or in KINDLE electronic format at www.amazon.com.

IN THE SPIRIT OF BLAZING SADDLES, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN, LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, and ROCKY HORROR SHOW, the author reveals the scabrous truth about the hardened criminals, thieves, prostitutes, and sexual perverts of the Carolinas -- and that's just among the lawyers and judges.

CHOCKED FULL OF SONGS: TRUST ME I'M A LAWYER, NEVER BEGRUDGE YOUR JUDGE, WHORES GET LAID A LOT, WHY DO JUDGES WEAR ROBES, FIRST LET'S KILL ALL THE LAWYERS, and more.

WHITLEY HODGES stresses one theme: SEX IS A VERY, VERY FUNNY ACT -- EVEN WITH LAWYERS!

ANN, A BORDERLINE PERSONALITY WHO IS PART OF AN ULTRA CONSERVATIVE POLITICAL MOVEMENT BASED IN THE CABLE TELEVISION NEWS WORLD OF NEW YORK CITY, HAS AN ACCIDENT. SHE GOES TO FASCIST PURGATORY WHERE SHE ENCOUNTERS SEVERAL FASCISTS FROM THE PAST, E.G. ADOLPH HITLER AND BENITO MUSSOLINI. ANN IS CAUGHT BETWEEN GOD AND SATAN AND HER INSATIABLE DRIVE TO BE A PERFECT FASCIST. HER VENTURE IS ZANY, WACHY, BUT SO TRUE OF CERTAIN BLOND, BITCH FASCIST LAWYERS IN NYC. HER ADVENTURE OCCURS WITH THE 2008 CRASH OF THE GEORGE BUSH ADMINISTRATION. SHE IS FACED WITH A "COLORED" PRESIDENT WHEN OBAMA IS ELECTED. SHE MAY RETURN TO HER BODY, GO TO HELL, OR BE OBLITERATED FROM EXISTENCE......

MAN HAS ALWAYS LONGED, PRAYED AND SEARCHED FOR ESCAPE FROM THE WORLD AROUND HIM.

HE HAS ALWAYS WANTED TO FLEE FROM HUMAN SOCIETY, AND PLACE HIMSELF IN A HEAVEN WITHOUT HUMAN REALITY, I.E., WITHOUT BIRTH, DEATH, AND THE UNCERTAINTY OF HIS FINAL RESTING PLACE. MAN WANTED GODS WHO WOULD BESTOW UPON HIM THEIR LIFE ETERNAL.

RELIGION WAS INVENTED TO GIVE MAN SPIRITUAL LIFE INSURANCE.

WE CAN SEE THE IMPACT OF THE HERCULES OBJECT ON THE RELIGIOUS MINDS OF EARTH, AND THE OTHER WORLDS IN AND OUT OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM. THE RELIGIOUS FANATICS FEARED THAT A GOD WAS APPROACHING WHO WOULD GRANT OR DENY THEM THEIR PRECIOUS CONSECRATION AND SALVATION. SO, THEY ALL TORE OFF INTO SPACE TO MEET THEIR RESPECTIVE GODS OR OTHERWISE. THE COMPETITION WAS INTENSE.

INANNA'S REVENGE - The Return of the Anunnaki is an OUTRAGEOUS, IRREVERENT, EROTIC and SATIRICAL URBAN FANTASY involving INANNA, the ancient Sumerian Goddess of Love and War, and an American lawyer she takes as her consort. She is VERY ANGRY at the all-male priesthoods of the world religions.

INANNA returns to Earth as a modern woman, takes a trial lawyer as a consort, and has him prosecute a case before the Grand Assembly of Anunnaki. She asks the Grand Assembly to determine whether man shall continue on his current path to self-destruction, be altered in some say, or eliminated from Earth.

If you are an ENLIGHTENED, PAGAN, SPIRITUAL OR RELIGIOUSLY LIBERAL WOMAN, one who feels Voltaire was right when he said the Church is a "GIANT MALE UTERUS," you will enjoy this zany and biting satire about modern priests, rabbis, and imams and their drives to oppress women. BUY A COPY AND GIVE IT TO YOUR MAN!

WHITLEY HODGES spares no one - He takes no prisoners. He goes after the priesthoods, their fears of women, their often strange sexual proclivities, their fear of the menstrual flag, and their fraud and deceit from the time of the Garden of Eden to the present day.

THIS BOOK IS CHOCKED FULL OF HIDDEN TRUTHS ABOUT THE WESTERN FAITHS. IN INANNA'S REVENGE YOU WILL DISCOVER THE TRUE IDENTITY OF MOSES AND AARON. YOU WILL DISCOVER THE TRUE IDENTITY AND NATURE OF THE GOD YAHWEH OR JEHOVAH. YOU WILL LEARN A GREAT DEAL ABOUT THE ONGOING FRAUD AND DECEIT OF THE WESTERN RELIGIONS AND THEIR OPPRESSION OF WOMEN.

THE NOVEL RECEIVED FIVE STARS FROM ONE EUROPEAN CRITIC.

With COMMENTARIES by the SHAMAN OF THE KUDZU, JEWEL OF THE BLACK WATER LOTUS, DRUID OF THE MISTLETOE, ALLIGATOR WHISPERER, and GREAT GAWFF GURU, WHITLEY HODGES.
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My Fore Word!
As a Diaspora Scot and Irish Celt, I naturally have a nostalgic longing for Celtic things. Is it no wonder, therefore, that I gravitated to the Holy Quest of Gawff, which has its origins in the pastures and sheep bunkers of my ancestors ancient homelands of Scotland and Ireland.

Verily, you should surely understand that I am a bit zany. I learned as a twelve-year old caddy that if one does not have a genuine sense of humor, one should not seek enlightenment on the Holy Courses and Holy Links of the Holy Quest. If you do not have a Celtic zany bent, and you do not get a thrill from a whipped stick striking a small white pill and causing it to hiss through the air over the freshly-cut Bermuda grass of a 6,000 yard lond sheep pasture -- well, there's always Bikini Suicide Frisbee matches or bungee jumping somewhere nearby.

--There are over 47,700 miles of Interstate Highways currently planted in biomass.

--There are over 157,000 miles of Electric Grid right-of-ways in American currently planted in biomass.

--Whitley Hodges offers Americans a revolutionary set of Plans.

--Give the lands free of charge to our farmers (and especially our veterans) for the planting of ethanol producing biomass such as corn and switchgrass.

--Whitley's plans will ultimately free us from our current dependency on Big Oil and their good buddies in the criminal cartel known as OPEC.

--The lands are already landscaped, being planted, and just waiting to be converted over to ethanol production biomass.

--The lands are OWNED BY THE PEOPLE AND THE STATES, not the federal government.

--It's not a case of Drill, Baby, Drill, rather is a case of Plant, Baby, Plant.

--If we adopt the Whitley Hodges plans, THE ETHANOL WILL FLOW!